March, 2018 | David M Masters

Depression Is a Good Thing

Depression gets a bad rap because it can be so all-consuming and overpowering. If you give in to it and let depression take you over, it could destroy you. You could lose all desire to go on and even contemplate suicide. Depression is debilitating, can be horrible and all the while, depression is a good thing.

Depression is hard to go through and in our contemporary society, we do everything we can to avoid it or stave off the effects of depression. We self-medicate or reach out for prescription medications to keep us from feeling bad and this works to some degree. It makes us numb to the effects of depression, and we feel better.

We know, that the approach of self-numbing without some attention being paid to the underlying causes of the depression is counter-productive, now that we have statistical data to look back on to evaluate the lack of success due to the “ignore it for long enough and it will go away,” approach to dealing with the feelings associated with depression.

Creating a false sense of wellness is not good medicine.

We now realize that creating a false sense of wellness and not dealing with the issues related to the causal factors of depression is not good medicine.

And while we’ve been spending all this time focusing on tweaking the brain’s chemistry to make people feel better, we’ve missed the point completely:

Depression is a Good Thing

Why do you think you get depressed?

You get depressed because something’s not right, and when something’s wrong, it needs some attention.

Depression is like the Check Engine light on your car.

Sure, you can still drive your car with the Check Engine light on, so what’s the worry? You can ignore it, even put tape over it and pretend it’s not even lighted at all.

If you ignore it, your car will fail. Left unchecked, your car could be reduced to 3,000 pounds of useless equipment on the side of the road.

Depression is God’s gift to the humanity, a sort of check engine light, alerting your consciousness in a profound way that things need to change.

Just like the check engine light, when you become aware of depression, at your earliest convenience, you would be well-advised to take your vehicle (body) into the shop to at the very least run diagnostics to see what might be amiss.

Depending on the cause of the depression (check engine light) you may not need to take immediate action. You may be able to continue to operate your vehicle unimpeded for a while, while you make plans for dealing with the underlying issues causing the fix engine light (depression) to catch your attention.

You might be able to spray something here, dab something there, or pour a little something in the gas tank, while you’re figuring out what approach you’re going to take to resolve the issue, but this is only temporary. If you do not deal with the cause of the indication of the need for repair, replacement, or radical change, you will be left with a situation which may be far worse, possibly altogether unrepairable.

Depression is a Good Thing

While it is uncomfortable and painful, depression is alerting you that something needs to be done to change your life for the better.

Don’t be shy about getting third-party assistance in seeing what’s wrong because often we are unable to see what’s going on under the hood. Check with a trusted friend or seek out a therapist, coach, counselor, or member of the clergy to reach out to for a more in-depth diagnostic.

The good news is, on the other side of the depression, if you’ve tended to the reason for the depression and made the necessary life-changes, a brighter, more meaningful life of love and happiness awaits you.

Once you’ve dealt with and resolved your depressive issues, you can start to live a better life, your best life, and make the world a better place.

So, the next time you get depressed, don’t run to the “drug store” to numb the feeling. Instead, consider drilling down into your soul to see if you can figure out what repairs, replacements, or radical changes need to be made. Massive change will make you feel much better than any form of self-medication. Plus, it will raise your vibration and change the direction if your life, creating a whole new world of possibilities.

Your new, more expanded and evolved, life is waiting for you.

Devastated by Your Lover

When you’ve loved so deeply and survived the most chaotic and destructive relationship leaving you feeling helpless, lost, and potentially suicidal, thank God for being devastated by your lover because you are being prepared for the best love ever. When a love has all but destroyed you, your greatest love is very near and is yours to embrace, if you do not turn away from it.

Love is a process of growth. If you were open, vulnerable, and loved so deeply that you could be reduced to a smoldering pile of ash in the wake of a relationship’s end, the truest, greatest love of your life is not far off, though you must move from where you are to where your highest and best love is. If you stay where you are, there will be another tragic love waiting for you to continue your preparation process.

How often will you have to repeat this cycle until you realize that your path to true love is in a different direction from where you’re currently headed. Continuing to traverse in the direction you’re currently going, will only yield more of the same because you’re on Love’s Train Wreck Road.

