Live a Better Life Your Best Life

Many of my clients, friends and followers have been asking about when my next book is coming out. Well, finally, here it is.

live-a-better-life-your-best-life-and-make-the-world-a-better-place

It is based on the number one question I get asked on the street. It may come in many forms, but is basically, “How do you live such an amazing life?” followed by, “How can I do that?” Though the second half of the question is more often than not misstated as, “I wish I could do that,” or, “I could never live a life like yours.”

The truth is, you can – anyone can – if you follow the basic ideas contained within this book.

Of course, I could not afford to sit down with each person individually and work with them on their life’s journey, but thanks to your queries and encouragement, I’ve collected these ideas, which I would share with you in person, if we had the opportunity and time to spend together.

My clients are spoiled because they get unfiltered access to me and enjoy the benefits thereof and now you can, too.

If you’d like to live a more amazing life, without having to spend a lot of time and money on professional coaching, this is a great way to get started. So, run out and get a copy from Amazon or your local bookstore and let me know what you think.

Also, be aware that I am in the process of expanding my service arena to better serve a larger audience, so keep in touch with me and I will let you know what new programs you can participate in as they become available.

Get ready to start living your best life ever as we spend time together via this printed word, which I have filled with my intention and purpose. We will see and feel each other’s presence as you read these words and begin to see your new life eagerly waiting to join you.

We are going to have a blast!

Love and light,

~ David

Here’s the scoop on the book:

Live a Better Life, Your Best Life and Make the World a Better Place

live-a-better-life-your-best-life-and-make-the-world-a-better-placeBy David M Masters

Price: $20.00

Description:

In this book you will find the tools, tips, techniques and thought patterns that will enable anyone who desires to live not only a better life, but one’s best life ever.

The story of your best life starts now, no matter what your stage and circumstance in life is, you are in the right time and the right place to start living your most amazing life.

According to author David M Masters, we all have come to this planet with a unique mission and message to share with the world which is buried deep within at a very early age. When you become realigned with your purpose in life, your life explodes into the best life ever.

Even if you think you’re not worthy, or unqualified, it doesn’t matter; and if you’re feeling bad, like you’ve lost everything, or have no reason to go on…

You’re in the right place at the right time

To reinvent and live a better life and launch your best life full of abundance and happiness that you might have never believed possible.

live-a-better-life-your-best-life-david-m-masters-usa-book“The best stories start like that.”

Masters says whose life-long mission has been to help others achieve their highest and best.

Now is your time to live a better life – your best life – and make the world a better place as you discover your mission and share your message.

Crime Victim Recovery

Realizing that you have been victimized in some way by crime can have a devastating effect on one’s life. One can become a victim of crime in many different ways. Some examples of the types of crime victims that can be overcome include:

Adolescent Victims of Abuse

This could be a young, underage person who has been physically or emotionally victimized either by another adolescent or adult and may include molestation, or physical abuse resulting in injuries, like, bruising, broken bones or other maladies. This could be an immediate issue, or one that has continued to cause suffering through adulthood.

you meant to victimize me crime victim recovery

Adult Physical or Emotional Assault or Abuse

Again the spectrum covers the widest range of forms of assault or abuse. Assault or abuse can include everything from psychological manipulation or mind-control techniques to physical threat of violence or the use (real or implied) of a deadly weapon.

Gang Violence

The obvious negative effect of gangs on or society is the victimizations of others who may or may not be actively involved in the gang environment; and may include all forms of crime, violence and/or victimization.

Random Act of Violence

Occasionally victims of violence are simply in the wrong place at the wrong time when a violent act occurs. This is the most difficult type of violence to rationalize, due to its randomness. Acts of terrorism may result in violence that may be experienced as random.

Sexual Assault/Abuse

Obviously these crimes are sexual in nature but also cover a wide breadth of possible assaultive or inappropriate methods that can have an emotional impact on the victim. This category includes sexual harassment, inappropriate touching, rape, incest, exhibition or pornography without consent.

DUI or DWI Victim

These victims have special needs because there may be no logical rationalization for the victimization except for maybe being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Unlike a random act of violence, there is a definitive underlying cause of either driving under the influence or driving while intoxicated while piloting a 3,000 pound weapon. Victim may also include the driver operating a vehicle under the influence of alcohol or drugs, presenting a completely different set of emotional issues.

