Fear Disguised as Compassion

How many times has someone rained on your parade or tried to put the kibosh on your idea(s) or squash your dreams? It happens all the time, and usually includes, “I care about you so much,” or, “I’m just looking out for your best interests,” but it’s really only fear disguised as compassion.

They don’t really care about you, or else they’d be more supportive. Okay, that was harsh, maybe they do care about you, but they’ve let their fear override taking the higher road of loving and supporting you to achieve your highest and best.

Let’s face it, most people are governed by fear. It’s the way we’ve been taught to live life on this planet, in a constant state of fear. Fear from the government or the police, fear of not being accepted by others or doing good enough. This is how we are easily controlled and herded like sheep, in a constant state of fear… and if things get too good or comfortable, look out. Because something very frightening is about to happen to make sure you’re slapped back into the state of fear.

We project these fear(s) onto the people we supposedly care about and we do our best to cover it up to make it look like compassion, like we care so much about whoever it is we’re “trying to protect,” when really, we’re projecting our own fear onto him or her.

Maybe you’ve done this (I know I have). When my brother was deciding to make a particular life choice that would have huge impact on the remainder of his life, I did my best to dissuade him from pursuing this path, and to me, it really felt like compassion, or more, like I was trying to save him from making the most tragic decision of his life.

Why? Because I was truly afraid for him (but not really). The truth was, I had made a similar choice early on in my life, with hugely less than desirable results. I did not want the same thing to happen to him. But guess what? I wasn’t him.

He maintained his position and stayed true to what he felt was his calling and became hugely successful following this endeavor. In retrospect, I can look back and see, my compassionate concern had little or nothing to do with my brother’s decision and everything to do with my fear based on my experience. Nothing to do with my brother and everything to do with me.

Since then, I’ve realized that we’re all uniquely different and we all are doing the best we can with what we have. Two people can do exactly the same things, step-by-step, and have entirely different results. One could go through the experience with invaluable yet harsh lessons to be learned in preparation for his or her next phase of life, the other wildly successful.

Now, I am more cautious about cautioning others who are pursuing their dreams.

Since I’m in the dream business, I am constantly surrounded by people pursuing their dreams. So much so, that I am often surprised when I find myself in a public venue politely engaging in chit-chat and discover most people are not pursuing their dreams.

I forget, sometimes, that the rest of the world is so fearful, and they have given up on the hope that their dreams would ever come true, except for the hope of maybe winning the lottery, one day.

Most of them can recall a time when they were more optimistic about potential positive outcomes, had a dream, took a shot at it, and was either not supported, or failed, and just gave up on it, as if it was just some childish fantasy.

And as we know, misery loves company, so those who had a dream and walked away from it, fearing that it wouldn’t come true anyway, try to gather people “we care about” around us, and persuade them to feel the same way we do, in their best interests.

With the best intentions, we try to gently smash their dreams, because we fear they will suffer the same heartbreak that we did when we had a dream.

How dare we do that?

If you really cared about that person (you were trying to save from himself or herself) you would boldly support them in their pursuit of his or her dreams.

Shame on you (me, or anyone) for projecting my fear onto someone else.

Surely, you may share your experience with him or her, being careful not to communicate in any way that you might not be 100% supportive of their decision and effort to follow their dreams. Maybe you’re sharing your experience will help them avoid a potential pitfall as they go forward and seek to achieve their highest and best.

Therein is the redemption for your experience or failure. Every misstep or failure has a lesson in it. In most cases, the lesson is for you, but maybe, in this case, it was for that person who has raised the courage to go for their dream.

We all have our own individual paths to follow and journey to embark upon, celebrate those who have the drive to be true to themselves. Maybe they stumble and fall along the way. Support them, help them get up and back on their feet again. Be there for them, when they need a shoulder to lean on, but never say, “I told you so.” Instead, say,

“I love you and I will support you in whatever you decide to do, because I believe in you, and you will do what is right for you.”

If you really care about them, bless and support them for going for it no matter what.

You Hurt Me!

If someone intentionally and maliciously does something to hurt your feelings, what is really going on?

You could be moving on down the road of your life humming and singing along with your life’s soundtrack, smiling and having the best time and a friend might take note of it and say, “I wish I could be more like you.”

