New Years Resolution

New Years’ resolutions, they’re coming up. It’s that time of year where you look back, review the progress you’ve made the last year, possibly recall your intentions at the beginning of the year, and compare where you are today to where you were only a year ago. How will this affect this year’s resolutions?

If you’re like most people, you started last year with the best intentions and at best within three months you’d slipped back into your comfort zone, forgetting about all those well-laid plans of having new and improved tomorrow.

Are you participating in a little self-sabotage by setting your goals too unrealistically? Sometimes, if you set your New Years goals too high, you’re bound to miss the mark.

If you take a look at the other folks who knocked their resolutions out of the park, last year, you probably noticed they took a little different approach.

You could take a more practical approach to achieving a goal by chunking it into bite-sized pieces. For instance, instead of resolving to

Lose 50 Pounds

I have a client who desired to do so, but accomplished it by avoiding such a lofty statement, and instead resolved to lose one pound a week. Almost a year later, she’s down almost 60 pounds.

The 50-pound resolution just seemed too overwhelming at it could lend itself to feelings of discouragement very early on, and this leads to the high failure rate of New Year’s resolutions. After a while (within the first three or four months) it just seems highly unlikely that you will be able to get there, so it’s easier just to fall back into the same ol’ same ol’.

It’s easy to spout off an incongruent claim or hope to have a better year, in the throes of a New Years Eve celebration, but to really have a vested interest in seeing your resolution take root and come to fruition throughout the coming year, that is a horse of a different color.

It’s going to take more than just empty words. It will require a plan, and a bit of stick-to-itiveness to get ‘er done. You will have to consider what obstacles that might get in your way. How will you stay motivated to keep going, even if you don’t feel like it, or when no one’s looking?

Will you have to make changes in your lifestyle to accommodate your new resolution? Is there the likelihood that you can make your resolution come through on your own, or will you need some assistance?

Sharing your resolution with others can help up the ante on your intention(s) at hand.
Teaming up with someone who has a similar goal can be good if he or she is as motivated as you are to see this through. Then, you can lean on each other in times of weakness and help to see each other through the tough times. But if your teammate bails, you better have a backup plan.

Family and friends can be very supportive (then, on the other hand, sometimes not so much. It depends on the family and friends). You might consider enlisting the aid of a coach or accountability partner to help keep you on track along the way.

Are you going to militantly force yourself to do whatever it takes, or make gradual progress over time to slowly get from where you are now to where you want to be?
It appears the most successful resolvers set up a series of small goals in a progression over particular time intervals, anywhere from “per day” to “per month.”

What if you miss the mark or fall off your horse?

No problem, dust yourself off and get back on as soon as possible. Don’t let a misstep or stumbling block prevent you from getting what you want, even if it means starting from scratch all over again. You can do this.

Here are some of the New Years resolutions that are probably crossing your mind, and you have the ability to achieve them, if you put your mind to it. Such as,

I’m going to lose X pounds

I am going to commit to performing a random act of kindness every (day/week/month).

I’m going to trade some of my extraneous activity time (video game play, Internet surfing, social media, or any other time-suck) for healthy physical activity (X amount of time per day/week/month).

I’m going to spend X amount of quality time with my family, loved one, mate/spouse.

I’m going to take up (insert name of new hobby or interest).

I am going to take a class in (whatever you want to learn).

I am going to do something (be as specific as possible) to make the world a better place.

I am going to volunteer (don’t let this be non-specific. Give it some thought and think about when and where you might like to lend your services).

I am going to save $xx.xx per (day/week/month) to put toward (school, vacation, travel, etc.).

I’m going to quit (insert addiction of choice and have a plan for either elimination or gradual measurable decline over time).

Just some ideas to set you on the road to a new and improved next year.

How to Do What You Want

How to do what you want, if you really want to.

Sometimes you want to do something so bad but it just seems too impossible, distant or out of reach. You can feel like you’re unworthy, not educated or qualified enough, or feel like someone else would be better or more respected for doing that thing that you want to do.

Focusing only on the ultimate goal, the end game, can be just too intimidating because it seems so far off or impossible from where you’re standing right now.

You have the power to take complete control over making your dream come true, or not.

What’s the answer to how to do what you want, if you really want to?

Keep the idea of your ultimate goal out there but take your focus and refocus it on taking small steps that lead you closer to your goal. You don’t have to do it all in one fail swoop. Just move a little closer to it each day or each week.

So, what do you want?

Want to live a stress-free life?

Do something relaxing every day, meditate, take a walk in the park, take a bubble bath with scented candles.

Want to start a new, or build a better, business?

Schedule time to research strategies and ideas – being certain to include taking action (not just research) – every week.

Want to write?

Then write. 500 words a day doth a writer make.

Prioritize

You can prioritize whatever you want and if you are moving toward it on a regular basis, sure enough, you’ll get there.

To prioritize and move closer to what you want (what you really, really want), all you have to do is what everyone else does (I know, they make it look so simple. Right? Well, it is).

Do the Doing of It

Make a plan, and do it. The difference between those who take and those who don’t is all in the doing of it.

