Congratulations, you turned into everything you hate in a man, but you’re not one. I hope that makes you feel good, though I know it doesn’t because it is unsustainable and doesn’t look as good on you as you might think.
While there is nothing wrong with these words when used as affirmations to gain strength and courage when in recovery from an abusive relationship, the truth is that you probably do desire someone who has the emotional ability to mirror your own.
Of course, there’s nothing wrong with not needing a man or being independent, but if angst fuels your words, then it’s best to avoid any men you might attract because they are likely to be the same kind of men you’re trying to avoid.
That’s how the law of attraction works. And for God’s sake, don’t follow up with any version of, “I want a man who can take care of me,” for fear of appearing to be psychotic. It’s completely natural, though, because we all want someone to be there for us, to understand us, to love us with as much love as we can offer. That’s the way God intended it.
Don’t worry; I know what you meant when you said, “I am a strong, independent woman. I don’t need a man.”
You’re saying, “I don’t want to walk in the footsteps of women in the generations that went before. I don’t want to be a slave or subject myself to being treated abusively like my ancestors.” (Maybe there is some connection to abuse that you may have suffered in the past at the hands of a Neanderthal.)
But when you say, “I am a strong, independent woman. I don’t need a man,” you have made the same aggressive, exclusive, overbearing statement, which possesses all the toxicity that the kind of man you are trying to avoid would have.
You’ve exerted your authority over the masculine, and you’ll show him you’d rather be alone than entertain the likes of any man. Well, except for one who would honor and cherish me, not treat me like a piece of meat or a subservient housewife. Someone who wouldn’t victimize nor abuse me.
You want a relationship that is honorable, respectful, and full of love.
So, where do you start?
If you want real love, you have to start finding the love you seek inside yourself. This means letting go of negative feelings and replacing them with compassionate, caring, nonjudgmental feelings of love for yourself and others.
The work of finding inner love is not as easy as it might sound. You might think, “Well, of course, I love myself,” but being in that place is quite different than you might think at first blush.
You’ll know when you’re making progress because you’ll be able to think about men (even those who were sent before) without the negative feelings that were associated with those thoughts previously.
That’s when you’re ready to reach out and touch someone, not just anyone, and not the kind of men that you were attracted to in the past. You already know what to expect. You will be looking for a man of substance with whom you can connect heart-to-heart and soul-to-soul.
If you’re serious about inviting true love into your life, there are many ways to get from here to there. You might consider participating in an Awakening to True Love Workshop coming to a city near you.
Whatever you do, say goodbye to ever being a victim and finding all the love you can from within and someone who can share your love and theirs in kind.
All the love you’ve ever wanted is waiting for you.
Maybe the time for the return of the power of the Divine Feminine has come.
In life, there’s a unique balance between two important forces: the feminine and the masculine. But lately, we’ve lost sight of this balance. As we push for equality between men and women, we need to remember the essence of the divine feminine. It’s not just about being a woman or a man; it’s about qualities like caring, understanding, and wisdom.
Feminism, which fights for women’s rights, has done a lot of good. But sometimes, we’re trying so hard to be equal that we forget what makes each of us unique. The divine feminine is all about nurturing and intuition, but we’re starting to see it as weak or less critical. And that’s a significant loss for all of us because these qualities make us genuinely human.
When we forget about the feminine side, it’s not just the women who lose out. The men suffer, too. True masculinity isn’t just about being tough or in charge. It’s about being brave, honest, integrous, and respectful. But sometimes, it feels like we’re telling boys that they have to be aggressive to be real men, and that’s not fair to anyone.
So, what can we do to fix this? First, we must remember that equality doesn’t mean being the same. We’re all different, and that’s what makes us unique. We need to celebrate the nurturing and intuitive qualities of the divine feminine, just like we celebrate the strength and courage of masculinity.
We can start by treating everyone, whether men or women, with kindness and respect. And we can learn from each other, embracing the best parts of both the divine feminine and masculine. That way, we can create a world where we all feel valued and respected for who we are.
It’s not always easy, but it’s worth it. Because when we find that balance between the feminine and masculine, we’ll discover a world full of beauty, kindness, and understanding. And that’s something worth striving for.