Of course, they could, if he or she chose to do so, but after a while, their reverence for your optimistic lifestyle wears on them and can turn to resentment. Because he or she cannot understand what it’s like to live a life in a higher vibration this person might secretly wish something ill, bad, or evil will visit your life for a little reality check from his or her point of view.

People who do not live their lives in the higher vibrations often cannot conceive of such a thing. To them, the good things they covet in life (like happiness, beauty, abundance, freedom, good health, and life, etc.) are only available to those who are unworthy. By unworthy, their paradigm would suggest that one may only possess the good things in life by working hard, sweating blood, forsaking all, in selfish dedication to the pursuit of money.

And even if the object of their attention is a person who has done just that, and is by their own definition “deserving” of such favor, they demonize that person for being a selfish glutton and money-grubbing fiend, or even worse, if they haven’t earned it, or it came to them easily by inheritance, winning the lottery, or some other undeserved good fortune.

Journalists and paparazzi cannot resist the idea of knocking someone down a rung or two if given the slightest opportunity, likewise your friend or neighbor might like to see you have a little attitude adjustment every once and a while, and might be willing to play a role in it behind your back.

This kind of tug-of-war isn’t just between the haves and the have-nots, you will also see this in moral fixations. For instance, if someone is always polite or kind, generous and serving others, is always on time or maintains a strong work ethic, or any other life choices one may have made which separate themselves from the majority their peers.

If you are one of these people, you have chosen to live your life in a way that is differentiated from the rest of the people who choose by default not to do so. In this respect, you are no longer normal, and you cannot blame normal people for acting normal.

While normal people might admire your qualities or lifestyle, they’d feel much better seeing you fall to a level of “normal” and be like them.

Sometimes, the same people you hope to trust, or call friend will do or say something intentionally to hurt your feelings or even damage your reputation, in hopes of bringing you down to a lower vibration.

Then there are other times when you find yourself compromised, disrespected, and hurt by someone, at least not maliciously or on purpose, “but you have intentionally hurt me.”

In neither circumstance, whether you were maliciously attacked or unintentionally harmed in some way, you cannot blame this person for doing so.

It’s easy to make it all about you because you’re the one who has been attacked and is hurting, but you fail to see the pain being borne by the person who has lashed out at you. You have no idea what he or she is going through. This I know, if you were that person, who had lived his or her life up until that moment, you, too, would have done exactly the same thing in that moment in time.

When people are feeling bad, sometimes making someone else feel bad makes them feel better. Can you blame anyone for looking for any means to relieve some of the pressure of the constant pain of living their lives? Maybe yes, maybe no, but who knows what you might do if you were in such pain?

If someone is mean to you, how should you respond? With dignity and compassion. If someone says something behind your back with is not true, ignore it. If you are confronted with it, laugh it off and walk away. You do not have to dignify a false accusation with a response.

Don’t pay attention to what anybody says about you unless it is true.

You are not obligated to ever participate in the perpetuation of anyone else’s drama. Simply, let, “your yea be yea and your nay be nay,” (because anything else is plain evil, anyway) Matthew 5:37 (my translation). Just don’t go there.

Always be kind and compassionate, being mindful to not call-out the state of pain your accuser might be in. Just smile, gently laugh (not to humiliate), and thank them for sharing their point of view, possibly inviting them to do some fact checking elsewhere.

People who like you, admire you, maybe even love you, might do or say something to hurt you, either intentionally or unintentionally. And when they do, remember this,

It’s not about you

It’s about them

Let them now that no matter what they do or say, you’re not going to take it personally, and you still care for them. Bless those who hurt you.

Blessing Social Media is Good 4 U

When life seems to be a relentless struggle for survival, it’s so good to have someone in your corner. In this day and age when face-to-face relationships are hard to manage, social media has arrived on the scene to help fill in the gap. Even when we are warned about the dangers of social media as it gets blamed for the deterioration of human interaction, the truth is, it has also saved the lives of many.

For those who need to find someone in their corner with whom they can resonate with, regardless of your social status in the real world, you can find someone empathetic to your situation, cause, or plight.