When you’re face-down in the rubble of a relationship where you have been devastated by your lover, hopefully, you start looking for a way to get off LTW Road.

Granted, you’re feeling unwell, and can barely move, and maybe all you can do is to roll your body off of the road and into the ditch, where you can gather yourself and figure out a way to get off this road.

If someone drives by and offers you a ride to the hospital, this sounds like a good thing when you’ve been beaten and bruised, lying in the ditch. You overlook your rescuer’s rugged appearance, and otherwise repulsive characteristics because in this moment, you feel as though this person is an angel of God.

So, you get into his (or her) truck and you get taken to a cabin in the woods, not a hospital. Still, on Love’s Train Wreck Road, your feeling of relief is interrupted by the idea that this is starting to look more like a horror film, instead of a romantic movie.

You can see (or feel) a blinking yellow light on the dashboard, “Service Engine Soon,” and this is that still small voice speaking directly to your heart.

Stop the insanity, get off this road and find your own way to service your love engine.

The fact that your love relationships are not working out right is a clear indication that you are not doing it right. You must find a way to get off the road you are on and do it differently if you want different results.

I know you’ve heard this before,

The Greatest and Truest Love Starts with You

You are quick to disregard such a trite statement with, “Yeah, I know that. I love myself. Leave me alone. I got this.”

(Uh oh, the three words that cut off the source of all future awareness: “I know that.”)

Do you?

Clearly, you do not.

Finding the wellspring of love within yourself is not as easy as it sounds, because it is such a powerful treasure trove of energetic power, that tapping into it not only changes your life, but the world.

You have been programmed to disregard this powerful source of love energy, which not only causes your heart to beat and your mind to think, but also holds the stars in space, and you have a direct connection to this power within yourself.

That’s the purpose of my Awaken to True Love Workshop. It’s helping people plug into the love source of all life and everything. (There are many paths to awaken to true love, this workshop is just one of them.)

Once you tap into this source, honor and love yourself deeply, your life and the whole universe shifts, and love, true love is the life you live.

Then, you do not find your love in another person, but a person who is perfectly matched to you (along with his or her imperfections) appears, willing and able to reflect this new love energy back to you.

Together, the flame of your love experience influences and warms the hearts of others, affecting and changing the vibratory state of your community and makes the world a better place.

And you’ll never find yourself devastated by your lover again because you will never find yourself on LTW Road again.

If you decide to do it differently.

Are to ready to Awaken to True Love?

See you at the Soulmate Wizardry event.

Pursue Your Purpose

Finding your purpose can be scary business. As much as those of us in the discovering your special purpose business would like to reduce it to a particular formula, since everyone is different, the layers that need to be peeled away to uncover your purpose are different, the depth of the layers of programming vary so widely, it just cannot be reduced to a series of checkboxes and processing of a form. (Though many of us have tried.)

There are some similarities among those who are seeking to uncover their life’s calling, and you might be surprised to find out where some of the stones are where missions are buried beneath. Think about looking for the answers you’re looking for under these stones:

Fear

What are you afraid of? In many cases, the struggle you have with a particular fear holds the keys to your life’s purpose. It may not be the endgame, but certainly, those things that frighten you, are generally an indication that what you fear and the overcoming of it is either your calling or your purpose and mission lies on the other side of what you fear.

If you have a pervasive fear of failure challenge about a particular activity or endeavor, this is a priceless clue. If people have approached you about doing a particular thing, and you thought to yourself, “I could never do that,” because you felt as though you were unable or unqualified to do it, that’s a pretty good indication that this challenge is an invitation to lead you to your purpose.

Serve Those You Admire

There are those people whom you come into contact with or become aware of that inspire you. You resonate with their calling, you get excited when they step up and express their life’s purpose.

Seek to support or serve those whom you admire, by assisting them (you don’t even need their permission, you could support them via positive social media support, or leaving positive comments on their posts, referring others to investigate their work, etc.) you acquire their positive vibration.

The more you align yourself with the people who are actively engaged in doing their thing, you get exposed and used to the idea that you could/should be following your path to your destiny.

