My Partner Just Doesn’t Get It

What goes through your mind on that day that you wake up, look at your partner, and say to yourself that he or she, “Just doesn’t get it.” Every day you are getting more and more clear about your life, what turns you on, gives your life meaning, and makes your heart sing, then think to yourself, “My partner just doesn’t get it.”

You might see your profession as an extension of who you are deep inside, fulfilling your life’s purpose but your partner just thinks you work a boring job that he or she couldn’t possibly see him-or-her-self doing for any amount of money, and truth be told, you’d do it for free because you love it so much.

You know that what you do every day is making a contribution and helps to make the world a better place.

The most romantic idea in the world would have your partner loving the same things that you do with the same degree of love and admiration. Very little makes you feel so loved. Time passes, people grow and change, certainly, both of you have.

Just because your partner does seem to care about your passion(s) in this life, is not necessarily an indication that he or she isn’t interested in you.

Regardless of whether your partner takes an interest in your passion, it’s more important that you find those things that turn you on, do them, and fund fulfillment within yourself for being true to yourself, your calling, and purpose. Let your partner be aware of what you’re doing. If he or she doesn’t respond with glee, do not be discouraged.

Of course, we all think it would be nice to be supported and uplifted for doing the things which are more meaningful, because we invest our heart, mind, and soul into these projects, often for little or no remuneration, so any show of support would be appreciated, but not necessary.

In a relationship, there should be a cooperative reciprocal support for each other’s interests (which there probably is in the beginning). Then, as you both grow and change, it can fade over time, and that’s okay as there are different strokes for different folks. If your partner is not supporting your thing, it doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be supportive of his or her thing.

As always, you should be giving the love you desire. So, support him or her the way you would like to be supported, maybe your partner will reciprocate, if not, keep doing your best.
Stay true to what is meaningful, important, and pleasurable for you. Keep discovering your own innate skills, talents, special abilities, and passions. Out of these, try focusing on the three that have the most meaning for you at the time.

Feel free to experiment, try them on, and see how they fit. Look in the mirror and see what you feel like (metaphorically) with this new attribute. The most important thing is to check to see if it pleases you. If your partner doesn’t appreciate it, notice it, or seems disinterested, that’s okay.

Try not to show off or seek your partner’s approval. If he or she notices it, fine. If not, this too is perfectly acceptable. Give him or her enough sacred space to work on their own stuff,

If you’ve awakened to a new understanding, awareness, or state of being, you can briefly mention it. If there is no interest in it, simply file it away with your truth intact. You cannot persuade or convince someone to see from your point of view. To do so completely is next to impossible. Attempting to force someone to see it borderlines abuse.

Your first responsibility is your life, your growth, and expansion. You were born with all the permission and power to achieve your highest and best, living a better life, your best life, and make the world a better place. The support or encouragement of your partner is not necessary.

Stay true to your path and keep checking in with yourself to see if you’re on track.
Unlimited possibilities are within your reach, waiting for you to ride the wave to the most exciting and fulfilling life.

And if you’re feeling as though, “My partner just doesn’t get it,” that’s okay.

Keep going…

When Love Dies in a Marriage

You got married with the best intentions. When you got married you vowed to love each other for life, but something happens after you’ve signed your affirmation of love on the dotted line, the love you had begins to fade. What can you do when love dies in a marriage?

Love is like an ocean, with ebb and flow. There are good times, bad times, and most of the time you just sort of modulate within the “okay” sense of being neither good nor bad, just somewhere in between, finding the marriage somewhat tolerable.

Like incoming waves, your marriage is visited by incoming waves of love which nourish the relationship. Every seventh wave (as each relationship is different so is the time differential between waves of love) is good enough to make you feel good and strong enough to stay in the love cycle for another round.

The only problem as you stay in this cycle of love waves, the incoming waves of love decrease in their volume as your ocean of love evaporates and can dry up completely. This is when love dies in a marriage.

