You’ve done your best. You really have. You’ve guarded your heart and mind, filling them with positive thoughts, recited positive affirmations, found ways to maintain a positive vibration, only said good words, even about questionable people and circumstances, yet here you are; you’ve been hurt, betrayed, sad and/or lonely. You’re feeling like your ship has set sail without you. This is certainly not what you had planned.
No matter how much you try to plan, prepare, have the right mindset and heart-set, are kind, benevolent, righteous and/or deserving, stuff happens when you least expect it. And anyone – even me – would be knocked off their otherwise content horse of courage and possibly falling into the muck of disappointment.
What are you going to do about it?
That’s the question. You’ve suffered a setback, no doubt, and you’re feeling discouraged, rightfully so, but what you do about it makes all the difference in your world. If you focus on your misfortune and wallow in it, feeling dejected and blue, you could let it wrap you up in a cocoon of despair and you might find yourself sinking into a deep depression. Rather, keep your wits about you and try another approach to this predicament.
You feel bad, justifiably enough, so let that emotion pour over you. Allow yourself a predetermined amount of time (set a timer, if helpful) and feel all the anger, frustration, hurt and shame you can muster… then, when the time is up, pull yourself together. Get back on your horse, albeit a little less enthusiastic than prior to this unfortunate event, and stay the course, realizing that sometimes in life, bad things do happen to good people.
This is when you can start looking for the hidden treasure.
More often than not (if not always), unruly incidents that catch us off guard are blessings, though you may not be able to see it in the moment of being shocked by the unexpectedness of it, you find yourself in a much better position. It might not make sense now, but at some time in the future, you will find yourself grateful, having gone through the experience which prepared you for something far more significant.
Think about it. Isn’t that they way it’s always been?
When you’ve suffered an undesirable circumstance, hasn’t it always either led or prepared you for something better? And if you cannot see that, it might be time to take a closer look at those otherwise negative experiences from your past. If you can look at it (hopefully not overcome with emotion. Try using your imagination as if you were watching the event on a TV screen without sound), give it an honest review and see where it led you to or prepared you for: Voilà! You can see it. There is something more magnificent at work than meets the eye.
Life can have hidden cosmic Ninja training included for you that will imbue you with the experience and skills to allow you to deal with greater challenges in an effective manner further down the road, beyond your field of view.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed by emotion, just realize that this is a part of your life experience. There’s no need to avoid or deny it. Just allow these feeling to envelope you, then put them aside when you are able and move on.
Sometimes friends or family can hold you to an impossible standard, likewise, you may hold yourself to unrealistic standards. Remember that no one is perfect, and we all will make missteps. Be forgiving of yourself and others. After all, we’re – each of us – are only doing the best we can with what we have.
Remember, in the face of adversity; try to look at it as if it were a test, challenge or gateway to something far better.
When things don’t turn out, like you expected, look deep into the situation or circumstance for clues of deeper meaning or a lesson to be learned, then release your emotional attachment to it.
Don’t let disappointments get you down, be the victorious warrior who seeks your highest and best in all things. Know there is a silver lining and keep going.
If you’ve reached what appears to be the end of a journey, begin looking for an opening. A door a window, a path will appear.
If you’re feeling overcome with overwhelm, seek the aid of a professional, a counselor or coach who can help you work through this event. Invite the process.
No one ever said life would be an unfurled bed or roses, and if they did, well… you know better. Life is full of ups and downs; learn to find enjoyment in the ride, like the exhilaration of a roller coaster.
I have learned that when I’m blindsided, I start to get excited because something really good is coming. So, get up, brush yourself off, put a smile on your face and be looking… Because no matter whenever things don’t work out like you had planned, something so much better is coming your way.