Dying to Self

It’s common for people who are on the path of personal growth to discover the biggest thing that stands between them and where they want to be is themselves. That part of themselves which is for the most part hidden from their conscious mind but more powerful than anything seen with the eyes. We call this your ego.

To you, this part of you feels like the most important thing in your life, as though it should be protected, guarded, adhered to, and obeyed at every instance. Your ego creates fear and paranoia at every opportunity and has you on alert for any hint of being disrespected or threatened and it has you on high alert, ready to fight or flee at any moment.

But this part of you is not that higher version of yourself which seeks to bestow upon you all the good things in life. That higher part of you that wants the best for you, encouraging you to want more, desiring to see you do things the easy way, instead of the hard way. It harkens you to achieve your highest and best.

When you witness someone so close to having the best things in life, then see them lost in a sea of helplessness with their hopes for a better life thwarted once again, if you’re compelled to think that he or she is his or her worst enemy, there is likely a self-destructive battle of the ego and pride going on behind the scenes.

You may have even found yourself saying, “I am my worst enemy,” and if you have, there’s a good chance your ego is the tiger you must tame to fully enjoy the good life.

Your ego is such an ever-present part of you who knows everything about you, every word spoken or unspoken, every feeling that you’ve ignored or tried to hide, every tear that’s ever fallen, and the only presence who has never abandoned you. It’s no wonder you’ve become so dependent upon it.

Your ego has assured you that it is the only essence which cares for you and seeks to protect you from that which seeks to destroy you, the lions, tigers, bears, and unseen things which are just waiting to ruin your life, keeping you in a constant state of fear.

The letting go of this protective and prideful part of yourself is frightening even to consider.

How can I live a life increasing the potential for vulnerability or danger? Surely, nothing good could come from that.

These are the thoughts your ego has cloaked itself in, to protect you from seeing its true nature.

Though the process may be grueling and not unlike suffering the prolonged dying of a loved one, letting go of the ego, connecting instead your love and life to that greater part of you, is not easy.

In fact, it’s referred to as a dying to self, which as you can imagine, could be quite traumatic.

Dying to self is a key component in religious, spiritual, personal growth, and conscious expansion. It is part of the emerging evolution of the human condition.

Every time a part of the ego dies, love (that every powerful, unlimited force of life) fills the void, your life gets a little easier, you experience a growing peace as life gets lighter and you find it easy to be happier for longer periods of time.

It’s not easy, and it’s not something you should consider running into haphazardly. Dying to self is serious business, and as the ego dies, there will be a grieving process, and that’s okay.

No one can really tell you how to conduct this process of dying to self and letting go of your ego.

This is your journey.

You can watch and learn from others who have gone before, but this business of letting go of your self which represents that barbarian part of our ancestors is highly unique unto you.

You must make your own way to your new, more enlightened, and evolved self which is waiting for your arrival.

Part of You is Dying

You’re growing, changing, taking responsibility and charge of your life. You’re embracing love, couldn’t feel more powerful, confident, open, honest and vulnerable… then all of a sudden, you feel overcome with an overwhelming feeling of emptiness, sadness, depression or unexpected fatigue.

As you search and review the areas of your life, you can’t seem to identify anything going on to make you feel this way, and you can’t understand why you feel this way.

Don’t worry, this is completely normal as you are expanding and evolving onto a better version of yourself. These unexpected challenges in your personal growth are normal as you are experiencing a vibrational detoxification.

You (your being, the person you are, all the parts of you en masse) are the result of a lifetime of programming which includes toxic thoughts, beliefs, feelings and experiences which have survived and thrived, hidden (sometimes, not so hidden) deep inside you.

As you are actively growing and expanding these deep rooted toxins are struggling for survival. They have so integrated themselves into your life and attached themselves to certain parts of your brain or body, where they have been safely stored for years. Now, they are no longer congruent as you are expanding and evolving and they are not being fed by your energetic attentions. They are shrinking and dying of starvation.

In the toxin’s struggle for survival, they will initiate thoughts and trigger the release of hormones which affect your sense of wellbeing and initiate sensations of negative emotions such as fear, paranoia, depression, or may even cause physical signs of sickness as they are dying off, in a last ditch struggle for survival.

You may find yourself suffering from headaches, even migraines, back pain or other body aches and pain and/or flu-like symptoms as manifestations of the toxin’s effort to distract and crush your hope for continued expansion.

This is a normal part of your evolutionary process, which also indicates a pending successive personal plateau in your expansive process is not far off.

It is always darkest before the dawn, and a new dawn is about to crest your horizon as the new you emerges.

When your negative emotions are running high for no apparent reason, and your’re finding it hard to stay on course, following the path to your new life, you feel as though all your energy reserves have been drained and you are finding it hard to believe you could keep going on,


Even if you’re feeling like your decision to take this journey is for not, and you’re experiencing nagging second-thoughts about the person you’re becoming, second-guessing whether the changes you’re making are real or just fanciful imaginative exercises. This is the time to keep going, in the absence of the feelings, of feeling as though you were doing the right thing, to stay on the path of your personal evolution, in stark contrast to the person you were before. That person is dying, and you are shedding the old you, not unlike a snake sheds its skin… Only your old skin doesn’t want to go.

A part of you has become so attached to your previous version of self, casting it aside seems like a painful separation, casting off, expulsion, a death of sorts, as you are dying to self. This is the time to keep going, even if you feel like you just can’t go on, stay the course.

But how can I, when I’m just not feeling it?

Keep going anyway. If you keep doing good things, only exposing yourself to positive information, media and influences, finding ways to think food thoughts, even if you’re not feeling it; stay on track, and that part of you that is protesting and struggling for survival will die off in the battle of old you vs. new you.

After the new you has survived this victorious process of growth and change, get ready. Something so powerfully new and amazing is waiting to take its place as the newer version of you expands and grows even more.