When your love has died, what’s the point of being at the beach at all? You think both of you would be better off just to cut your losses and go your separate ways, and the thought of revisiting another love beach is either vastly appealing or sounds like an ominous devastating idea inviting dissatisfaction and broken heartedness.

If you choose not to throw in the beach towel of love, you could alternatively choose to love again.

You can infuse your marriage with love just by being willing to step out in faith and recreate the environment of past love and reinvigorating your marriage by acting as if your love never waned.

All you have to do is to remember the way you felt and think about the things that you did when you felt you were overwhelmed by love’s magic spell. Back when you were in the throes of love, you did different things than you do today, You may have done anything for the object of your spouse. All you wanted to do was to express your love and feel the love emanating from your partner.

By doing the things that you did when you were “in love,” even though it doesn’t feel the same or like you’re just going through the motions, you will notice the feeling of love returning to your heart and countenance.

When you feel like love has died in your marriage, remember this…

Love is not dead. Love is, always was, and will forever be. Love is eternal.

You can keep your love ocean full and vibrant by turning on the tap of unconditional love.

Unconditional love is such a high concept and it is frightening for the average mortal to even consider. What? To love someone no matter what?

To say to someone, “I love you no matter what you say, no matter what you do,” just sounds like you’re inviting disrespect, pain, suffering, and abuse. You imagine nothing good could come from that because everyone is always out to get you or take everything from you and victimize you.

Just the idea of giving unconditional love, even though you want to be loved in this way, can make you feel angry.

Sounds like a lot of fear, and fear is the opposite of love. There is no love in fear, but often there is fear in love, and love cannot be raised to its highest form (unconditional love) in fear.

It starts with you. If you can allow yourself to tap into the unlimited source of unconditional love (God), you can have so much love for yourself that it overflows into the world around you.

In this state of unconditional love you can fully love anyone, even your loveless spouse, so much that you don’t require receiving any love in return. One person in unconditional love can sustain an otherwise loveless marriage indefinitely.

A common response of a loveless spouse in a marriage with one partner loving unconditionally is to reciprocate love, leading to a profoundly loving marriage between the two.

Love not only returns to the marriage, but it surpasses any love that has gone before. This is the power of true love which is unconditional.

Think about these things and when love dies in a marriage know that it does not necessarily indicate the marriage is dead. Love is all around and true love is lying in wait, ready to breathe new life into any relationship, eliminating fear, if you dare to release it.

Want to learn more? Consider attending an Awakening to True Love seminar near you.

Cheaters Have Nothing to do with You

It’s easy to internalize your frustrations if you’ve been with a partner who has been unfaithful. Cheaters have nothing to do with you. If you’re monogamous and committed to someone who is a cheater, when he or she has left, you might start questioning yourself. “What did I do?” or alternatively, “What’s wrong with me?” amongst other self-deprecating questions. When the truth is it’s about the cheater, not you.

Cheaters are gonna cheat. That’s just the way it is. You can change a cheater, it’s just the way they are hard-wired. Can a cheater change into a loving, caring, monogamous, and faithful partner? Yes. But you cannot change them. Only the cheater can change his or her life that drastically. Nothing you can do can change them.

Your first instinct is to blame yourself because you lack the full lovingness for yourself, so you question your worthiness, as all your insecurities rise to the surface, making you feel worse and worse about yourself, while the happy-go-lucky cheater is off on his or her next conquest.

Nothing is wrong with you. You are perfect in every way, only you do not realize it or know that all the love you seek resides within you waiting to be set loose in all its power and glory.

Lacking this true love from within, you will submit yourself to the endless abuse of not feeling as though you are not enough, questioning your authentic beauty, or over criticizing your income, weight, choice of apparel, hairstyle, mannerisms, possessions, family, beliefs, or any other endless possibilities that might make you feel less than worthy.

The choices other people make, the things they do, have nothing to do with you. You are for more inconsequential in the lives of people who have little or no regard for you than you might think. People just say or do stuff because their lives have led them to say or do this or that. That is all.

