Might as well face it, you’re addicted to fun
You’re obsessed with the feelings associated with pleasure and happiness. You can function while you’re at work, but pretty much all you think about when your mind is not focused on work or problem solving is,
What am I going to do, who can I see, where can I go to get my next happy feeling?
Interestingly, the more difficult your next happy fix is, the higher (happier) it will make you feel. On the other hand, if you’re unable to participate in that difficult scenario, you’re going to feel bad, angry or depressed for not being able to do it.
It’s not enough just to do or have whatever it is that will make you happy; you derive even more pleasure from having it first. Buying the ticket, getting the latest tech gear, fashion bag, or collectible, etc. Getting these things make you happy, but being the first to get it, makes you feel even better.
This applies also to the people in your life. You judge people by how fun they are to be around, how happy they make you feel. The more fun they are, the more apt you are to go to great lengths to keep them around. If they’re a bummer, or a downer, you are less likely to have the time for them.
You love to collect things. If you’ve found owning a particular type of product has made you happy, you’re likely to get more of them, thinking the more you have, the better you’ll feel. This applies to people in your life, as well.
You know what you want, and you want it now. And you will compromise, throw caution to the wind, put relationships at risk, or suffer financial hardship for getting it now, with as little effort as possible.
Want to see where your loyalties are? Check your bank statement. You will find your pursuit of fun clearly indicated on your balance sheet, and might be inclined to rack up credit card debt to have the fun you so desperately desire.
Your moral compass might also be at risk as you try to find less scrupulous, or questionable (if not illegal), methods to finance your need of happiness.
You spend sleepless nights obsessing about the next shiny object, and the thought of it dominates your otherwise idle thoughts throughout your day. You know that if you can get this thing, you will be so happy, but after you get it… it just lacks the shimmer that you thought it would have.
When your latest acquisition does not meet your expectations (make you as happy as you thought it would) you’re going to reject it, put it down, possibly attack yourself (or someone else) for being responsible for your disappointment. You might take it back, demanding a refund. Or try to find a way to recapture the loss of money, time, or make a new (or better) friend who will make you happier than one you might have discarded.
You often compare what you have to what someone else has. You achieve a sense of joy from having something better than someone else, and when you find someone with something even better than you, your happiness about the particular item you have begins to fade.
Everything and everyone that surrounds you in your life supplies you in some way for your need to be happy. If someone, or something, fails to do so, it is quickly discarded.
Fear of loss will find you jumping through hoops, and making sacrifices, to sustain your long-term happiness provided by any activity, person or object. Since you are always concerned with maintaining all the things that make you happy, and little else, you have few resources or energy to devote to more meaningful activities or your loved ones.
You find yourself afraid of boredom. If you are not in a state of happiness, you get anxious because the withdrawal from your state of happiness is depressing, makes you feel like you’re imprisoned, can’t breathe, sad, lonely, or depressed.
You would rather risk all, sacrificing financial strain, loss of support, not following through on social commitments, humiliation, whatever it takes to prevent your dejected state of unhappiness. Your schooling or job may be at risk as the stress of trying to find ways to support your happiness become more elusive. Being unable to live in the now, or focus on the tasks at hand, can result in demotion, poor grades, or exclusion.
Your spiritual quest is one which must also support your need to feel joy and/or a sense of superiority. Your faith may help to mitigate the damages of the sacrifices you’ve made, or losses you’ve suffered in your attempt to maintain your happiness. The idea of making the world a better place appeals to you, but you’re unwilling or unable to do the work necessary to make the difference, but your recognition for supporting others doing the work, can bring a sense of accomplishment, gleaning what credit you can for their efforts.
Your attempt to fill the void with activities, material possessions, food or people will never satisfy, and will always see you wanting more. You will always be in search of the next car, trip, event, phone, gadget, handbag, bobble, restaurant meal, drink, orgasm or ten pound weight loss. And none of it will give you what you’re looking for.
Just as with other addictions, denial seems to be the first order of business as the addict protests with phrases, like, “I’m just enjoying life. What’s wrong with that?” Justifying, with statements, like, “Everyone else does it.” Or claiming not to be a slave to their uncontrollable behavior, by saying, “I can quit whenever I want.”