An honest review of what is now the acceptable standard for family relationships is a far cry from the family dynamic of yesteryear. Are you happy with the way your family is?
It breaks my heart to see how far we’ve fallen, as there’s little respect for the family unit in comparison and chances are, if you’re a member of a family, you’ve found yourself a member of a
Dysfunctional Family
By definition a dysfunctional family is a group of individuals related by blood, marriage, or living arrangements that experiences conflict on a fairly regular basis. I believe this defines every family, so there’s nothing that unusual about being a member of a dysfunctional family, unless an abusive relationship threatens the family unit requiring intervention.
Even so, even “abusive relationships” can (and often are) exaggerated to effect a certain means to an end, without regard to the family member whose life may be sacrificed for the sake of his or her accuser, further exasperating the dysfunction of the family.
Nowadays, the expectation is that the whims of the individual outweighs the needs of the family, resulting in fractured families and broken homes causing more discord, especially when children and family suffer the consequences.
Unfortunately, the divorce industry and social services support the destruction of the family, and doing so, actually supports our government and the economy… but at what cost?
Children are now used as a weapon, and income is not a barrier in this, as it crosses all income levels and tax brackets, though lower income families are privy to legal prowess that would only be available to the wealthier families due to their low income level thanks to support from the Department of Social Services, Child Protective Services and the family court system.
Certainly, we need a system to protect children and families being abused, but our system is greatly flawed, because a parent can use the existing system as a powerful weapon, destroying the life of another (who may be undeserving) at little or cost to the accuser. All that is required is that the accuser be willing to exaggerate and lie to a counselor and possibly to a courtroom under oath. A small price to pay for someone to use – just the implied threat, or equivalent of – “Don’t mess with me or I will ruin you forever.”
Blended Families
You recognize these, they’re like the Brady Bunch; two single parent families with children from a different parent, come together to create a blended family, melding the families into one (hopefully) cohesive unit. In most cases, blended families actually consist of a single mom trying to find love, with children, partnering with a single dad (non-custodial), strapped by extenuating circumstances, visitation with child support and legal issues of his own. Though, some blended families are able to prevail and create a healthy family environment, regardless of the challenges they face.
The results? Look at the prison system filled with the people who were the children raised in these dysfunctional families. Why? It really is a choice. You can choose to live respectful life or a disrespectful life. I know. I come from as dysfunctional a family as you might be able to imagine. I chose to live a respectable life, regardless of my family life, and I vowed that when I entered marriage with the right person, I would maintain a higher standard of familial love, respect and support than was available to me in my youth.
Family First
My approach to family is simply, “family first.” For me, that means that if I am with you and you are with me, then my family is your family and your family is my family. I have a great deal of love for my family and I extend the same quality of love and affection for your family members as I do my own (reciprocity would be a reasonable expectation).
Such a heavy commitment to family doesn’t garner much respect in today’s society.
I hope to see a bright future for the United States and throughout the world realizing, supporting and sustaining the importance of family fueled by family love, tolerance and strength of family.