In this way, social media plays an important part in the social matrix of your life. When you desperately need someone on your side, who can see things from your perspective, can feel what you’re feeling or has walked a mile in your shoes, social media can give you access to the people you need for support, when it would be difficult to do so in the real world.

I know when I have been at my lowest, and it seemed like there was no one there, I was desolate, alone, and felt as though there was no hope, or reason to go on, social media bridged the gap and helped me get through the toughest of times.

People, although virtual, were there to care, understand, love, and support me, when the rest of my life in the real world was crumbling all around me.

With all the negative press that social media gets (much of it warranted), there is another side to it as well. This virtual instant access to others can help build up and support the human condition as well.

Certainly, as with anything with huge positive potential, it can be abused and used with negative intent, but on the other side it can have incredible potential for making the world a better place.

Social media is a powerful medium which can either impact the world for good or for evil, and it appears that in order to keep its effectiveness, it must remain neutral. It’s up to you to decide how you will wield the awesome power of this electronic networking tool.

Social media is a microcosm of the totality of life on our planet. All types of people, philosophies, personality types, and beliefs are represented, and for the most part are able, and encouraged, to share their thoughts and feelings freely.

You may not always agree (and there is no reason why you should be required to) and you always have a choice in how you will represent yourself via social media. You can choose to fight, counter-attack, bless, or love. It’s up to you.

It may serve you well to think about how you are showing up in social media.
Are you representing yourself as the person you would like to be remembered as?

I know when Aaron was killed in Afghanistan, his social media was a worldwide representation of who he was, and it still survives him, even today.

I have many friends who have since passed away and their social media accounts give us all something to look back on to remember, honor, laugh, and reflect on the impact they have had on our lives when they were here.

Someday, after I am long gone, the virtual footprints of my social media interactions may be all that remains.

Just remember, your social media might represent the kind of person you are (or were) when you were here, on your life’s journey.

How would you like to be remembered in your social media?

I’m Pissed Off!

You’ve been abused, neglected, or disrespected, you’ve had about all you could take. If asked how you feel, you might grit your teeth and express, “I’m pissed off!” if you were able to practice some restraint. You might like to express yourself with other superlatives, but nonetheless, you’re mad, and rightfully so.

Someone has hurt you. Maybe they did not slash you with a machete or shoot you with a gun, but the pain is just as real, possibly worse, because a physical wound could be treated at the hospital and you could return to normal physical operation with nothing more than a scar to remind you of the initial wound, while emotional wounds of those who have hurt you remain and can persist for much longer.

How you respond to being pissed off for being hurt or suffering some injustice has a huge impact on the quality of life you experience along your life’s journey. If you harbor bitterness and resentment, you will experience premature aging, advanced illness, and a shorter lifespan. There is also evidence which suggests if you entertain thoughts of being victimized by someone or something, you will attract more victimization, thereby increasing the damage done by just thinking about former transgressions.

If you are in the frame of mind of feeling or saying,

“I’m pissed off!”

At someone or about something, you’re inviting more reasons to be pissed off.

Do you like the feeling of being pissed off? (Most people do not) and there’s good reason, because if you’re pissed, or have bitterness or resentment in your heart, your body is actually suffering deterioration. Your otherwise healthy state of being, both physically and emotionally, is breaking down. Your immune system declines making your more subject to illness and disease and your state of mind becomes fragile, leading to anger, outrage, sadness, or depression.

What Can You Do When You’re Pissed Off?

So, what can you do when you’re apt to shout out, “I’m pissed off!”

You basically have two options in general. You can be part of the problem and fight back, or you can be part of the solution, practicing tolerance and let it go. Revenge and tolerance are on opposite ends of the spectrum.

Fight Back

The emotional stance of fighting back can be performed either by launching a counter-attack of any kind in the real world, in your mind, or by adding to the energetic momentum by focusing on the cause of your angst, or the negative results of it. Whether you’re fighting back in the real world, or just in your mind, the psychological and physiological deterioration is the price you pay for entertaining the idea or engaging in a battle over the even that pissed you off.