Human Trafficking

You might be surprised to know that human trafficking is alive and well in the USA. Often we associate human trafficking as something that only happens elsewhere.

Property Loss, Robbery, Theft, White-collar Crime

This is the most annoying type of crime for our judicial system… After all, “How would you feel if someone took something from you?” Of course the perpetrator wouldn’t like, it… but their answer is simply to re-steal it from someone else. Many thieves are psychopaths or sociopaths who have no conscious or regard for others; no social boundaries.

Usually these crimes are less violent and involve deception and manipulation to facilitate loss or injury but may have a violent influence by integrating a threat of violence (or presence of deadly weapon) in the con. May include identity theft, embezzlement or fraud whereby the perpetrator gains unfairly at the expense of the victim or arson.

Stalking

Stalking includes any unwanted contact between two persons and can occur at home, at work, or now even online. Thankfully, our judicial system has supported an effort to curtail stalking and has initiated laws to protect you from stalking and cyber-stalking.

Vulnerable Adults

Some adults, who are advanced in age or may have a physical or mental dysfunction or disability, may be more susceptible to becoming a victim of any crime. Realizing this, our government has passed new laws that offer protection and more severe penalties for defending the rights of vulnerable adults.

Elder abuse and fraud falls under this category also.

Homicide Survivors

Friends, relatives and loved-ones of murder victims often suffer emotionally and the grief from underlying unresolved issues can be debilitating.

This brief list is not by any means complete, but gives you the idea of the types of crime victims that can be overcome to stop the victimization, cessation of continued pain and discomfort and moving on victoriously in a positive manner.

Victims of crime can suffer from a variety of physical and emotional pain. Examples of issues of victims commonly addressed I have encountered with clients include:

  • financial exploitation of the elderly fraud theft crime victimsLoss of sense of security and/or fearfulness
  • Ruminating or the re-playing of the event or circumstances ad nauseam
  •  Haunted by dreams, nightmares or sleep depravation
  • Social withdrawal or detachment
  • Internalization, guilt or self-blame
  • Memory of concentration dysfunction
  • Poor self-image, helplessness
  • Bleak future outlook
  • Lack of trust

Know that you are not alone. There are specialists experienced in dealing with victims who struggle with these symptoms of crime victimization, and are well-equipped to help you deal with these and many other issues that you might be struggling with.

Review your recovery options and put you back in control of your life.

 

What, Me Worry?

“If anything can go wrong, it will,” is not only reportedly a summation of Murphy’s Law, but also a prime tenet of a person who is consumed with worry. Worrying about things, leads to stress and a host of other conditions and as a negative emotional state attracts more negativity.

It is reasonable to be concerned about life, loved ones and life circumstances, but when concern overtakes rational thought, it becomes worry; and worry is a killer.

what-me-worry

Worry is an effective demonstration of the power of thought, because:

What is worry?

Thought (or concern) out of control.

And worry tends to become a self-fulfilling prophesy.

Why do people worry?

Unfortunately, worry does seem to make you feel like you’re in control. I mean, if you ruminate on the worst case scenario and it comes to pass, then you have not been surprised and there is comfort in seeing your predictions come true. “See, I told you so,” is the worrier’s mantra, which even makes someone with low self esteem feel superior in the moment.

Sorrowfully, the physiological, psychological and sociological impact of harboring worry and the stress it causes on the mind, body and spirit is dangerous.

People who have a tendency to worry about things are less well than their carefree contemporaries. Physiologically, worriers are prone to high blood pressure, blood clotting, heart attack, stroke, stomach aches, heartburn, constipation, diarrhea, body aches and pains including headaches and back pain.

Worry can have a profound effect on respiratory conditions including loss of breath or asthma and even skin conditions such as dry skin, itch, rash or causing the worrier to break out in hives.

Worry compromises your immune system, increasing susceptibility to being overcome by bacteria, viruses, and other disease like hypertension, diabetes and cancers.

Worry also impacts out psychological paradigms leading to anxiety, phobias, and hypochondria, increasing restlessness, fatigue, lack of concentration, irritability, problems associated with sleep and may leave the worrier with a clinical diagnosis of generalized anxiety disorder.

Sociological impact can affect all your relationships, as your fall victim to paranoia and lack of trust which could lead to increased domestic disturbances and loss of interest in sex. Worry also affects one’s ability to manage finances, hold a job or conduct business as usual and if conditions persist may cause being disrespected by peers and an inability to cope with everyday life, let alone unforeseen disruptions or challenges that might arise.

