im sorry | David M Masters

I often have the opportunity to attend classes which center around emerging technologies in health, wellness, personal growth, and healing. I’m Sorry. Please forgive me. Thank You. I love you. Is a mantra that appears to be showing up in the common vernacular of healers and teachers of all kinds.

It’s showing up in all areas of life, logic, personal growth, and expansive thought. From practitioners to masters, they are all adopting this phrase as one of the tools in their toolbelt for life-changing results in their clients and loved ones.

This magic phrase hails from Hawaii and is referred to as ho’oponopono by locals. Dr. Joe Vitale (who you might remember from The Secret) was responsible for introducing and popularizing the ho’oponopono concept across the United States, by observing and reporting Dr. Ihaleakala Hew Len’s use of the technique.

I have run across many variations of the ho’oponopono phrasing, but the one that appears to be gaining the most popularity among the healing community is,

I’m Sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you. I love you.

That’s it.

Reportedly, Dr. Len changed the lives of criminally insane patients by performing his ho’oponopono ritual by placing one hand over his heart, the other on the file of the patient, and mindfully repeating the words, “I’m sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you. I love you,” over and over again, then moving on to the next file.

Some notable components of this modality are that it requires no knowledge of the patient of the process taking place, the doctor conducting the exercise had never met the patients, and only soulful intent while repeating the words, “I’m sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you. I love you,” was necessary to achieve the incredible results throughout the asylum.

Among the healing community, following a treatment session, it is becoming more common to use the ho’oponopono technique, as if sealing the work with a sacred kiss by repeating the words, “I’m sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you. I love you.”

There is a pseudoscience behind how the process works. Vitale and others offer training to certify practitioners in the use of this life-changing process, but this is not necessary for anyone to tap into this incredible healing gift from the heavens.

I have found, after learning about this technique and using it only for a short while, how easy it is to apply ho’oponopono at any time to any situation or circumstance.

This technique is available to you, right now. There is no need to take a course or to be certified to wield this powerful healing modality. You can witness the life-changing effects without even knowing how it works. This really can be your personal secret weapon for healing yourself, your loved ones, complete strangers, or the world, just by

Placing your hand over your heart
Mindfully repeating these words
1. I’m sorry.
2. Please forgive me.
3. Thank you.
4. I love you.
And allow the love energy flowing through your heart with your pure intention do the work.

Of course, you may seek out classes, certification, or at the very least check into the work of Dr, Joe Vitale and his book, Zero Limits for more information, but don’t let the lack of information keep you from trying it out for yourself.

You can apply this technique to anyone or anything, from a politician to a natural disaster. Whenever you hope for someone to have a better life, or want to see an entire shift in consciousness. Anytime you feel quickened or upset or would like to see something different, you can use your heartfelt intention and repeat the words, “I’m sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you. I love you,” and make the world a better place.

Saying, “I’m sorry,” is a way to smooth over any tricky situation between two people. Only, it’s become so commonplace it really has little meaning anymore. I am reminded of a time when a young Sascha would hurt her younger brother, Aaron. While he was crying, she would say, “Sorry,” then giggle because she’d one-upped him, once again.

I think it’s about time we returned the integrity befitting the genuine apology to bridge the gap which can appear between two people, who through no fault of their own, found themselves on opposite sides of a fence.

In contemporary society, when someone apologizes, it’s not uncommon for it to be followed by “but” which pretty much nullifies the apology.

Whether you forgot to pick up the dry-cleaning or had a torrid affair, knowing how to authentically say, “I’m sorry,” with a degree of decorum and authentic open and honest remorse with a bit of repentance thrown in for flavor will likely earn you’re another chance and potential forgiveness.

If you’re expecting your partner to lend an ear to you, it’s best to start off with honoring and validating his or her perspective, even if it is not in harmony with yours. Understanding where he or she is coming from is an important part of creating the connection necessary to rebuild and repair the relationship, whether or not any actual crime was committed.

Empathy goes a long way in expressing that you know what it must feel like for your partner, what he or she must be feeling. Let him or her know how you might feel if the roles were reversed and you believed your partner had done the same thing you’ve done or are being accused of.

It’s not just enough to say I’m sorry, your apology must be associated with some demonstrative action, if you’re ever to have any hope of forgiveness. So, man-up (or woman-up) and pledge to make the future different by committing to do something on your partner’s behalf which will help to rectify or repair the damage. It doesn’t have to be a monumental promise, but something that moves you closer together, not further apart, and signifies your commitment and ability to change.

If you’re looking for forgiveness, practicing a little humility and asking for forgiveness will go a long way toward getting you from where you are to where you’d rather be. Clearly, it was not your intention to hurt or let down your partner, nonetheless, here we are, and your partner is feeling slighted or betrayed by you. A little validation, expression of your intention, and asking forgiveness could be as easy as, “I’m sorry. I understand how you feel. I never meant to hurt you. Could you forgive me?”

If you’re apologizing and asking for forgiveness, you will be looking for one of two positive responses, “Yes, thank you, and I forgive you.” Or, “Thank you for sharing, and I will need time to think about all of this. I will get back to you on that.”

Either of those responses will have you on the road to repair and rebuilding the relationship and recovery from your faux pas.

Keep this in mind if your partner comes to you, saying, “I’m sorry,” and asking for your forgiveness. When you forgive, do not badger your partner over past transgressions. Forgiveness requires your letting go of your partner’s transgression. If you do, you only increase the possibility of being disappointed or hurt again.

We all make mistakes. You have a far better chance of your relationship healing, growing and thriving by forgiving your partner and moving forward in love.

Every relationship is built between only two people. If one of the partners refuses to participate in the relationship, there is no relationship.