It’s easy to internalize your frustrations if you’ve been with a partner who has been unfaithful. Cheaters have nothing to do with you. If you’re monogamous and committed to someone who is a cheater, when he or she has left, you might start questioning yourself. “What did I do?” or alternatively, “What’s wrong with me?” amongst other self-deprecating questions. When the truth is it’s about the cheater, not you.
Cheaters are gonna cheat. That’s just the way it is. You can change a cheater, it’s just the way they are hard-wired. Can a cheater change into a loving, caring, monogamous, and faithful partner? Yes. But you cannot change them. Only the cheater can change his or her life that drastically. Nothing you can do can change them.
Your first instinct is to blame yourself because you lack the full lovingness for yourself, so you question your worthiness, as all your insecurities rise to the surface, making you feel worse and worse about yourself, while the happy-go-lucky cheater is off on his or her next conquest.
Nothing is wrong with you. You are perfect in every way, only you do not realize it or know that all the love you seek resides within you waiting to be set loose in all its power and glory.
Lacking this true love from within, you will submit yourself to the endless abuse of not feeling as though you are not enough, questioning your authentic beauty, or over criticizing your income, weight, choice of apparel, hairstyle, mannerisms, possessions, family, beliefs, or any other endless possibilities that might make you feel less than worthy.
The choices other people make, the things they do, have nothing to do with you. You are for more inconsequential in the lives of people who have little or no regard for you than you might think. People just say or do stuff because their lives have led them to say or do this or that. That is all.
If it wouldn’t have been you, it would have been someone else.
You are not responsible for the life your ex- has lived up to this point and you can never know what is going on inside someone else’s head or heart.
In most (if not all) cases of infidelity or the inability for someone to make a long-term commitment comes from a lifetime of insecurity, fear, and/or abuse, every detail of which could never be fully known by any other person.
It’s up to you to look after your own feelings and sense of worthiness. You need to not let anyone have control over how you feel. In this way, you can reclaim your power from anyone who has threatened your otherwise sense of wellbeing.
If you let others to be responsible for how you feel, you would be just like your ex- who is constantly needing someone else to make him or her feel good. And when you make someone else responsible for how you feel, it works, but not for long.
If someone doesn’t like you the way you want them to, don’t feel bad. Be grateful that you found out when you did, because it could have been much worse had your relationship been allowed to continue in its dysfunction.
Your value is not determined by anyone or anything outside of yourself. Your preciousness comes from the love within yourself. Allowed to grow within yourself your love can expand and overflow to others and the world around you.
Without this unlimited source of love enveloping you, the best you can do is to mitigate your emotional state, with all its contradictions and inconsistencies, the best you can by applying emotional bandages (other people and what they think of you).
You are perfect, with all your imperfections, just the way you are.
You were born in love, full of love, and worthy of love, for you (in your truest essence) are love personified. Even if no one else recognizes your sacred divinity, it still remains true; you are pure love.
You don’t have to prove yourself to anyone, ever.
You love yourself enough to walk away from any relationship which is not in alignment with your highest and best.
You and your love is all the love you need, and when the right person shows up with a vibrational frequency with is alignment with your highest and best, nothing can stand in your way.
Great love is on its way to you.