Stop Worrying

Right, we all know we would be better off without being bogged down with worry. No one actually wants to be consumed by worry or be labeled a worry wart. Worry is bad, we get that, but to stop worrying altogether, is quite a jump because worry is a negative state of mind that could easily be an addiction.

How to Stop Worrying

To change one’s process of thinking is a process that takes time. The axiom, “one day at a time,” is totally apropos when deciding to shift from negative thought processes (especially if heavily ingrained over time) to more conscious, positive thought processes.

If you know it is time to change, you can stop worrying the moment you recognize it. Think of worrying like you are on fire, your body is engulfed in flames. What are the rules?

Stop, Drop and Roll

Stop the thought by interrupting it. Say the word, “Stop,” out-loud (if you’re in private) or slap your forehead (the one-handed clap, as my friend calls it). Drop that thought, like it’s a hot potato and roll it over into a positively spun thought.

For instance, if you’re worrying, “I’ll never be able to finish this assignment on time, and I may be demoted or lose my job if I don’t…”

Stop! (Slap)

Drop that thought, and

Roll it into a more positive one, like, “I am doing the best I can, maybe I can do better. In fact, if I rearrange my schedule and put a little more effort into this, it might be awesome and on-time. I might even get a promotion.”

Small shifts, like this, can have a huge impact on your life, liberating your from the ill effects or worry, so that you can go on about your life as you begin to enjoy all the good things this life has to offer.

Got It You Can Do It

There is no doubt, you got this and you can do it, but what does it take to get from here to there? And how can I move more quickly and confidently towards what I want?

As you may have noticed, some people are more likely to attract the things they desire because, like Larry the Cable Guy, they simply git er done. But what makes them think they can do it?

you-can-do-it-got-it

The substructure that is the foundation of their can do attitude is a general feeling of knowing they have confidence to problem-solve and achieve. This confidence can come from a variety of sources, like:

Mastery, Witness, Social Empowerment and Wellbeing

Mastery of a particular skill or practice implies that you have performed this particular activity with a satisfactory result before. The level of mastery is dependent on how many times you have completed this task with a level of competency. The knowledge that you have been there and done that without fail gives you the confidence and competence to think that you’re likely to successfully do so the next time the opportunity arises.

The witness has seen a procedure from start to finish on one or more occasions and believes it is possible to reproduce a satisfactory result based on the fact that he or she has seen the process before.

If you have witnessed a process in action, obviously it’s not the same thing as having done it before but you have a huge advantage over the majority of people who have no idea about how to even go about performing such a task.

Social empowerment is magical, because it bolsters your confidence in your ability to perform something you may not be officially qualified to do. This would apply to something you have never actually done or even witnessed before.

You might find yourself in this situation, if others believe you are the person who has the ability to get things done, so naturally, they are drawn to you to tackle a particular project. Even though you have no history of doing it before, their confidence in your ability supports your belief that you can actually do it, which gives you the confidence to move forward (often with satisfactory results).

Then there is wellbeing. Wellbeing represents the raw materials necessary to get through whatever task or challenge you face. You must have the physiological wherewithal to move through all the necessary steps which may require energy, a degree of strength and/or stamina. A healthy person knows they have these reserves in check, ready to go for it.

The people who are in the habit of getting things done are likely not sickly or depressed, but if they are, they have the ability to push beyond their biological or psychological limitations for the duration of the project at hand.

Armed with any degree of any of these four categories of support Mastery, Witness, Social Empowerment or Wellbeing will give you the strength or courage to be able to view a particular project or task as an opportunity, rather than a threat. You will be able to rationalize, set and achieve the goals necessary to move through the project and navigate unforeseen interruptions as challenges and deal with them appropriately. And in the event that you have tackled a project full on and have not achieved a satisfactory result, you don’t take it too hard.

To you, there is no such thing as failure. You take the knowledge from your experience and file it away for use (or avoidance) the next time the opportunity arises to demonstrate what you can do.