While holding it in may help you to save face in the real world, far more damage is done to your body, mind, and spirit in the process of burying the emotions inside. Doing so will literally decrease your quality of life and lead you to an early grave, but you will be more respected in the community for your ability to handle whatever life throws at you.

In this respect, it’s healthier to have expressive emotional outbursts or to launch revenge-fueled counter-attacks, but depending on your definition of integrity or dignity, this may not be the best approach to promote a better world, for retaliation only makes whatever your fighting against more powerful.

You don’t want to become a generator of negative energy. If you want to take a stand against something, do not oppose it, instead support and turn your attention toward a positive solution.

It may be wiser to consider a bit of,

Tolerance

From the perspective of tolerance, you see things from a different point of view. You imagine what it must be like to walk a mile, or live a life, in someone else’s shoes. From this compassionate and loving viewpoint, you can understand and see that most injustices are neither malicious or fueled by any intention to harm you or make you feel bad in any way. More the most part, people are just trying to get through life the best they can with what they have.

You could forgive your transgressor, but that establishes you as a victim. A higher resonating vibration is not to need to establish yourself as a victim requiring recompense or forgiveness but to disempower the whole affair by realizing there was never an intent to harm you. You realize that had you been that person, living their life in their shoes, at that moment in time, you would have done the same thing. You know this is true because you witnessed it.

Now you can have compassion for that person (being careful not to self-righteously judge or demean) understanding that we are all just doing the best we can with what we have,

The practice of tolerance is the moral high road, and it does not come easily because we are trained from birth to practice separation and opposition, whereas tolerance promotes unity and harmony. Tolerance takes practice, but the benefits are more of the qualities in life that you desire.

More love, happiness, wellness, peace of mind, longevity…

Then there are the cases of malicious intent to deceive or harm you directly, these are really quite rare and might be associated with someone who is potentially a psychopath or sociopath, but that’s a different story.

What approach are you likely to take the next time you feel like shouting, “I’m pissed off?”

Redemption for Passion

If you’re like me, a very passionate person who has a tendency to put your all into something, every once and a while, you might take the time to stop. Look around, and wonder how you got here.

Sometimes your passion can lead you to places you never expected or intended to be. Not to worry there is redemption waiting for you. You are loved and accepted just as you are, and much of the good work which was accomplished during your tenure would not have come to pass were it not for you and your unbridled passion.

Therefore, it’s important to get a grip on your purpose, message, passion, and mission (PMPM) because knowing who you are and what you’re here for can help to keep you focused enough to navigate and maximize your life’s journey.

If you’ve discovered and embraced your gifts and special abilities, you find yourself being far more productive in certain scenarios in life and you ‘re attracting more and more opportunities to let your gifts and abilities to shine.

As more and more people become aware of your special abilities they are more apt to call on you, even feel as though they are somewhat dependent on you. When you are in tune with your inner guidance system, you are aware when the need of your special abilities has overridden your purpose, message, passion, and mission.

Usually, this awareness that you have been led off-track is accompanied by a feeling of incongruency, which is uncommon when you’re in the flow and momentum of doing what you do best because when you’re in the vibration of performing your special abilities it’s easy to get lost in your passion.

This can be incredibly complicated in the business community when others who feel as if their organizations or businesses cannot survive without your special skills and abilities. Occasionally, you may find yourself distracted by a variety of means, anything from love and affection to more and more cold hard cash. But your mission is not for sale, as you are more committed to be true to yourself.

There is also an important balance for you to maintain your own self-care to increase your personal power and ability to deliver and perform at your highest and best. All this needs to be balanced and held in perspective when you ask someone, “How can I help you?”

Nonetheless, once you’ve discovered that you’ve run off course, there is no shame in renegotiating or withdrawal from your over-committing. Of course, you need to exercise diligence in the recalibration, separation, or cutting-back to manage the renegotiation or resignation with as much dignity and grace as possible.

But if things have certainly gotten out of control, you must look after yourself first, in honor of the long-term effects this will have on your ministry on a larger scale. If you must make an abrupt change, you must do what you must do to preserve your ability to serve on a greater scale.

You need to be able to charge and re-charge your own energetic system so that you can serve from a cup which is full and overflowing. This is you delivering, serving, and working and a performance level which is your highest and best.