If it wouldn’t have been you, it would have been someone else.

You are not responsible for the life your ex- has lived up to this point and you can never know what is going on inside someone else’s head or heart.

In most (if not all) cases of infidelity or the inability for someone to make a long-term commitment comes from a lifetime of insecurity, fear, and/or abuse, every detail of which could never be fully known by any other person.

It’s up to you to look after your own feelings and sense of worthiness. You need to not let anyone have control over how you feel. In this way, you can reclaim your power from anyone who has threatened your otherwise sense of wellbeing.

If you let others to be responsible for how you feel, you would be just like your ex- who is constantly needing someone else to make him or her feel good. And when you make someone else responsible for how you feel, it works, but not for long.

If someone doesn’t like you the way you want them to, don’t feel bad. Be grateful that you found out when you did, because it could have been much worse had your relationship been allowed to continue in its dysfunction.

Your value is not determined by anyone or anything outside of yourself. Your preciousness comes from the love within yourself. Allowed to grow within yourself your love can expand and overflow to others and the world around you.

Without this unlimited source of love enveloping you, the best you can do is to mitigate your emotional state, with all its contradictions and inconsistencies, the best you can by applying emotional bandages (other people and what they think of you).

You are perfect, with all your imperfections, just the way you are.

You were born in love, full of love, and worthy of love, for you (in your truest essence) are love personified. Even if no one else recognizes your sacred divinity, it still remains true; you are pure love.

You don’t have to prove yourself to anyone, ever.

You love yourself enough to walk away from any relationship which is not in alignment with your highest and best.

You and your love is all the love you need, and when the right person shows up with a vibrational frequency with is alignment with your highest and best, nothing can stand in your way.

Great love is on its way to you.

Romantic or Unconditional Love

Two people meet, fall in love, pledge their vows of love to each other, and live happily ever after. This is the romantic aspirations of most people who seek romantic love in the world today.

There are many forms of love which are active in our society. Love is used on a wide spectrum including many possibilities and representation. On one end of the spectrum you can love chocolate cake, and on the other, a desperate heartbroken young child can find solace in his or her mother’s embrace accompanied by the speaking of the words, “I love you.”

All love is good love and the more there is of it in our world, the better the world can be. For a moment consider there might be a difference between romantic love and unconditional love.

There is nothing better than entering a relationship in love with the expectation that it would last forever. There is an instinctual part of you that wants to go through life with someone by your side. Having to decide who that might be only once, sounds like a dream come true.

When you are attracted to someone or something, this is an expression of your flesh, creating a desire for it whether it be a particular type and color of a car or a prospective mate. Certain hormones create a chemical reaction in our brain which makes us love one thing over another.

The love chemical reaction fades over time and so do the feelings of love. That’s why your admiration of that new car is often replaced by resigning yourself to drive the darned thing, while you long for another car that is more appealing; one that causes your love chemistry to kick in. And so it is with romantic love.

Romantic love projects expectations on your partner. If they look and act in a way that is in line with your expectations of him or her, your love is sustained. If not, you are disappointed and may respond negatively, potentially giving way to disapproval or anger.

Unfortunately, romantic love is based on this expectation and the challenges you face with being shocked by the stark realization that the object of your affection has failed or is unable to meet your expectations.

Instead of fostering togetherness, as in the two of you becoming one, romantic love separates each of you into a my-way vs your-way opposition fostering a push-pull power struggle which can never be won.

Romantic love will have you endlessly attempting to make your partner fit your perception of how he or she should be based on your expectations, with little consideration for who your partner really is in his or her own natural state, or respect of individual potentialities which are yet to be realized.

Romantic love is perpetually fueled by fear of loss, which keeps you looking for clues of potential loss, and as a self-fulfilling prophesy, that which you seek appears, either by using your overactive imagination, or real-life circumstances, which you may have called into being by your fear.

Fear leads to disrespect, suspicion, loathing, and even hatred, when you are jolted into the reality that your love cannot be sustained by whom or what you believed could be trusted to fulfill your expectations of love. This dichotomy creates a violent cognitive dissonance which rocks your world and wreaks havoc on your emotional wellbeing.