You got this

You can do it

Got it

I Was Wrong

If you are the kind or person who is constantly blazing a new trail throughout your life’s journey, you’re likely to experience missteps when burrowing through uncharted territory; and this is a good thing.

i-was-wrong-taking-responsibility-for-your-actions-i-screwed-up

Onlookers, casual spectators, doubters, critics and haters are watching every step you make and are likely to point out that you’re wrong to wander off the beaten path. It’s as if in the event that you suffer any damages that you deserve it because you’re not doing it right or as though something is wrong with you. The nay sayers may try to demean you, disrespect, try to discredit you or make fun of you. Their expectation is that you turn away from your cavalier exploration and return to the herd in an effort to save yourself from embarrassment, death or worse…

The truth of the matter is the haters and hecklers are not bad people, it’s just that they are incredibly frightened you might succeed and any mistake that you might make along the way, justifies their lack of taking a more proactive approach to their life. The more they exploit your mistakes, the better they feel about their own mediocrity, for at the very least, they are somewhat safe and no one is challenging their decision to remain in the life they’ve become comfortably accustomed to.

I applaud you for being one of the few of us who choose to take the road less traveled. It’s not so much that we develop a skin thick enough not to react to attacks by folks who are uncomfortable with our personal growth and progress it’s just that we wouldn’t let someone’s words throw us off track. At least they’re not using sticks and stones.

The best way to quickly recover and get back is to acknowledge you could have done better and get back to your work. If your accusers appear to have an attitude of genuine concern or reside within your inner circle of influence a little humility goes a long way. Humbly admitting

I Screwed Up

Will help people feel more empathetic to your cause if you are simply expressing your flawed humanity. No one can begrudge you for seeing us all as basically the same, all doing the best we can with what we have, even if some of us do it differently than others. On the other hand, if they are just hateful or disrespectful, you do not have to acknowledge their accusations at all.

Listen to Feedback

Occasionally, unsuspecting spectators can offer input or observations you were unable to see while entangled in the work that lead to your misstep. So, it’s good to lend an ear to those who have been watching from afar in case they may have insight that may prove to be helpful once you regain your balance and continue to re-engage your process. And you may be surprised to find helpful insight coming from hateful attackers (though it is unnecessary to acknowledge them, if it is your policy not to respond to people who are unkind), just file away the learning. In fact, for folks like us, there is no failure, only learning.

Learning from Mistakes

The most important component is that you extract all the knowledge obtained via your process of trial and error. The results give you a unique perspective which cannot be duplicated by the armchair observers as you move forward while taking responsibility for your actions.

You can spend years in college learning about all the best characteristics and techniques filling your head with practical concepts and knowledge, but the men and women on the front lines with their feet on the street actually doing the work and creatively approaching challenges as they appear on-the-fly and dealing with real-life circumstances which won’t show up in textbooks for years, they are the real heroes.

These are the innovators, not the imitators. They are setting themselves apart from the masses. To them it is better to create something from scratch, to bring value to the community for the greater good, even to aspire to make the world a better place, not just for themselves, but for the world at large for generations to come.

I am not condemning those who have opted to follow the path of academia. I applaud them for their efforts and discipline and find they make important team members. They bring skills and perspectives to the table that expands far beyond entrepreneurial street smarts, and they may well be innovators as well (and if they hang out with me for long, will find themselves spending more and more time looking outside the box, too).

Thanks for taking the high road.
We’re all on this journey together, yet independently.

-Carpe DM

 

Make Space for Something New

If you’re ready for something new, then you’re ready to create the space for something new.

Something old might need to be cleaned up or discarded to make space for something new.

The act of making space creates the energy necessary to increase the attraction of new things into your space. Create a vacuum and the universe will fill it.

make space for something new

Good things are coming to you… they are looking for space. Honor those good things by making the space for them.

Create space in your time. Are you always on-the-run? Schedule unscheduled time; make the space for something… anything and something will fill the space for you.

Frustrated about your wardrobe? Clean out your closet and see what apparel becomes more appealing, finding its way into those empty spaces.

Create space for a better life. Set aside an hour a day for your personal growth. Fill it with whatever comes, from meditation to hardcore personal research and development. This is your time.

Do an inventory of all the old things cluttering your life and bogging you down in old vibrations. A little housecleaning, garage sale, donation to charity or trip to the dump will ready you now only for a higher vibration, but might change your whole world as the things you’ve longed for have clear landing fields.

Where you are, right now, is a result of your vibration and the lack of space for something new. To expand yourself, you need a little elbow room, enough to make the space for new growth and expansion.