So, if your passion gets the best of you and leads you off-track, there is redemption for you. Take the time and make the effort to reposition yourself to maximize your potential while remaining true to your calling.

How Can I Help You?

For those of us in the help industry often lead with the question, “How can I help you?” If it is not just your job but your calling to help others, you will find yourself helping everyone, all the time, which if you let it get the best of you, will find yourself in burnout.

Helping others is a spiritual calling, one of the spiritual gifts (1 Corinthians 12:28) which unless you have the servant’s heart, your offer to help will only be regarded as a job. If you have the gift of helps your drive to help and your efficacy in helping far surpasses your contemporaries, and it’s easy to get lost in the exercising of your gift of helps.

Any endeavor you are incredibly passionate about can get the best of you. You want to do your best, but in order to do so you need to give from the best of you. This is far different from giving all you’ve got until there’s nothing of you left.

In my mission, “Helping others achieve their highest and best,” the word, “helping” is right at the beginning of the darn thing. Believe me, I’ve let this helping consume me so much, that there was nothing left, and it is terribly apparent, if you allow your calling to overwhelm you, you will find yourself at the most desolate place in life.

You want to offer your assistance to others with the best intentions when you ask, “How can I help you?” When people or organizations accept your offer of help and have benefitted from your assistance, they can become obsessed with your ability to serve them. This is where you, as the helper, need to be responsible enough to manage their need in respect of your desire to help (not your ability to help).

When, “How can I help you,” turns into someone’s assertion, “I need you to help me,” makes you feel good as if you are accomplishing your mission and being true to your calling, unless or until your helping has fallen out of balance.

For me to help someone achieve their highest and best, I could give and give and give even more, without regard to my self-maintenance (and I have found myself in this situation, periodically). At some point, you awake from the momentum of enthusiastic helping with a moment of clarity in the realization that you’re in need of a little (or a lot of) self-attention.

What you do at this moment of clarity makes all the difference. You can say, “I made a commitment, and I must follow-through because I gave my word,” and let your integrity take you to an early grave, or you could learn how to apply your sacred, “no.”

All things in life are subject to change, so taking action as early as possible to renegotiate the terms of your agreement to help, is of primal importance for the continued performance of your gift of helping others in perpetuity.

Even if your client, organization, or friend protests and in tears and proclaims, “But I need you,” reinforcing with, “I can’t do this without you!” you are about to allow a miracle to take place.

Your ego might step forward and assert that there is no other way for this work to continue without you, as if you were not to continue to perform your function, all your work will crumble to the ground and fail. Recognize this and keep your ego in check.

Understanding that telling someone, “no,” is a sacred act on your part which offers the person you’re politely adjusting to experience a secret, “yes.” They are not aware of the secret yes at the outset, because they may experience a feeling of rejection. Yet, the secret is that there is an amazing opportunity waiting to emerge on the other side of every no.

In this way, your sacred no ushers in growth and expansion which desires to be brought forth. Every sacred no is a secret yes.

The whole universe desires to see all the goodness be born through the work you have begun and momentum you have helped to build. When you start to withdraw from a project, it allows others to step into their gifts and special abilities.

In this moment, they are able to overcome their inner fear and obstacles because their inner hero is being called forth. Thank God, you were able to allow this to be birthed. In this way, you have encouraged someone else to embrace their gifts and special abilities to rise to achieve their highest and best.

Your sacred no helps you to maintain your high level of performance and has helped to make the world a better place.

Try it and see what happens.

Never stop inviting others with your, “How can I help you?” Just be aware that you need to serve by being true to yourself and to share from your overwhelming love and care of yourself.

Thank you for all you do to help others and make the world a better place.

No Matter What You Say No Matter What You Do

With all this talk about love, growing and expanding in love, raising your love vibration, and unconditional love, you might find it difficult to say (think and feel), “I love you no matter what you say. No matter what you do.”

 

It seems like the idea of no matter what you say no matter what you do is a far stretch from reality. No one would blame you if you thought it was impossible or beyond belief that anyone could say such a thing without lying or being deceptive. Yet, there are times when you, yourself, are likely to have loved to that degree.