Unconditional love, on the other hand, is quite the contrast to romantic love, in that there is no my-way vs your-way opposition keeping you separated. There is no right way, there is no wrong way. There is just you and your partner in love inclusive or all respective possibilities.

This is only possible by allowing true love to flow from the source of all life which does not impose expectations. This true love loves purely, without expectation. It does not look for flaws, nor does it seek to punish. Unconditional love loves regardless; no matter what you do or what you say.

Unconditional love can only be expressed if your heart is full of love for yourself, and to the degree to which you possess this kind of love for yourself, it can overflow into the life of your beloved.

Of course, in unconditional love, there will be differences which appear, but these are allowed to be expressed in love, and you may talk openly about whatever comes up in the contrast of your love experience with openness and honesty, allowing growth or allowing what is to simply be as you move forward.

You were created by this unconditional love source and the potential for it resides in every cell of your body. You can let loose this unconditional love and let it permeate you and the world which surrounds you at any time, if you can allow yourself to consider the possibilities.

Unconditional love is the most powerful force which can be wielded by any man, woman, or child and is more powerful than anything else. It exists in all life, everything, and without it, nothing would be.

God blesses all love unconditionally, from the romantic love looking to be negotiated and contractualized between two, and the unconditional love. Love is love, and everything is love.

God bless you on your journey in love.

No Love? You’re Why

Why is it so hard to wrap your head around unconditional love? No doubt, you want unconditional love. You want someone to love you no matter what, but when it comes to your loving someone else, it immediately turns to conditional love, or, “I’ll love you if…”

It might surprise you to discover that if you have no love, you’re why.

You are the reason you are not able to engage in unconditional love because it takes two; your partner and you. The you that keeps all the love you’ve ever imagined just beyond your reach.

Some people refer to this you as “ego.”

Your ego looks at love as a means to an end, a method to get whatever it is that you want, and to provide you with the sense of safety and security that you longed for as a child but rarely, if ever, received from your parent(s).

Chances are, you’ve looked for love in the past and it didn’t turn out the way you thought it would. You may have suffered a few of love’s wounds along the way, and your ego will collect every possible indicator culled from your past to prevent you from falling victim to love’s evil again.

This results in your gathering many (oh, so many) red flags as a method to protect you.

In my Awakening to True Love seminars, we discuss that unconditional love, the only true love, is about the giving of love. It requires nothing from those to whom it is given. True love is a free gift, without expectation of receiving anything in return.

To love unconditionally is to love no matter what you do, no matter what you say.

“Oh, hell no!” your ego shouts out.

Therein is the proof of it.

You want unconditional love, but your ego will not allow you to give it, therefore you can never have true love.

The ego can dress up a romantic affair to make it look and feel like love in an effort to extract a feeling of love or safety and security, but this illusion is not sustainable for long.

As soon as your ego feels the threat of not being able to sustain this love feeling, it will initiate various and sundry irritations, inconsistencies, conspiracies, suspicions, and demons to threaten your sense of wellbeing.

Your ego does not see it as your failure to connect deeply with this person, instead, it will do everything possible to make your partner the focus of your irritation and will exaggerate circumstances and your feelings until you are rescued from this relationship.

The love that you felt previously turns to fear and angst.

True love, your true love, will never come from someone else, it is drawn from an endless well of love which emanates from your heart, which is filled in unlimited capacity by the God of the universe.

If you can get a grasp of this, your ego will post up to guard the gates of your heart against you, with thoughts of “this is preposterous” because “How could the love you’ve been looking for your whole life be inside of you?”

To engage in true love is to surrender your “self” (your ego) and all that is to unconditional love.

In this state of being, all you are is love. Love is all that you see and feel no matter what. Even in the most desperate of circumstances, you can rise above it, see it for what it is, allow all the situations and players simply to be without judgment or blame; and love them and what is.