If you keep nesting in your old life, surrounding yourself with your old stuff because there’s a comfort in nostalgia which fuels the fear of the unknown, this may imbue you with a false sense of security. If this is so, you are likely to remain stuck in the life you’ve always known with some degree of compromise, comfortably numb. If you really are ready to begin your new life, make space for it.

It’s up to you to take the action, for if something did appear where would it go? If you have no time in your schedule, space in your home, office, closet, shelf space… It’s not welcoming the good things that long to bless you.

You might feel guilty about making space in your life. Many people find themselves compelled to put others before themselves, second guessing their potential for personal growth or change because it feels selfish in some way, or one might feel undeserving of anything good at all.

If you desire to move to the next level, you need to start saying goodbye you your old life of morbid mediocrity and making a concerted and conscious effort to move into the space where your personal best awaits.

Carving out an hour a day, a foot of closet space, cleaning out a section of the garage, making room on your bookshelf, spending less time with someone who drains your emotional reserves, whatever it is… this is the least selfish thing you can do.

Though your inner voice might condemn you about the pressing needs of your boss, clients, partner, children and friends who desperately need to consume every waking moment adding stress and strain to your already hectic pace, but the truth is

You cannot best serve or help anyone if your cup is empty.

Making space for something new is important self-care. You need to fill your cup to have more to offer those whom you love and care about.

Be bold enough to make it a priority to acknowledge your need and worthiness, while suspending disbelief long enough to dream a new dream and make space for your abundant metamorphosis.

If you do nothing, the weeds will overtake your garden, choking out any hope of new life. While you look at a distance, the patch of weeds looks green and lush enough to be pleasant. A closer look will lead way to disappointment as you consider the loss of potential fruit that could have occupied that very space, especially if you have desire or hunger for something besides the weeds.

A little weeding out the things that are restricting your new growth goes a long way, whether they are in your literal or metaphorical garden, which could be your schedule, home, office or may even include people in your circle of influence.

People in your life who are demanding your attention may be counter-productive to you accomplishing your goals or having the space for someone more supportive or beneficial to come into your life.

Now is the time to allow the opportunity for new growth, make space for it and all the good things that are waiting for you will fill the space you have created.

What Turns You On?

There is a wave moving across this planet awakening people to embrace their unique purpose and message and for the people who are bold enough and empowered to passionately exercise their gifts, talents and express their message, they are not only happier for following through on their purpose but often find they are rewarded financially, if given the opportunity.

How would you like to do that you love and get paid handsomely for doing it? This is one of the best benefits of living your life on purpose.

what turns you on

You can look for clues to uncover your purpose in life. You can discover your unique message and starting singing your song, just by taking a look at your life. For instance,

What’s that thing you love to do? That thing when time just seems to disappear when you’re immersed in a particular activity?

What’s the thing that you do – that comes easily for you – and not so much for others (and they’re likely to mention it to you or ask, “How do you do that?”

When someone complimented you on something you said or did, saying, “That was amazing!” what was it?

What is the thing that people keep coming to you for? What kind of advice, tip or type of encouragement are folks attracted to you for?

If your friends confide in you, is there a general topic that they seek you out and find comfort in your support?

What kinds of books, magazines, television shows or movies are you attracted to?

What talents and special abilities did you possess as a child?

What would you like to be remembered for, long after you are gone?

What activities would you engage in, if the doctor told you that you only had one week to live, and finances were not a concern?

The answers to these questions should give you an idea of what the universe is calling you to accomplish with your life.

Start writing, journaling; create a collection of words, writing down your ideas a feelings about what turns you on. Your words do not need to be masterful. You just need to start documenting your feelings about these things. As you do, you find a clarity developing.

Also consider asking yourself what extreme challenges have you endured and overcome (or are in the process of overcoming)?

You may be the only person whom others who are facing the same challenges can relate to. How can you reach out to help others in this area?

Start writing… keep writing… Writing not working so well? No problem. Get a recorder and start recording your words. Recordings can be transcribed (there are even programs and apps that you can speak into and they will type out your words for you).

Then just be open to the idea of allowing people who are attracted to you regarding your message to pay you for embracing your calling.

You can become a coach or consultant and start talking to people about your message or mission and charge by the hour. You can start a support group and charge a fee at the door.

You can write, publish and sell a book, ebook, emagazine, newsletter, membership site or fraternal organization.

