Bullying the Unbullyable

Bullying is nothing new and more predominant in our society today, more than ever, and there is a growing awareness and movement which may reduce some of our inclination to bully others, even though our society is pretty much centered around bullying. While all this bullying is going on there are those who try bullying the unbullyable.

There’re very few of us who do not know what it’s like to be disrespected, intimidated, humiliated, threatened, judged, lorded over, or otherwise bullied by someone. And if you’re fortunate to have avoided exposure to being bullied over the course of life, you have certainly noticed bullying represented in the defense of different schools of thought or ideals.

Sometimes we get so caught up in the idea that we are the person we are as we define and/or perceive ourselves, but you are so much more than what you think you are. Even if you have an extremely expansive and evolved view of who you are, keep in mind that as you attempt to define all you are and who you could possibly be, you are only scratching the surface.

The truth of the matter is this, no one could ever hurt you, without your permission. This might be hard to wrap your head around unless you’ve faced the worst demons imaginable and defeated them. If you’ve read the words of others who have done so, such as Viktor Frankl’s memoir, Man’s Search for Meaning which delineates the unimaginable tortures survived as a Nazi human scientific experimental subject, you begin to get a sense of the possibilities of man’s persistence in the struggle for survival.

We all could learn the most powerful lesson from iconic survivors, like Frankl, who learned to understand the difference between who we really are and who we are as experienced via our human body. Only by embracing the life of that higher version of himself, was he able to separate his true self in genuine freedom from the surgical experimentation his physical body was enduring. While they were painfully destructive to his body, Frankl found solace outside his body and they could not hurt him there.

Once you understand this expanded separation from the you as experienced in your body and that higher version of yourself, you understand it is impossible for anyone to do anything to hurt you.

From this vantage point you can see the world as more of what it is, seeing it as it unfolds, yet separate from it, like watching a movie. In the case of an episodic bullying, for instance, you can see a hurting person striking out at the you in your body out of the pain and suffering from his tragic past. If it weren’t for being able to see the episode from this perspective, you might feel like a victim being bullied as trapped inside your body.

Unfortunately, most of us humans are unaware of our higher selves, never able to realize that we are watching, listening and experiencing this life’s journey of yours as it is being experienced by the you which resides in your body.

With a little practice, you will be able to experience life from this higher perspective and take back the power which was your birthright when you first emerged into this life, with the freedom and liberty to shift perspective at any time.

You, like Viktor Frankl, and countless others will be untouchable, unmoved, threatened, or hurt by anyone, ever, as you watch the details of your life unfold before your eyes, like an incredible drama of which you are the hero and the star.

The hero must persevere through challenges and gain knowledge from experiences to allow the emergence of the hero within enabling you to courageously overcome anything life has to throw at you as you grow and expand into your evolving self.

Others may make fun of you, not believe in you, judge you, falsely accuse you, disrespect you, even attack and intend to cause physical harm to your body, but you, the greater part of you, can never be hurt because you are invulnerable and therefore unbullyable.

Bullies and Their Victims

If you are attracting bullies (predators and less than desirable people who may be predisposed to victimizing you), it might be a good idea to take a look at what you might be doing to attract the attention of a bully and ultimately become a potential target.

Actually, when you think of bullying, your mind takes you back to the school yard, and media attention is being given to bullying among our youth today and its effect on our society. The truth is, it’s been going on for a very long time before all this media attention and the bullies of our youth, are now up to their same old tricks in adulthood.

Among adults, bullies are likely to most commonly rear their ugly heads in the workplace. Their attention is piqued by the same things as adults as they were in their youth, their radar is seeking out people who they do not like (for whatever reason) or are threatened in some way by.

Predators often look for good people who they feel compelled to take down a notch. They might feel threatened by your peace, cheerfulness and/or success and after noticing you think, “Oh, they think they’re so blessed, or better than anyone else, someone needs to teach them a lesson.” And they take it upon themselves to deliver your reality check.

From the point of view of the predator, this is their purpose in life, levelling the playing field and knocking well-doers off their pedestals, Even though the rest of us don’t see ourselves that way, this is how we are viewed by predatory bullies, as they are seeking out those who they could victimize or destroy next.

They are never satisfied by bullying one person. If you’ve been bullied and the bullying has come to an end, it’s not because the bully has stopped bullying, it only means his attention has been focused on a new potential victim, and if bored, the bully may come back to you, if you’re beginning to regain your composure and they feel you’re in need for another attitude adjustment.

So, you might be a potential target if you’re good at what you do, and may be better than them. They may see you as a potential threat to their success, or you may be what stands between him or her and their next promotion. Bullying coworkers is how they basically eliminate the competition. If they can discredit you by sabotaging you and/or your work to make you look bad, makes them shine in comparison. Taking out the competent competition at any cost is an effective tactic for the workplace bully. New hires at work always get the once-over by the workplace bully who can quickly evaluate the new employee’s potential to offer real value to the company organization. The newbies are easier to take out prior to establishing themselves and creating relationships. Inexperienced or older employees are also potential workplace prey.

If you are popular, successful and are well liked, you will find yourself a potential target, especially if the bully is lacking in self esteem or social status. Anyone who is more attractive, talented, has a natural inclination to be respected or celebrated by peers is seen as a potential threat and must be “taught a lesson.” If you’re getting attention – attention that the bully feels he or she is more entitled to – then, you may be at risk of becoming his or her next victim. They feel as though, if they cannot be the recipient of such attention, no one else will either… Not for long, anyway.

Intolerance fuels the fire of the predatory bully who sets out to humiliate anyone who does not share similar values or lifestyles as the bully. Folks that maintain high moral values and integrity are likely to become targets. Why? Because the bully cannot accomplish such feats or live an integrous life. The only way to make themselves look better is to force the perceived, “better than thou” target to fail (or at least to make them look the fool or failure to anyone that might be appreciative of their authentic integrity). These “goody goodies” also make outstanding targets because they are less likely to defend themselves, retaliate or fight back if attacked.

Let’s face it, these predators are small-minded and poor examples of being anything to aspire to become, but they are very effective at what they do best: decimating their victims. They harbor deep-seated inadequacies and jealousy that create their need to destroy others as the only means they know of to make themselves feel (or look) better.

More often than not, bullies do possess the talent and skills to be massively successful without aggressively laying waste to anyone or anything that stands in their way, if they could only use their powers for good, but their ego, insecurity and envious nature overrides the thought of doing the work necessary with their integrity intact.