As you start to raise your own personal vibration in congruence with your purpose, you may notice that your desire to spend time with people who are not supportive of your pursuing your mission with passion are dragging you down. There are those who just seem to drain the life out of you when they are around, we call these people emotional vampires. It might be time to restructure your social matrix, surrounding yourself with more supportive, positive people.

Your Greatest Challenge

That insurmountable person, circumstance, or thing that you just cannot get beyond. The constant irritation that keeps popping up in your life, over and over again; that thing that makes you feel helpless and hopeless… That’s God holding you in a loving headlock, tapping on your head with a heartfelt noogie and a silly smile, saying, “Hello?”

How many times do you have to be presented with this particular challenge before you take the steps to overcome it? It is highly probable, this is your purpose, to overcome this challenge and possibly be the inspiration for others who struggle with the same issues(s) in life.

Is There More?

These things which frighten you, the people who inspire you, the challenges and obstacles that feel insurmountable, either are your special purpose or point the way to your purpose, so don’t be intimidated about looking at what’s next?

Also keep in mind that you may have more than one special purpose, if you are a very special person with an impressive destiny.

If your impassionate mission is multi-faceted, the caveat is to not spread yourself too thin, or you may have to prevent yourself from being drawn away from your own purpose in the support of someone else’s mission.

The process of discovery consists of asking questions and taking steps, one at a time, then asking yourself a “Yes” or “No” question. “Am I on the right track?”

“Do I feel like I’m headed in the right direction?”

If the answer is, “No,” re-evaluate and try something different. If it’s “Yes,” keep going.

Being Open and Available

There are people who are on the fringe of your business, people who are acquaintances, those who are prospective clients, clients and associates, and if you think of these categorically as concentric circles of, at the center are your lifelong clients and friends. The goal would be to continually invite people into the next level of your business relationship.

To do this you must be available. Create a method of communication which may be accessed anytime your prospective client might need to get ahold of you. This is fairly easy to manage in this digital age, and/or with a virtual assistant.

You don’t necessarily have to be available 24/7 but your communication method does need to be available, so at least they can send you an email, text, or leave a voicemail.

In order for this to have any hope or working, you do need to reply as soon as possible. The highest success rates for converting prospects to clients comes from live interaction in the moment of contact. If this is not part of your marketing paradigm then make sure your people know that if they leave a message you will get back to them as soon as you can and do it, remembering that the longer it takes you to return the call, the more likely that your prospect will go elsewhere.

Before you meet with a prospective client, acquaint yourself with his or her business, and personality, so that you can have some idea about how to best communicate, relate, and help them. Fortunately, this is much easier in this day and age due to most everyone having a web presence and social media activity.

When you meet with a prospective client be sure to show them your best stuff. Leave them with something of value, a tip, secret, tool, technique, something that builds their confidence in your ability to be their go-to man or woman. You have skills, skills that they need. Make it easy for him or her to think of you in their hour of need.

Adjust your business model to not be a one-shot deal with your clients, building long-term business relationships over time, with regular consistency reduces your marketing expenses and increases your profitability over time. Make your business model all about repeat business, ‘ere the importance of keeping the door open over time.

Let them know that you will be contacting them in the future and make sure that you follow up. Remain in your prospect’s conscious awareness. People are different and prefer to be contacted in different ways. Try to reach out live and in person. If your potential client is unresponsive, find better ways to keep the lines of communication open, such as texts, emails, message chats, etc.

Out of sight, equates to out of mind, and if you’re not reaching out to your clients, they are unlikely to reach out to you in their hour of need,

Once you’ve met with your client or prospective client, you want to leave the meeting in such a way to be open and inviting to avail yourself to continue to do business or build a relationship with your people.

Following your meeting, recap what you have discussed. This lets them know you’ve been attentive and care about their needs or concerns, and this review can also achieve a greater degree of clarity, as they refine their assertions, or clear up any misunderstanding you may have had during the meeting.

A follow-up email is an excellent way to document the meeting and create a hard copy of the meeting which can easily be accessed by either of you in the future.

How to Live Your Life

Everyone always thinks they know what’s best for you, and though they think they have your best interests at heart, they all have their opinions about how to live your life. Only thing is, they are not you and, therefore, are not qualified to tell you how to live your life at all.