If you think about it, you have probably held a newborn baby or a new puppy in your arms, and in that moment as you look into the eyes of that baby or puppy, it’s easy to say, think and/or feel, “I love you no matter what you say. No matter what you do.”

Even though you came into this life as a baby who was unconditionally loveable and unconditionally loving, fascinated by and loving everyone and everything no matter what, you were raised, reared, and reprogrammed to love conditionally.

Then later in life, very possibly right now, you are awakening to or intrigued by, the idea of there being such a thing as unconditional love. You might be wondering why no one seems to be able to love you no matter what you say no matter what you do. And while you can love somebody so much, “no matter what,” seems like just too much to ask due to your social programming or personal beliefs.

Understand there is no wrong way or right way to love. We all love the best we can and if you do not have much love for yourself, you will not have a well of love to draw from within to share with others. Loving the best you can is the best you can do and you are blessed to have any love at all, no matter how small.

The unlimited unconditional love of God is infinite and all around you. This infinite unconditional love permeates every cell of your body. Do not panic if the idea of all life and you being made of and animated by unconditional love. Just keep your mind open enough to consider if there was no love in you, your body would fall to the floor, lifeless.

You are unconditional love, though you have been conditioned by family, friends, and society to believe that love is an elusive energy which exists outside of yourself, if it exists at all. This sets the scenario where true love, if you haven’t given up on it altogether, can only be found in some other person. Disney and Hollywood have helped shore up this idea.

In your search for love, you doubtlessly have discovered that love (the love you have been taught to seek) is not what it’s cracked up to be and your experience has led you to believe love is misleading, dishonest, painful, and not worth it, at least not for long. Your experiences in love can reinforce a negative perspective in relation to this idea of love, and you may come to the conclusion, “There is no such thing as love.”

If you would like to be loved no matter what you say no matter what you do, then you must ignite the flame of unconditional love which is within you, and turn it to and focus it upon yourself.

Up until now, you have probably been your own worst enemy, second-guessing and berating yourself, seeing yourself as a victim of life. Not if you love yourself unconditionally.

If you want to love or be loved unconditionally, you must love yourself no matter what you say no matter what you do first.

When you love yourself no matter what you say no matter what you do, you can then share your love as it overflows from you and to those who you love and the world all around you, unconditionally.

I know it’s a stretch because you’ve been trained to believe that no one can be trusted, but in the vibration of unconditional love, trust doesn’t matter.

In your conditional state of love, you think, “But what if…?”

In unconditional love there is no what if; there is only I love you no matter what you say no matter what you do.

If you are not ready to conceive of the idea of unconditional love, there is no judgment, you are not doing it wrong. Just find a way to love the best way you can, for love is really the only pure energy which permeates all of life. Find it. Get it and give it any way you can.

Here, you are loved no matter what you say no matter what you do.

If You Want It You Can Have It

If You Want It You Can Have It

Yes, if you want it, you can have it. Sounds crazy, right? You might say, “I want it, but it’s not here. So, that must not be true.” Totally understandable, but the truth remains that once you have the pure desire in your heart with love’s vibration for something, God sets it aside for you. Once you’ve felt the desire in your heart, it is done. All you have to do is to get from where you were when you had the thought to where what you want is. So, it is true; if you want it, you can have it.

Of course, there are many ways you can have what you want. You could, and many have, get what you want by defrauding someone else, deception, theft, or any other nefarious degrees of compromising your morals. That’s one approach to getting what you want, and you will find the people who choose this approach either living lavishly, in prison, and/or in fear of going to prison.

For those who are in prison, most of them think it’s a small price to pay for getting what they want, when they want it, most of the time, a minor inconvenience, or a part of life.

The good news is, you don’t have to compromise yourself or sell your soul to the devil to get what you want. God wants you to have the desires of your heart, and the work is done the moment you ask for it, “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.” (Matthew 7:7).

Really, all I have to do is ask and I can have it?

Yes. Although, you can’t always have it instantly. You must be a vibrational match to what you want for it to be manifest in your life if you want all of creation to conspire to bring it to you, no matter what it is.

It can be anything that you want, food, shelter, clothing, love, passion, abundance, babies, the most exquisite material things, anything, whatever you want, ask for it and it is yours.

