Trust the “T” word in love and relationships. I know, we hear more about trust, and its antithesis, betrayal, all the time. And though it is rare, you may encounter the occasional narcissist, sociopath, or psychopath, who will lure you into what appears to be “genuine bonding” but is only a scam, to exploit you, and leave you broken and nearly lifelessly discarded when he or she is done with you.
But if you’ve vetted your partner, and you’re sure you can trust him and her, and you can feel your love one for another growing, then you are ready to move to the next phase of love.
You need to know that,
“If I gave you all my love, metaphorically standing naked before you, allowing you to see all my most private, sensitive, and highly guarded secrets and insecurities, I know that you would honor this openness, and return the openness in kind. And I feel assured, that as we enter this new phase together, no matter what happens, no matter what becomes of this, you will love and honor me, as I will you. Because, after all is said and done, I know you really love me underneath it all.”
If you can say that in lovingly assured confidence, you are ready to trust your partner even more.
When you get to this stage, there is a major shift in your love relationship. Your love that you share with your partner is a strong bond like an impenetrable fortress that radiates love to all those who approach your loving energetic field.
Now, it is rare that lovers make it to this stage. More than likely, couples will have thrown in the towel and given up by now. For others, just the idea of moving a relationship to this level of openness is just too frightening, and they will begin reacting in ways that will cause the relationship to deteriorate, fail, or just walk away.
I mean, think about it. If you’ve been protecting yourself just to make it through each day of life ‘til now, just ignoring and denying the past, your inner demons, and cries of your inner child, just to get to today… why would you risk all the effort you’ve exerted? It’s been like a brutal battle that you fight every day. Why would you risk it all?
Then there are other couples who have survived together for decades drenched in denial, secrets, and live a good life, without taking any risk of truly opening up, and that’s okay, too. There’s no judgment here, we’re all just doing the best with what we have. Right?
But just like in the personal performance or spiritual growth and expansion paths, it is the digging down and allowing all those negative energies to bubble up so that you can deal with them, and let them go, that takes us as people to the next level, and is an important part in our expansive evolutionary journey as the human race.
To be free from the past, to be free from the fears, to be free from the chains that bind you, is where true freedom can be found, and to have the chance to share that kind of freedom with another leads to true freedom, and bliss.
And know this is a process. It’s not like it’s a one-shot deal, where you go away for the weekend and tell each other’s everything to each other. No, it’s a lifelong process, as each of you peels back more and more layers of the onion which is you.
This is hard work. Sometimes tragic. You might be privy to information that you might have rather not known, sometimes about people who you have to see and interact with periodically throughout your life.
You love your partner, and when he or she tells you these most intimate details, you don’t judge, ridicule your partner, or make light of it, because you love your partner, more than anything. You might find yourself being strong for your partner, or joining in a tearful brigade that could fill a lake.
And your genuine bonding need not only be deep and dramatic, you could do eye gazing. Just 5 minutes of doing nothing but facing each other and staring into each other’s eyes will release significant levels of the bonding hormone, Oxytocin. What happens after that is up to you.