Your journey is your journey. No one has lived a life like yours, though some other people’s lives may have shared similar experiences. You may even have shared the same experiences with others, but your individual experiences can be (and generally are) completely different because you are different people.

No one has the right to tell you how to live your life; only you can decide how you will live your life.

You can choose to take direction or advice from others, and if you are wise you can avoid the pitfalls suffered by others by observing how they have executed decisions which they could have done better. Using your sense of reason and skills of observation will help in your deciding how you will navigate your life’s journey for yourself.

We’ve been trained from birth to care about what other people think of us, and desire to be accepted in the eyes, minds, and heart of others, so we find ourselves trying to please others and tend to make adjustments in our lives to accommodate the other people in our world.

In many cases, we are frightened about what other people might think about us and are inhibited by the idea of exerting our independence because we want to please others or desire to be accepted/admired by others.

How to Live Your Life

Exerting your independence does not mean isolating yourself from the rest of the population (unless you decide to do so). Certainly, you should do your best to learn from others and listen to what they have to say, but at the end of the day, how you decide to accept or apply any of the information you have been exposed to is up to you.

And no one has the right to judge you for how you live your life or what you choose to believe, as long as it doesn’t infringe on the rights of others.

Be fiercely independent, fully exercise your freedoms, offer others the same courtesy, and do no harm.

Of course, there is the common-sense factor. It behooves you to be cognizant of the world around you as you exercise your independence. There are laws that have been structured to control your behavior.

Find ways to exercise your independence within the parameters society has set forth, unless you’ve decided that breaking the law is necessary for your executing your independent beliefs, then be prepared to accept the consequences of your decisions.

All decisions have consequences.

This is the only caveat: Do not hurt anyone or impose your beliefs on others. That’s it.

In my life, some of my personal tenets include,

Edify others.

Love and live your life and do no harm.

Let go of perfection, except in honor of its imperfection, for no one is perfect (especially not me).

Try to see from someone else’s perspective because, after all, we’re all only doing the best we can with what we have.

Love and respect others as you love and accept yourself, or honor and treat others as you would like to be treated.

Some positive quotes from others who assert your right to live your own life include:

“Only you can control your future.” ~ Dr. Seuss

“You can influence, direct and control your own environment. You can make your life what you want it to be.” ~ Napoleon Hill

“Control your thoughts. Decide about that which you will think and concentrate upon. You are in charge of your life to the degree you take charge of your thoughts.” ~ Earl Nightingale

“Take control of your consistent emotions and begin to consciously and deliberately reshape your daily experience of life.” ~ Tony Robbins

“You only have control over three things in your life – the thoughts you think, the images you visualize, and the actions you take.” ~ Jack Canfield

Food for thought to inspire your own thoughts.

What Are You Hiding?

I have had the privilege of having people confide in me, telling me their deepest, darkest secrets. I know what the “official story” is about a great many things, and I have heard the truth behind the headlines directly from the sources. I have also been massively deceived by a sociopath, the greatest keeper of secrets, only to find out the truth at great expense.

One particular psychopath with whom I’d become acquainted with who was referred to by prosecutors as inherently evil and claimed himself to be a pathological liar could wield lies like his identifying superpower. With a keen ability to defraud, counterfeit, and masquerade, he enjoyed false careers as everything from an airline pilot, attorney, mental health counselor, therapist, investment banker, real estate, precious metals, and Wall Street broker, just to name a few.

The psychopath was the embodiment of the phrase, “If his lips are moving, he’s lying,” (according to one Chief Investigator) as he committed a wide variety of crimes while bilking unsuspecting widows, and vulnerable adults, among a long list of other types of victims, left wounded, alone, and penniless. Lying, he claimed, was his form of exercising his First Amendment right to free speech, which he was entitled to by constitutional law.

Being proficient at lying is not relegated to narcissists, sociopaths, psychopaths, pathological liars, or evil people.

As much as we’d like to say, “I could never lie, like that,” the truth is all of us, including you and me, lie all day long, every day of our lives, albeit without any malicious intent.

What are you hiding?