It’s up to you whether you compromise yourself or allow the energy of life to present it to you. You can bring it to pass using your best efforts, or ignore it altogether and resign your life to one of lack, living without all the good things in life that God wants you to have.

You deserve the best things in life, and you don’t have to lie, cheat, or steal to have everything you want.

If this idea sounds unfathomable to you, if you think about it,

Aren’t there people in the world who have all the best things in life?

How do you think they got that kind of life?

They (or their parents) followed the ancient principles of life which brings all the energies of all the power of the universe to give them what they want, or they did it at the expense of others, or made it come to pass by force.

I encourage you to consider taking the high road of manifestation and abundance via the power of love following the law of attraction because if you want it, you can have it.

There is so much blessing, goodness, health, abundance, high quality of life, and wealth waiting for you.

What is your heart’s desire?

If you want it, you can have it.

Where Did I Go Wrong?

When you’re traveling your road in this life it’s easy to get distracted by your missteps and get stuck in the rut of asking yourself, “Where did I go wrong?” which would otherwise be a perfectly healthy question to ask.

Just like when you’re drive tire gets stuck in the mud, if you spin your wheels trying to get out, all it does is bury your tire deeper in the rut, the same goes for ruminating and going over the details of any mistake in life, repeatedly. Keep doing that and you’ll get stuck there, unable to get out and move on in life.

Okay, so you made a mistake, were blindsided, or sucker-punched by life. You can’t just ignore the fact this happened to you. You should review the situation and circumstances that lead to the unexpected event and extract the learnings from experience. For that is the purpose of all life’s challenges. Inside each challenge is a hidden treasure, a divine piece of wisdom which is a key to your continued personal growth, wisdom, and evolution.

How to effectively review when asking yourself,

Where did I go wrong?

Just like when you get stuck in a rut, in most cases, you can rock yourself out. That is to say you can exert energy in one direction, release the pressure and relax to let momentum take you in an opposite direction, then when the momentum starts in the other direction, exert additional energy, then release and relax again.

Exerting energy in a particular direction means asking the tough questions. Were you aware enough about your surroundings? Could you have been more attentive? Are there things you could have done, attending to details, which could have resulted in a more favorable outcome? Were there precautions you could have taken?

Don’t just review this in your head, get it down on paper. Moving the energy from your heart to your brain, letting it flow down your arm, out your fingers, through the ink in your pen and onto the paper, helps to get it out.

Depending on the condition of your rut, this may be enough energy, that when released (written on paper) and relaxed, may be enough to get you over the edge and ready to face life full on again.

If not, you will have to exert even more energy, when you feel your momentum slumping back toward the negativity of the event again. If so, then this time you will have to be a little harder on yourself, to build up a little more negative momentum.

This time, you have permission to berate yourself. You can totally and disrespectfully rant on yourself, using any disrespectful thoughts or language which otherwise would be extremely inappropriate for up to three minutes (set the egg timer) maximum. Then release and relax.

Rock your experience as often as necessary without getting stuck there. Do not overthink this unnecessarily or allow yourself to fall into the paralysis of analysis.

If you are unable to rock yourself out of the rut on your own, you may need a wench, or a tow truck to drag you out.

Don’t be shy about reaching out for third-party assistance. That’s why coaches, counselors, and consultants are there, for you to call on in times of crisis, when you’re unable get out of the rut and get back on track.

Remember, when you’re asking yourself,

Where did I go wrong?

Do a bit of analysis, extract the hidden treasure (the lesson), and move on.

Whatever you do, make sure you get out of the rut. Release this experience, walk away from it, and let it go.

Take a look around you.

Look for all the people who have encountered an unexpected life event and let it get the best of them… I think we can all agree that there must be a better way.

You don’t want to let this thing cripple your potential over a long period of time. Rock yourself out, or get help to get you over this thing that’s troubling you.

There is so much waiting for you just over the horizon, a better life. Your best life awaits you, and this experience imbues you with the wherewithal to help make the world a better place.

You are amazing.

Live Your Life

You have this one life to live and you can choose to live your life, full on, as your own, or you can life your life as defined by someone or something else, like a good little human. (I humbly apologize for the sarcastic overtones.)