You can tell if you are in true love by the way that you feel. If you feel uncomfortable, fearful, at risk, or exposed to potential peril, you are not in the true love state. Unconditional love transcends that which is presented to us as a “cover story” or impending doom and gloom.

As more of us surrender to unconditional true love, a shift happens which resonates throughout the universe. At some point, this unconditional love will envelop our planet, and those who do not surrender to unconditional love will no longer be able to thrive.

Non-lovers will lose their power, fear will no longer serve them as a weapon, and they will find meaning in surrendering to true love, or they will deteriorate, and we will love them unconditionally, however they decide to live out their days.

For me and my house, we will love unconditionally.

Flexibility Love and Stability

The 7 Phases of Love depicts the love relationship which exists between most mortals. It is used as a text for lovers, relationship counselors, and coaches to give you reference points which are common among love relationships, even so, there is a great deal of variation among love relationships which enter offices seeking love therapy.

The problem with most love relationships which persist over time is that growth and change are not factored into the confines of the love relationship.

At the outset of your love affair, you and your beloved agreed to a certain set of parameters which represented each of your wants, needs, and desires of your hearts. You carve these love commandments in stone and hold each other accountable.

This is all well and good if you are in love with a robot and you are also a robot, otherwise it is destined to be problematic because people do change, and in the best-case scenarios they grow, and growth necessitates change.

Flexibility

The most successful love relationships are constructed with enough flexibility to account for growth and change, for not to presents the couple with a rigidity which is more likened to a prison sentence, or contractual agreement, which is all but impossible to maintain over time, unless one or both parties are willing to sacrifice their own growth and expansion.

Those who willingly acquiesce to resign themselves to a contractual relationship, in a sense agreeing to the long-term martyrdom of self, do so out of fear, and are likely not to achieve must satisfaction in life but are willing to sacrifice for some degree of stability.

In most cases, I see it as a matter of priorities when in the process of engaging in the love relationship.

While many people have a certain set of priorities to maintain in their lives, there are two which seem to impact love relationships more than others, and they are

Love and Stability

If these priorities are mismatched it can invite a lot of complications in the love relationship due to incompatibility. Both partners can have love and stability as their top two priorities, but which one comes first can have a huge impact on how the relationship is approached.

For instance, if stability comes first, then you will not be able to fully love until your needs for safety and security (whatever that might look like because it’s different for everybody) are satisfied.

On the other hand, if love comes first, then you will not be able to willingly do whatever it takes to supply safety and security until your need for love is met first.

You can see why having these priorities mis-matched can cause a great deal of conflict within the relationship. One is not right or wrong, it just is what it is. Everyone is entitled to his or her desires of the heart.

Realistically, if you want to have any hope of longevity in your love relationship, you must allow for flexibility, renegotiation, and change.

You may not find out that your love and stability priorities were improperly aligned until long after you’ve committed yourself to your relationship. This is just one instance when discovering such a discrepancy would call for an important heart-to-heart conversation and coming up with a new plan to address the differences.

All this negotiating is necessary when you’re in a love affair of the flesh. If you are in a relationship which is founded purely on unconditional love (which is very rare, even though many of us claim we love “unconditionally”) then, you are always open to growth and change within your relationship of true love.

Does “loving unconditionally” mean that you and your partner will live happily ever after? Or, “stay together forever?”

No.

It means that you love your partner so much that you want only the best for him or her.

If the day comes when your partner might be better off without you, then you bless him or her and let them go, in love.

You love so much, that you can not only survive but thrive in their departure, though it might be difficult at first, because above all when you love someone unconditionally, you desire only the best for him or her.

Unconditional love is a tall order, and it is not for the weak-at-heart. Loving someone, “no matter what,” is far more than the mere mortal can endure.

Relationships Come and Go

Living life is all about advancing, growing and changing. Not settling for mediocrity, nor staying in the same place. Real life is about transitioning from one stage to the next, making the necessary adjustments along the way, and relationships come and go, though some remain.