You don’t need to work out all the details… Just doing the work and being open will attract opportunities and the right people to help you make it so, as you move forward in faith.

Don’t Should on Yourself

I work with people who come in covered head to toe in should. How can anyone have any quality of life when they’re covered in should?

I should do this, I should do that… There’s should over here, should over there. How can you get anything done when you’re so full of should?

don t should on yourself no should
Don’t Should On Yourself

Nothing good ever came from should.

Take a good look at your should, what do you see? A big, ol’ pile of should that is at the very least unsettling to examine if not totally disgusting.

Should is rooted in negative, guilt-ridden angst and needs to be eliminated from your life; otherwise it festers and piles up inside of you making you feel worse about yourself, doubt your ability to be productive, lose faith in yourself and can lead to self-loathing.

Should Elimination Cleanse

It’s time to take a big should elimination cleanse.

What’s on your Should List?

Get out a sheet of paper and write down all the things that you tell yourself that you should do on your should list. I should lose weight. I should write Aunt Emma. I should get a better insurance company. I should clean out the garage. I should get a better job. I should start working out. I should spend more time with my kids. Also include those things you feel you shouldn’t do, like I shouldn’t spend so much time with technology, I shouldn’t watch bad news, I shouldn’t drink alone, I shouldn’t show up late, I shouldn’t scream at the kids, I shouldn’t put others needs before my own, and the list goes on and on…

Look at the size of your should list. It’s overwhelming when you realize that you’re so full of should. We’re getting rid of your should list, although you get a chance to cull some of the things from the list and move them to another list.

To clean up your shoulds, get another sheet of paper, this is a list of goals. If you feel compelled to keep some of the shoulds, you may convert them to a goal only if you are willing to take action on it.

That’s the difference between a big pile of should that bogs you down and drains your enthusiasm and goals that inspire you to take action. Shoulds are the things that you don’t do and goals are the things that you do do. Shoulds feel bad because how long have they haunted you? They bombard you and overwhelm you with guilt and make you feel unworthy, that you’re not good enough or like a loser. If something’s been on your should list for more than a year: Really? That’s a lot of unnecessary self-abuse. But, if you’re willing to transfer it to your goal list, you’re only allowed to if you’re committed to taking an action on it within the next seven days. Otherwise, it’s gotta go.

You can revisit the eliminated should at a later date. If it is something you really would like to accomplish at some point, you can re-evaluate it when it’s more likely that you will take action on it and make a goal of it. In the meantime, there’s no more should about it.

Burn your should list. You’re done with that should. No should.

If you’ve transferred it to your goal list and not taken action on it in the seven days, take that should and burn it. Burn that should.

No more should.

You’re not taking any should any more. You’re shouldless.

And that’s just you shoulding on yourself. How often do you should on others?

You know what it’s like to be shoulded on. You don’t like to be should on, so stop shoulding on others.

And if people are shoulding on you, then put them on notice. They are not allowed to should on you again. You’re not taking any more should; not from you, not from anyone.

Enjoy living your new should-free life.

Love Is What Is Love

Sometimes in life, your desires for love fall flat compared to your expectations.

There are four basic types of love, such as

4 types of love world friend family romanceOne World Love

There is an innate part of us that expects that all peoples can mutually respect, love each other unconditionally and live in harmony. We all want to love and be loved without division, no matter what. Yet, we are disappointed to find division prevails so predominantly that we are more often than not at odds with each other and peoples find themselves warring against each other.

Love Between Friends

You have grown up with someone or met someone with common interests and something in you reaches out to them connecting with them in an effort to appreciate them, feel an affinity, even love them for who they are, what they stand for and you feel compelled to protect the relationship between you. You hope that this friendship-type-of-love will last forever. It doesn’t take long to find out that people are often not who they appeared to be, as we project ourselves onto them in an effort to establish such a love, nonetheless, some deep friendship connections do withstand the test of time.

Love of Family

When a mother gives birth to a child there is a deep connection a love-bond that is possibly closer than any other bond between two people. This love connection can spread throughout a family with the possibility of establishing a love relationship amongst all family members. Some love among friends can grow to familial proportions. While some families are united in love, some family and friends are united by bonds fueled by other adhesives.

Even though we want to love our parents and want to be loved by them, often the love we desire is not the love we receive, so we are inclined to accept whatever love we can receive from parents and/or family members if we are able to receive any at all.