You came to this planet to live your life, to do so in such an individualistic and magnificent way. Along with you, you brought certain talents, gifts, and special abilities, all to support your purpose and to enable you to best sing your song. Not that your song might be a melody to be sung with your voice, but more like your unique message to be shared by you will have an extraordinary perspective, look and feel, unique to you.

There are forces which abound on this planet which would like to eliminate the inkling of a thought which you might entertain about having anything of significance to contribute to the world. So, they start programming you via social engineering to stamp out any hope of remembering your life’s purpose.

This programming is so effective, that your parents, caretakers, teachers, coworkers, family, and friends, are all under the spell of the powers that want to control you, and they are all trying to prevent your authentic, inspired self from emerging and making an impact. Of course, all this effort is heart-felt concern, as if to be looking out for your best interests.

You can’t really fault or blame people for exerting their beliefs in an effort to “save you from yourself” because they love you, and they so sincerely believe their efforts to prevent you from being who you really are will save you from pain, suffering, and utter disaster.

Live Your Life

The real you, the you that you were sent to this planet to be, is aching to be acknowledged and released. You hear that still small inner voice, that resides in the deepest part of you praying that you will be able to hear it among all the noise. It is sometimes so very hard to hear because it is buried so far beneath the loud inner voice of ego, which is easy to be manipulated and programmed by the powers and their social engineering.

And if that weren’t enough, your conscious mind is under constant attack of a barrage of distracting details, data, media, drama, and trauma, that you couldn’t find a gap in the space quiet enough to hear the voice of your true inner self.

Yet, you know it is there. You can feel it.

Even with all the efforts, supported by all the money and power in the world to suppress the real you, you know there is more to this life than what you’ve been allowed to think of or believe in. And apart of you longs to

Live Your Life

If you really want to live your life authentically and be true to yourself, you might consider creating some sacred space for you to tune in to who you really are. Getting in touch with you, “the you” you were meant to be, will take separation from the things in life which have been placed there to distract you and keep you in a state of trance, or panic.

Your feelings easily distract you, so find ways to reduce or eliminate (at least momentarily) any of the things in life that make you feel bad. Anything that makes you feel angry or sad, find ways to get these things out of your life, at least in the beginning. Later, once you are able to identify and connect with your true inner self, then you can find ways to disempower anything that might try to distract you from your purpose, message, passion, and/or mission (pmpm).

Don’t settle for mediocrity. Make a concerted effort to disassociate yourself from the mediocre life you’ve been programmed to accept for yourself. Take a look at all the programming which you have subjected yourself to which may not be supporting your authentic self. Things like bad habits which may not serve you, but are so effective at distracting you from the authentic frequency and vibration of the real you, that you may have physiological connections or dependency on these substances and/or activities keeping you even more separated from who you really are.

Now is the time to make some clean and pure psychological and physiological space for you to enable you to authentically connect to the real you, allowing you to truly live your life in a genuinely empowered and effective life, free from the social engineering and powers which desire your blind subservience.

As you learn more about what you really want in life, know this is your birthright. All the things you desire (when free from the programming, and some which you were drawn to while under the influence of the programming) are yours to be enjoyed in this lifetime. These desires would not have been placed in your heart of hearts, endearing you to them, if you were not called to enjoy them in their fullness.

All these things are waiting for you to have them and frolic fully in the joy of possessing them and/or living in the energy of them. It is on you to close the gap between where you ware and where you want to be, between what you have now and what you want to have.

Since all you want, and have ever wanted, has already been provided for you, all you have to do to close the gap is to align yourself with what you want and to remove anything which is blocking you from seeing it or having it. When nothing stands between you and what you want, and you are in the vibration of whatever it is, you find yourself in the fullness of it.

Doing a little something-something every day moves you closer and closer to what you want, enabling you to live your life authentically and abundantly.

Ask yourself, “Who am I?” Who can I be? Who have I been called to be and what is my message?

Only you can discover the answers to these questions for yourself.

Be open and prepared for evolutionary changes within yourself, which will affect not only you, but the world around you.

This is your life. Start living your own life today.