As you move through this life, you will encounter and bond with people along the way who will vary in significance. You may develop deep relationships which serve you in the deepest, most meaningful ways. You would like to believe that people who play such a key role in your life today will be there tomorrow. Yet in many cases, this is not meant to be.

The best lives are built on a foundation of growth and change, and sometimes, the people who mean the most to you today may not be suitable for the path you are destined to follow. Everyone has their own journey; some relationships can be sustained longer than others.

In order to keep growing, changing, and continuing on your sacred journey, you must be able to find comfort in moving on from relationships that no longer serve you, as you move on.

You’ve shared life and love with them, will cherish the memories, carry them always in your heart, and keep moving.

Everything is in divine order, and these people of varying significance were integral to your success and metamorphosis. They were there for you, supported you, cared for you, loved you, and gave you the strength to keep going on.

Returning to places or revisiting people from your past via celebration or reunion brings a flood of nostalgic emotion, instantly taking you back to the moment in time when these moments from your past were so integral to your survival and transition, and you are blessed.

As much as you might want to return to those times, you know you no longer are connected to those people, places, and things, like you were before. You are an entirely different person now, and so are they, living lives so different, each better in your own ways.

Realizing that relationships come and go helps you to appreciate the people who have significance in your life. You are far more appreciative, cherishing and honoring each moment because you know it may not last forever, though it may feel like it in the moment.

When relationships come to us we are blessed, sometimes sharing the most intimate of moments, when relationships go, it can be hard to say goodbye, even lead to heartbreak, or depression, but life goes on.

New people will be attracted to you to help you on your journey, and others will come into your life who will test you, help you to learn, grow, and expand into the best version of yourself.

There will be those who may be on a similar enough path to yours to accompany you for much, if not all, of your journey. These are those, the most special of whom will be there forever.

For those who you’ve left behind, they can live on forever in your memories, in the deepest most precious recesses of your heart, always honored and remembered for their blessing you along the way. In a sense, still encouraging you and supporting your continued growth and transformation from within.

Continue to love and bless them, and they may continue to love and bless you, even though you may never cross paths again, as you live a better life, your best life, and make the world a better place.

Love Comes When You Least Expect It

Even when the love manifestors are out there coaching us on how to flip the switch to make love appear in our lives (I know, I’m one of them), why is it that people still claim that love comes when you least expect it?

There’s one dominant reason that people declare love comes when you least expect it, because in most cases that’s the way it goes, even when you’re fervently working toward manifesting your perfect mate.

Getting matched-up with the person who truly is the perfect match for you is not something you want to rush.

Likely, if you’re in the process of finding the right person, especially if the reason is that you’ve selected the wrong person in the past or even a long succession of wrong people in the past, it’s because you’ve been doing it wrong.

It’s not that, “Your picker’s broken.” It’s more that you’re just not doing it right.

There are many reasons why we do it wrong which can be traced all the way back to your birth (and even before).

When you are deliberately and intentionally going about attracting or seeking your ultimate mate, now (hopefully) you’re going about it in a different way. Firstly, you have a better understanding of what you have to bring to a potential relationship.

The best love relationships come as the result of filling yourself with so much love and letting it spill over into the lives of those around you. True love starts with you.

You’ve realized that the way you went about it in the past did not serve you well, so you’re a little (or a lot) more particular about what’s going on inside your potential love interest.

There’s a good chance that in the past, you sort of jumped the gun and found yourself in a full-blown relationship due to premature infatuation. Your body and brain chemistry get triggered and the attraction faction takes over your ability to rationalize what’s happening.

This is a temporary condition. When the chemical reaction begins to subside, you wake up one morning, look over at the person sleeping next to you and ask yourself, “How’d I get myself into this mess?”

At that point, you either try to make the best of it or cut and run.

But when you’re cognizant, purposely and lovingly waiting, holding your own loving and sacred space for “the one,” it’s a whole different deal. You have your hormones in check. You’re aware of your tendency to make bad choices, and you’re more aware of what’s going on around you.

