Show Appreciation

One of the best ways to keep your love alive in your relationship is to continuously find ways to show appreciation for your partner. It’s so easy to let a love go stale when everything is going good and easy but don’t let your beautiful lake view turn into a swamp by restricting the flow of fresh, new appreciation to keep your lake of love vibrant and alive.

Letting your partner know he or she is not taken for granted is very meaningful and just taking the time to show appreciation helps to keep those love hormones alive, increasing the bond between partners.

You can show appreciation without a great deal of fanfare and still increase love’s bond by…

Talking About Your Partner

Simply taking the time to ask your partner about his or her day, letting them say whatever it is they need to say, echo it back in your own words, and ask for more. Resisting the temptation to jump in and talk about yourself and keeping the focus entirely on him or her releases Oxytocin which is widely known as the bonding hormone. In fact, most, if not all, efforts to show appreciation releases Oxytocin in the brain which endears your partner to you, and it goes both ways. You also receive a dose of Oxytocin from making the effort to show appreciation to your partner. Note: you get extra credit for turning off your phone during a one-on-one conversation.

Attentive Compliments

If you pay attention to your partner’s life throughout the day you can take note of some of the little things that endear you to him or her, things that are often overlooked or taken for granted. Later in the evening you can review those things and pick one or two (or three) and compliment your partner on these things that you are grateful for. This helps to keep your love alive.

Do Something Your Partner Wants to Do

We all know that opposites attract and more than likely your partner would love to do something that is not on your bucket list (and it might be on your activities-I’d-rather-avoid list of things not to do). Taking the initiative of offering to attend an event or engage in an activity with your partner that he or she knows you’d rather not do, is a great way to show your support and appreciation.

Lend a Hand

When you know your partner is knee-deep in a project that is trying their attention and may be moving their vibrational frequency toward stress, offer to help. You may, or may not, be able to help but offering your assistance can make all the difference. Think of other ways you might be able to relieve a little stress by rubbing his or her shoulders, a foot rub, or running a hot bubble bath for him or her. This communicates both support and appreciation, letting your partner know that his or her efforts are not taken for granted.

Play Dress Up

It’s easy to get stuck in the same ol’ same ol’ routine, play dress up, have a glam night and get duded-up for either a night out on the town or a candlelight dinner at home. If you set up a dress up even with a degree of spontaneity without any special event or occasion attached to it, this can add a little spice to your life and increase your attachment and intimacy. Of course, there are other forms of dress up, you can be creative and use your imagination, keeping your relationship fresh and new.

Digital Thoughtfulness

We all can be easily caught up in the daily details of making our way through life. You can let your partner know that he or she is appreciated by reaching out with a little nonchalant effort of recognition in the middle of his or her workday by letting your partner know that you appreciate him or her in a brief test or private message. Embrace available technologies that let you take advantage of the ability to connect with your partner, without having to interrupt him or her when they might be in the middle of something intense.

Flowers and Chocolates

To add emphasis to your show of appreciation you can add flowers (for women) or chocolates (for men) to add that little extra something to your admiration. This is a given for special occasions but it is far more meaningful when unexpected, for no other reason than you care deeply.

Show Appreciation in Public

Three times the Oxytocin is released when you recognize your partner in public vs. in private.

When you’re in a group with other people, sharing your appreciation for your partner in a public setting in front of other people as a way to recognize him or her, goes a long way in strengthening the bond of love between you.

Gratitude for Your Partner

This is the time of year to look back and review how things have gone for you this year. It’s easy to see the things that have not worked out the way you might have wanted to, but make sure to also review those things that you are also grateful for. By all means, don’t forget to look at the one that is closest to you. Think about all the things your partner brings to your life for which you are grateful, and be sure to express gratitude for your partner.

Showing appreciation for your partner is a powerful method of shoring up the bond between the two of you as a couple. Small gestures of you expressing gratitude for your partner can go a long way. You often feel gratitude, and you assume your partner “just knows” how grateful you are, but unexpressed gratitude is rarely, if ever, properly acknowledged by the person who means so much to you.

Certainly, there are particular times of the year which offer reminders and opportunities to show your partner how thankful you are for them walking along with you on your path of life. There is your anniversary (which some people insist on celebrating monthly), Valentine’s Day, his or her birthday, and of course, around the holiday season.

What about the rest of the year?

The most successful couples are celebrating each other, show appreciation for one another every day. This expression of gratitude for your partner pays off in increased bonding, emotional connection, and deepening of intimacy.

Seems like showing a little gratitude for your partner is not much to ask. If you’re shy, or find the idea of speaking out your gratefulness, there are other ways you can show your partner how thankful you are to have him or her in your life.

You could write a little note with a cute saying on it. Make it meaningful and about him or her, something you appreciate, specifically, and leave it somewhere they will find it.

Little touches, just a finger along the arm, gently brushing a leg, a little hug, or kiss on the forehead. Little connections, not associated with any sexual intention, say, “I appreciate you,” and lets the other person know you care.

Inquire about time spent apart. Like, “How was your day, today?” You might be surprised to find a lot more going on outside your view than you thought. And showing a little compassion by actively listening and caring about what has gone on in your absence helps your partner think that life is not going on without you when you’re away. After a while, he or she is looking forward to sharing details about your day, and throughout the day, they feel as though you are there, supporting them, and feel a sense of security in knowing that you will be interested in this, or that, and be somewhat excited to share when you ask.

Make special time to spend with your partner more often. Sure, date night is a great idea, but a little cuddling (without cell phones or other devices) at night in front of the glow of the television (the fireplace of the current day) can go a long way.

Take the time, and exert the effort to truly listen to what he or she has to say. Be quiet and look at him or her when he or she is talking. Listen intently, making eye contact, and repeat important ideas to him or her in your own words, in support and with the intention of understanding what it is he or she is trying to say.

Do something special, without having to be asked. If you are not the one who normally does the dishes, jump in and give ‘em a wash. Detail his or her car. Make dinner. Do a little something-something that is an unexpected gift from your heart to his or hers.

Add supportive power to your relationship when your partner is having a difficult time, hold his or her hand, look you partner in the eye and offer him or her your assurance, “I love you,” and remind him or her that, “It’s you and me against the world.” And, “I’m here for you, no matter what.” If you really want to ramp up your appreciation and love, dare to add, “You’re the most important person in my life, I am blessed to have you here. I would do anything for you.” (Of course, use your own words, if this doesn’t sound like what you might say.)

Express gratitude for your partner in private, but also be bold enough to show great appreciation for your partner in public, in front of family, friends, and co-workers. This will cement the bond between the two of you, and increase intimacy (you’ll see that later, in private).