You are deceptive, hide the truth, and lie every day; we all do. It’s a standard human basic survival skill.

You’ve learned from a very early age, generally two years old, that telling the truth does not serve your best interests. It usually starts with you being sent to your room or otherwise punished by a parent (or parental figure) for honestly fessing up to something that your parent(s) disapproved of. So, you learned to lie and have perfected the craft over time.

You learned to lie (just like we all did) to avoid punishment, disapproval, or pain, and to make life easier to manage, to make friends, to advance in careers or society, and to be attractive to others, especially romantic partners. Leaving you wondering why lovers lie?

Other reasons for lying include getting what you want, to be recognized, establish and maintain an image, to garner attention or sympathy, and to find out if someone else is lying or trustworthy.

No matter how much you know someone, how close you are to anyone, you can’t tell what’s going on inside someone else’s head, it’s just not possible. Just like no one can tell what’s going on inside your head, and you do the best you can to present yourself as the person you believe yourself to be, even if it means lying.

Those of us who might be on the autism spectrum are probably the worst liars (by that, I mean, not very believable when lying and lie the least), but the rest of us are fairly competent at lying.

The fact is, the whole world, the three-dimensional world that we all inhabit, is entirely an illusion of belief systems which are hardly based on truth, but on lies, we’re programmed to believe as truths, and we believe them so much, that we would defend them with our lives.

If we live, we live a lie to the best of our abilities, where we are surrounded by lies, but most of us do it with the best intentions.

It’s Like a Death

We get so attached to our expectations that when things do not turn out the way we’d planned or expected, the results can be traumatic, which can come at great emotional expense due to the experience. It’s like a death.

Just as if your dream or expectation mean just as much to you as a loved one, and when it all comes crashing down (and there is no longer any expectation of turning out like you had planned) then you’re left with all the conditions of grief, just as if someone you loved dearly suddenly died.

We tend to attach everything we are to particular expectations in all kinds of things.

You get psychologically and physiologically attached to everything that you “put your whole heart into.”

The object of your attachment could be anything from a friendship, romantic relationship, material things, spiritual matters, investments, educational or entrepreneurial plans. Really, you can get your heart connected and deeply attached to just about anything, if you have a pumping heart and a thinking brain.

If you’ve loved (been deeply connected to) anyone or anything and you have lost any hope of your expectations coming to fruition about it, you are entitled to your grief. And just as if someone you loved had suddenly died, no one can tell you how to grieve, or how long your grief will endure.

There are some patterns associated with people who are grieving and by looking at how others have successfully (and unsuccessfully) dealt with grief, we can learn better ways to approach to dealing with the grieving process.

The first caveat that can be generally accepted is to avoid trying to replace the object of your affection before you have completed your grieving process. Very little, if any good can come from prematurely jumping onto another like situation, prior to finding a mentally healthy place to approach something new.

If there’s anything we’ve learned from the past, it’s that moving on too soon will only find us smack dab in the middle of all this drama all over again. No one wants that, though it is something we can learn the easy way or the hard way.

So, allow yourself to take as long as it takes to go through the 7 phases of grief.

Briefly, the 7 phases of grief are,

1. Freaking Out

Your world has just been turned upside down, and you did not see this coming. You cannot believe that this thing did not work out like you had planned. You did your best to do everything right to ensure your success. Yet, here you are, all your hopes and dreams destroyed as you can clearly see the rubble. Of course, you’re going to freak out, and no one would blame you because we’d do the same thing, if we were you.

2. Hurt Feelings

There is a great deal of emotional expression that will run the gamut. One minute you will be feeling like the very life is draining out of you, unsure whether you can take another breath, or experience another heartbeat. The pain from your heart spreads throughout your whole body and you find yourself battling depression.

3. Pissed and Pleading

After a time spent dealing with having your feelings hurt to the core and the suffering that comes from that you move into the pissed and pleading phase. You are angry at everything, everyone, whether they were involved or not, and even worse, you get pissed at yourself. You start thinking about what you could have done wrong, or what you could have done better, and while you are fully aware of the unrepairable rubble, you start pleading for a second chance, may even attempt to rebuild something out of sheer will, but you realize at some point you cannot do anything about it. Them, you try to beg, or plead with God for another chance, like Groundhog Day.