This state of increased awareness and alertness can actually be counterproductive in terms of the laws of attraction.

If you are exerting a great deal of effort and energy in trying to make your true love happen, it may actually produce an energy field which will prevent your beloved to be drawn to you.

It’s as if you are struggling against the current, or swimming upstream in an effort to find your true love, when true love is found in the releasing of energy. You cannot fight your way to true love (even though there are reports of people who have done so. I suspect this is a different kind of love. Even though it does appear to be sustainable over a period of time).

That’s why it appears that love comes when you least expect it.

Because you’re in the process of doing a lot of inner work while you are in the process of attracting your true love, there’s going to be a delay. You’re not going to exchange phone numbers with the first person that you’re attracted to this go-round. You realize this is not in your best interest.

So, it’s going to take longer than the hookups which you’re probably more accustomed to.

Once you’re aware of who you are and who would be best suited for you, there is a sense of urgency, seeking, and filtering process which you engage in, which is upstream activity. Not the best energy for attracting true love, though it can happen.

When you’re nearly ready to collapse from exhaustion (from all the upstream activity), you’re considering the withdrawal from all the “putting yourself out there,” you might want to hold off on deleting your profile.

It’s when you’ve released and let go of the angst and expectation, when you’ve given up, that the holy spirit is allowed to bring true love to you.

That’s why it looks like love comes when you least expect it.

You’ve walked away from the work of seeking love or trying to make love happen with all your best thinking and activity of the flesh.

True love is not an act of the flesh. True love is born of the heart in peaceful and overflowing abundance without any effort, as if floating downstream in love’s flow.

That’s when love comes; when you least expect it.

The Perfect Relationship

The perfect relationship looks like what?

If there were such a thing as the perfect relationship it would be the joining of two people who love unconditionally, honor, and respect each other fully for what they have in common, shared goals, individual goals, and passions, celebrating each other’s differences and helping each other do the deep inner work.

While the previous paragraph seems acceptable on the surface, it is a challenge which only the chosen few can even conceive of let alone accept or attempt to embrace.

Imagine what it might be like to love unconditionally. That means, “I love you no matter what.” No matter what you say, no matter what you do, I love you. Marianne Williamson calls it, “Love for no reason.” There is no, “I love you if…” for that is love for a reason. Unconditional love is just that: Unconditional.

When approached with the idea of authentic unconditional love, today’s contemporary independent thinking woman might immediately respond with a resounding, “Hell no.” and who could blame her? If that sounds like your first knee-jerk reaction to loving no matter what, realize that is your head talking. On the other hand, your heart might yearn for such a love. Consider listening to your heart, what does it say?

Don’t you long for someone to love you unconditionally, no matter what? Of course, you do. But for some reason (probably because you’ve had your heart broken in the past) you can’t imagine allowing yourself to be vulnerable to loving someone, like that, again.

How can you want what you’re unwilling to give? Because of a combination of unhealed emotional wounds from the past and the lack of self-love. I know, you feel like you love yourself well enough, but do you love yourself unconditionally?

Honoring and respecting what you and your partner have in common might be easy enough but truly embracing your partner’s differences, all of them, a lifetime of them, the good, the bad, the ugly… All of it, no matter what?

Remembering that you are, each of you, powerful individuals with your own unique and individual purpose, message, passion, and mission in life. Independently, you can live a better life, and make the world a better place, but together your efficacy can become more than the sum of its parts. Bound together in unconditional love your abilities are multiplied exponentially to live your best life together. Imagine the possibilities.

Supporting each other to do the deep inner work, in a sense mirroring your partner’s most tender sensitivities and challenges, can help to encourage the other to rise above his or her own demons, the deepest, most painful wounds hidden from life’s view.

This is the most difficult and messy work, and the person who is closest to you, the one with whom you share sacred space. The one who will not judge you when you are engulfed by your most vulnerable moments which may be full of a myriad of negative emotions. The one who will love you through this process “no matter what” can hold your hand and take you in loving embrace as you trudge through your deepest inner work.