Let’s say you wanted to publish a novel (you can use these steps to achieve any goal)

1. Write down what you want

Publish a novel

2. Break down your steps in miniature, each one moving you closer

Create a main storyline plot

Create character profiles for key players and their roles
Create an outline of major events (or chapters)

Write the first chapter as a rough draft

Write the second chapter (rough draft)

Followed by subsequent chapters…

Revise each chapter, flushing out the characters, dialogues, and interplay… (one chapter at a time)

Edit each chapter in succession, one-at-a-time.

3. Determine how much time you will have to allocate for moving toward what you want (daily, weekly, monthly)

I will set aside one hour each day to write my novel, a little each day.

4. Make dates with what you want, set times and dates to keep with yourself for the doing

8:30 p.m. to 9:30 p.m. weeknights

9:00 a.m. to 10:00 a.m. on weekends

There you have it.

Make time every day for the doing, and every day you’re closer than you were the day before. Before you know it, your first novel is ready to submit.

Then you can,

Celebrate!

Map It Out and Do It

Today’s the day you’ve decided to take action and start living a better life. You’ve thought about it, even talked about it but today is the day your entire being, body, soul and spirit, is aligned with the idea of actually taking the action necessary to life a different, wildly meaningful life and contributing to making the world a better place as you humbly differentiate yourself from who you were yesterday.

Taking action unlocks the door to your new life.

What are you going to do?

Today’s the day, but what are you going to do to start living your new life? Then, after you’ve done it, what will you do after that? What about tomorrow or the next day?

While taking action has gotten you through the doorway to your new life, having a detailed plan is the map keeping you on track, getting you from where you are to where you want to be.

You’re taking action and each step (or action) that you take moves you a little closer to the life you desire. Every step is cumulative and moves you closer to where you want to be – if – the step you’re taking is in the direction of what you want. Steps taken this way, or that, are steps taken and are not without value, as these missteps often have meaning, education and knowledge that can be used when you resume your journey to your new life. Taking deliberate steps focused on moving you closer to your destination gets you there more rapidly.

Having a map is an invaluable tool in navigating your life, keeping in mind that you must allow your internal GPS allow for recalculating based on new information as it becomes available along the way. So, if you’re ready (and I know you are) let’s get to mapping out your journey.

Reduced to its simplest form, your map is based on my grandfather’s formula:

What You Want + What You Do = What You Get

Let’s start at the very beginning (a very good place to start), according to grandpa’s formula, you need to know what you want.

What Do You Want?

Doesn’t really matter what you want, long as you know what it is. Whatever your destination is from losing 20 pounds to accumulating a million (or a billion) dollars, and everything in between, you must know where you’re going and have an idea about when you’d like to get there.

By knowing when you want what you want helps to make your thought more real as you move toward it and it begins to materialize. The “when” offers you periodic intervals to review your progress and can keep your observation skills honed on clues to see indications that you are nearing your destination. Without an estimated time of arrival (ETA), you could wander endlessly and be lucky if you ever arrived at all.

Once you have a clear idea about where you want to be and when, write it down. You have to take the idea from the invisible ethers and invite it into your 3D world by delineating it on paper. You can do it on your computer, but I think it’s better to create a physical map that you can hold in your hands as part of the conversion from thought to real world, as well as having a copy on your other devices, so that you can have access to it at any time on any device.

Now that you have a starting point and an ending point on your map, you can chunk your when into manageable sections, that can be reviewed and adjustments made if necessary along the way. Let’s say you wanted to lose 20 pounds in five weeks. Divided into weekly chunks, that would be a weight loss goal of four pounds per week. Every week you can weigh in and see where you are in comparison to where you want to be and decide whether celebration or buckling-down is more prudent for you for the next week.

[Wk 1: 4 LBS] – [Wk 2: 8 LBS] – [Wk 3: 12 LBS] – [Wk 4: 16 LBS] – [Wk 5: 20 LBS]

With manageable chunks or mile markers, you can have maps between each to optimize your advancement along the way. In this example, you might specify a particular diet plan each week to keep your weight loss goals moving the way that you want.

In this manner, each week could have a daily list of things to do to accomplish your goals along the way, such as eating meals of a particular content at specific times with healthy snacks in between and a 20 minute exercise break. At the end of every day you can review your daily progress and celebrate when you’ve successfully completed your daily to-dos, as well as each week’s celebration – including rewards for achievement – for meeting your goals.

Your commitment in the doingness – or taking action – to follow your map will assure you arrive at your destination. Keep moving and maintain a positive attitude. Use whatever skills and tools you have access to in making your dream come true. Use your imagination to visualize you, celebrating at the end of the road. What does it look like, feel like, sound like, smell like and taste like?

Keep On Keepin’ On

Keep it moving. Don’t let nay sayers dissuade you, knock you down or derail your journey. This isn’t about anyone else but you. Certainly things will come up and thwart the best laid plans and intentions, but don’t let it get you down and by all means,

Don’t Quit

To be the hero in your own story, stay focused on the prize even in the face of adversity. No broken hearts or spirits are allowed (for long) decide, “Ain’t nothin’ gonna break-a my stride…” For god’s sake, don’t quit.

You got this.