4. Brokenness

Breaking, letting yourself crumble to a place where you feel like you are helpless to do anything about what has happened. You resign yourself to deciding that there is life on the other side of this, and now you can re-evaluate and plan for getting better, and if you’re committed to finding a way to move on, you can start to find your new normal.

5. Life Begins to Return

You’re starting to get through the day, one step at a time, and the steps are not quite as difficult as they were in phases 1 through 4. You’re feeling your body, mind, and soul start coming back to life. You are now starting to feel good enough to rebuild a new, more improved version of yourself.

6. Rebuilding a New You

Now you’re back on the path to healthful healing, getting over this particular episode and you start making plans to live a better life by being able to have some increasing clarity on this tragedy. From this vantage point you are able to separate the good from the bad and look to find the lessons and find the hidden treasures, the messages that were only for you, that you could not have been open to or received in any other way, and you find ways to integrate this new awareness into the more evolved version of you.

7. Loving the New You

Your evolution is complete, and you have let go of this thing which you can now leave behind in the past while retaining all that is valuable and/or necessary for the survival of the new you. How do you know you’ve let go? Because you can think about what you lost, and you have no negative feelings associated with it. Loving this new you means you don’t judge yourself for anything that’s happened in the past, you fully love and accept yourself and realize that we’re all just doing the best we can with what we have, and love what is, without judgment.

Anything you’ve been deeply connected with that you have lost is not unlike dealing with the death of a loved one.

If it’s like a death, why not allow yourself to memorialize whatever it is, by honoring it with a ritual, like a funeral. Writing a eulogy might help you to move through the grieving process a little better by honoring that which went before.

Plan on, and allow, yourself to grieve your loss, and don’t let anyone judge you for doing so. It’s like a death, and it’s up to you to look after you so that you can get ready to go on with your life in a more enlightened manner.

How to Deal with Energy Vampires

Ever find yourself drained of all your vital energy when a certain someone is around? An Energy Vampire is a particular type of toxic person, probably somewhat narcissistic, who may have no malicious intent but still sucks the life out of you when he or she is around, leaving you wondering how to deal with energy vampires?

Try to keep in mind that while they are self-absorbed and unconcerned about you, these energy vampires need energy the derive from others to live. Just like you cannot keep an ordinary bloodsucker from parasitically draining the blood from other living beings, there is no way you can rescue, save, cure, or heal an energy vampire. Nonetheless, unless you’re dealing with a sociopath or psychopathic predator, energy vampires are not evil.

Regardless, a person can only take so much, and someone has to take care of you. If no one else is going to look after you, the responsibility lies solely with you. If you intrinsically a very nice person, and you’ve developed a relationship with (albeit somewhat dysfunctional and toxic), you might have second thoughts about abandoning someone that you care about.

How to Deal with Energy Vampires

You can start protecting yourself by limiting your exposure to the energy vampire. Limit the time you spend in his or her presence, fill your life with other pursuits that build your energy rather than draining it, making you less available for exploitation or allowing the energy vampire to continue to suck the life out of you.

Avoid letting the energy vampire draw you into his or her drama. They will tell their tales of always being the victim, they will weave fantastic stories of woe, pain and suffering. And anytime you try to reach out to them, they spin anything you have to say back to their own drama, as you feel the energy drain.

When you are exposed to them, do what you can to remain unemotionally attached to their stories. Don’t let them see you react, as you remain stoic. Any reaction (positive or negative) will supply them with the energy they crave.

If being in the presence of the energy vampire is unavoidable, like at work, or a family affair, if it is a family member, then invite others to participate in the exposure who are not emotional parasites. This will help to stave off the effects of the vampiric influence.

Another effective tactic is to interrupt any negative assertion of the energy vampire with a hugely positive or funny interruption and laugh at your own punchlines. Be strong and do everything you can to keep the energy vibration high. Happiness is the anti-venom of the energy vampire and disarms them every time.

After a while, they will realize that you’ve become bulletproof.

If you’re still unable to mitigate the damages due to the drain of an energy vampire, then it may be time to sever your ties altogether.