This is the perfect person to be with, in your perfect relationship. Not a perfect person, by any means, for none of us is perfect, but perfectly matched for you, in all you share in common and everything that makes each of you, opposites. The one you can trust with the most intimate details of your life.

It takes a lifetime to learn all there is to know about yourself, who you really are, how you tick… In the perfect relationship, you could do this work in half the time, leaving you much more time in this life to make the world an even better place, together, hand-in-hand.

You can have your perfect relationship. Whether you transform your current relationship to your perfect relationship, or start from scratch, you can do this, if you dare.

Considering Unconditional Love

Take a man from Mars and a woman from Venus (thank you, John Gray) and shackle them together with a contract and public declarations of “love” in front of family, friends, and other witnesses and what you have is the perfect recipe for disaster. And so it goes, day in, day out, every day.

The only people coming out on top of this contractual agreement intact are those who profit from the marriage’s failure, the attorneys, the legal system, the retailers, therapists, purveyors of booze and drugs (legal and otherwise), domestic violence programs, and legal institutions, among others.

Few people actually enter into the marriage with the intent to end it all in a furious blaze, yet it happens every day, and if you’ve entered into the institution with a prenuptial agreement, this signifies the preamble to divorce, a sort of self-fulfilling prophecy.

As divorce rates skyrocket leaving couples previously “in love” at each other’s throats battling for their own independence and survival in the shambles of the relationship, with little thought of what might have been missing, the one thing that could have turned the tables. The secret to a wildly successful love relationship can only be considered by the strongest, most advanced humans among us.

If you are a powerful, enlightened being, you might think about entering into the realm of true love. Not the Hollywood-inspired love, but the highest level of love, which we refer to as unconditional love.

Most relationships are based on fear, not love. I marry you to meet my needs, needs that I am unable to meet on my own, or fear that I might not be able to sustain by myself. The fear of, “what ifs,” of the most impressive negatively-charged imagination, prevent any possibility of true love appearing anywhere on the horizon.

Fear is the reason relationships break down, the only hope of positively-inspired true love is in the embracing of unconditional love between two lovers, but it’s not for the weak at heart.

Without true love, there is a competitive battle for control or supremacy, which can only lead to the destruction of the relationship, where it is thought that there can be a winner and a loser, but when a relationship dissolves, no one wins, regardless of who possesses the most marbles.

Men who are not entitled to engage in unconditional love are those who are physically or emotionally abusive. Those who understand that love is much more than a source of physical intimacy, or having a helpmate, have a grasp of the idea that true love is centered on the heart-to-heart connection between two mates.

Women who are suspicious, interrogate, jump to conclusions, and are critical of their mates, are in the vibration of fear which is the polar opposite of true love and unconditional love is not within her reach.
In a relationship of unconditional love, the man (Martian) provides for the woman (Venusian) and environment where she can self-explore, grow, and expand to her highest potential, while the woman responds in kind with true love.

In a loving environment which is open and honest, men and women are free to admit their mistakes, shortcomings, and weaknesses in full disclosure, without judgment or disrespect. They learn not to just listen with their ears but with their hearts trying to fully understand what it might have been like for his/her mate.

Forgiveness, not defensiveness, justification, or false accusations, is the first order of business in unconditional love among both participants.

Cooperative unconditional love is the powerful force which fuels the most amazing relationship which can be shared between two people and trust bridges the gap between the two.

Love when fully embraced by both parties can heal all wounds, is the secret weapon which can overcome and obstacle or challenge they face together and offers them endless opportunities to grow and expand.

Unconditional love is counter-intuitive. It runs in opposition to everything you’ve been taught about love by society. Love is not a method to be used to get what you want. Love cannot be bridled and forced to fit any contrived mold. True love is free and ever-expanding.

There is hope for true love in the world today. You might dare to entertain the idea by attending an Awakening to True Love Workshop, to see if you have what it takes to engage in unconditional love.