Romantic Love

Romantic love is the most potentially powerful love between two people. So powerful in fact that the participant (or participants) in this type of love are willing to risk with in the belief that the potential for living the highest quality of life is more meaningful and enjoyable when shared by two of the most intimate of partners. This love includes a deeply emotional and strong sexual attraction, the feelings that fuel this type of love often do not last long but the relationship can survive out of a sense of duty or necessity.

Why is it that most all the love we desire seems to elude us?

Try this:

exude the love you desire to receive regardless of the circumstances or lack of reciprocity

Exude the love you desire to receive regardless of the circumstance or lack of reciprocity.

If you feel separate or different from the other people in the world, send love to the world, love all other people, even if they do not appreciate or love you. Love your neighbors and friends likewise, even if they mistreat you. Love your family members as if they loved you more than anything, whether or not you feel there is any evidence of their affection or support for you.

The love you seek would be a combination of all these types of love and you may be surprised to discover you will not find it outside yourself until you’ve found this degree of love within. Only then can you expect to attract the kind of person who also has the same capacity of love.

So ask yourself, “What would it look like if I loved all the people of the world, my neighbors, friends, family, and potential mate completely?”

Love like it’s the only thing that matters

because it is.

 

Setting Boundaries

Are you ready to move your life to the next level?

It’s necessary for you to clearly define your work area. It’s the same thing as having an office at your workplace so that you can have the ability to close the door and concentrate on the important things that need tending to in an effort to maximize your effectiveness.

The same goes for your life. You need to create for yourself a safe area to do the work of planning, preparing, growing and expanding so that you can move to the next level. To accomplish this, you must create healthy boundaries.

setting boundaries

Establishing Healthy Boundaries

Before you can go about setting boundaries to hold the sacred space for you to conduct your personal work, you might consider taking some time to go inside and discover within yourself where your boundaries ought to be located.

You know when someone in your circle of influence says or does something that doesn’t make you feel good. In fact, it may make you feel downright bad. Easy: draw a line in the sand right there. Write it down and keep going, until you have demarcated your personal safe zone.

But wait, there’s more…

Who are the people in your life who drain your personal reserves, toxic people who destroy your sense of wellbeing, who disrespect, hurt or abuse you? See them clearly for who they are, and begin to consider protecting your sacred space from these emotional (and/or physical) intruders.

Setting Boundaries

Find ways to either control the space between you and them or protect your personal space from their negative influence. Inform people what is acceptable and what is not acceptable as you define and protect your sacred space with love and respect.

This was an expensive step for me in my practice as I work with a lot of type A personalities who regularly disrespected me – not in an effort to berate me directly, but as a way to fully express themselves while we conducted deep work – while is it was effective, it didn’t make me feel good in those moments.

I had to establish a boundary and be willing to back it up. The day I drew the line in the sand, I called each person who would have crossed the line in the past, had I established it. I clearly communicated to them about my decision to set this clear boundary and enforce it. Enforcing it would mean severing our professional relationship. I had to come to the point where I valued myself enough, that I would no longer let people disrespect me, no matter how much they were willing to pay me to let them do it.

Some of the clients were offended and severed the relationship at the conclusion of the call. A few stayed but crossed the line and I promptly cut them off, and they departed disgruntled, while others continued to work with me, keeping their emotions in check when directed at me.

This helped me to create an exciting safe place for me to work, filled with love and mutual respect, empowering my clients and I to flourish within the space that we do our best work together.

Setting Boundaries

Once you establish a boundary, you must go about the work of setting boundaries by clearly defining them with the potential offenders, as they should be allowed the courtesy of honoring your boundary out of respect to you.

In terms of the more violent offenders, it may be counterproductive to approach them face to face. You need not face extraordinary drama or abuse when setting boundaries. In this case, it may be in your best interest to just create distance – a safe space – between you and the more difficult people in your life. You will be better off without them.

Enforcing Boundaries

Unfortunately, setting boundaries without enforcing them is folly. Enforcing the boundaries you have set can be the most difficult part of the boundary process. It may include saying goodbye to people you care for, love, admire, respect (or in my case, pay you good money). Nevertheless, if you’re setting boundaries, you must enforce them.

You will discover, as you define and protect your space, you will attract more centered, supportive and loving people to fill the vacancies left by those who moved away from your circle of influence and thrive as you continue to pursue the sacred work of you and achieving your highest and best.