Occasionally, in life, we have to make difficult and hard decisions to affect our self-preservation. You might have to cut off any further contact with the energy vampire and make better choices about what people you will surround yourself with.

Cutting off contact with your emotional vampire could be more problematic than you might think. It’s common to develop an empathetic or psychic connection and severing these cords can be uncomfortable and painful. Expect there to be some potential symptoms of Stockholm Syndrome, or Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD).

Sometimes you gotta cut the cords and do what you gotta do to live a better life.

Visualization

When it comes to changing your life, there is no greater tool to utilize when you’re contemplating a major shift in life than visualization.

In case you’re wondering what topic(s) I will write about each day, there really is no preconceived or premeditated program. Whatever comes up that day, either in my life, the life of a client, friend, or family member determines the subject I write about. Like today, I was studying childhood PTSD, reading Julie Valenti’s Knowing How, then followed up with a client who needed some coaching in visualization. So, there you have it.

Visualization is powerful because it helps to “rewire the brain,” as Valenti says. In my practice, visualization followed training in Christian ministry and prayer, Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP), and Hypnotherapy (in that order) and ended up as a progression of these techniques culminating in guided visualization or meditation with concepts of the Law of Attraction thrown in for flavor.

If you have seen Rhonda Byrne’s The Secret, you can get the idea about how to approach the idea of visualization and how it can change life all around you, based on where you focus your attention and practice the feeling of having whatever it is you desire, and it works.

The truth is, my mother told me that I could be whatever I wanted to be, even though very early in life I was non-verbal. I didn’t talk much as a young child, but I could mimic comedy recordings word-for-word and with some degree of enthusiasm. When company would come over, my mother would call me out of my room to put on a performance for the guests. Everyone would laugh, and then I would slink back to hide in my room following my delivery.

This was me exercising visualization by mimicry and pretending, and after a while, I learned communication skills and began to interact verbally with other people. A powerful skill that would come in handy throughout my entire life’s journey, and my mother was right, I could be or do anything. Likewise, you can be or do anything you want.

All it takes is a little visualization, practice, using something we all have been programmed to disregard in adulthood: Imagination. The more powerfully you exercise your imagination muscles and engage your actions, the more powerful your results.

It’s up to you to decide to do the work of using all your powers of imagination to visualize your life, the way you want it to be, bask in the feeling of it being your reality, and act as if it’s the real deal.

The doing of anything is a key component. What you do today determines who you will be.

In the beginning, once you start this effort, it feels ridiculous. You’re thinking this is fakery, and you start to second-guess your efforts with thoughts like, “Who would do such a thing?” followed by a flood of negative self-talk, like, “I’m not good enough,” talented enough, or the other dissuading themes reinforcing your lack of education, resources, finances, abilities, standing in the community, or an endless number of “reasons” justifying your unworthiness.

To combat this onslaught of self-doubt and negativity, you kind’a have to go a little overboard in an attempt to rewire your brain. As a young man, books like Norman Vincent Peale’s Power of Positive Thinking and Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill were resources that helped to encourage my growth and expansion using my imagination to bridge the gap between here and there.

So, you might have to look in the mirror and practice positive affirmations, study the lives of others who have overcome obstacles to achieve the results you are looking for, create vision boards, and remove yourself from any negative influences during your reprogramming phase. Whatever it takes, do that, don’t let anything prevent you for going for it, and when it doesn’t feel real, allow yourself to pretend and fake it until it becomes true for you.

Thanks to my seizing every opportunity to turn every challenge into an opportunity allowed me to have the most tremendous experiences one could ever imagine in this life. In most cases, when facing insurmountable odds, all I had to do was to use my imagination and pretend that I was fully competent to survive and thrive through the adversity, and the Creator of the universe would support me in kind.

Even when it doesn’t make any sense, and it seems impossible, if you go forward in faith, putting yourself in the proper mindset and acting as if you are fully capable and trust that everything you need will appear in just the right time, your brazenness is rewarded by everything falling into place perfectly.

“Perfectly,” is not always the way you imagined it. Sometimes God knows there is something better He has in store for you, so try to be flexible enough to allow the power of love to override your expectations in your best interest.

You got this.