Tag: love. true love

What Is True Love in a Relationship?

There’s a moment in your evolution when you realize that most of what you’ve called “love” has been a rehearsal. A beautiful rehearsal, filled with passion, lessons, heartbreak, and growth—but still, a rehearsal. Then comes something deeper. Something resonant. Something real.

This is true love.

And it doesn’t just happen to you. It happens through you.

True Love Is an Energetic Alignment

True love isn’t just chemistry. It’s not even compatibility. It’s something more primal and more divine—an energetic alignment between two souls walking a similar frequency.

This doesn’t mean you like all the same movies or foods. It means your intentions, your vibrations, and your spiritual commitments are moving in the same direction.

Example:

Jason and Maya met in their 40s, both after divorces. They shared similar wounds but had done the healing work. Instead of projecting old patterns onto each other, they offered presence. They didn’t fall in love fast, but true. It was less fireworks and more like two rivers quietly merging, flowing together toward the same sea.

True Love Reflects and Refines You

True love is not about perfection. It’s about authenticity and transformation. Your partner in true love will hold up a mirror—not just to your greatness but to your hidden pain. And they won’t run from it. They’ll stand beside you as you grow.

Example:

Ana used to shut down during conflict, a wound from her childhood home where emotions were explosive. Her partner Chris noticed this and, instead of demanding she “talk it out,” he gently said, “I’ll be here when you’re ready. I love you whether you speak or stay silent.” That safety became her doorway to emotional freedom.

That’s what true love does. It creates safe containers for growth. It doesn’t shame. It understands.

True Love Has Healthy Boundaries and Open Hearts

True love doesn’t mean endless tolerance or sacrifice. It honors the self as much as the union. It says: “I will not lose myself to love you—but I will love you so deeply that you never feel alone.”

Example:

Leo was used to caretaking in relationships—until he met Priya. She showed him that loving someone didn’t mean burning yourself out for them. When he skipped a weekend trip to rest, she smiled and said, “Good. I want the best of you, not what’s left of you.” That, for Leo, was a revolution.

True love allows each person to be a full human being, with space for their own journey. There is room for interdependence, not co-dependence.

True Love Is Both a Sanctuary and a Catalyst

A true love relationship feels like coming home—but it also launches you. It inspires you to become the best version of yourself—not because you’re pressured, but because you’re loved.

Example:

Vanessa had always wanted to start a wellness business, but her fear of failure held her back. Her partner, Miguel, believed in her more than she believed in herself. He didn’t push. He just held the vision for her until she could hold it for herself. “Even if you fall,” he said, “you’ll fall into my arms.”

This is the sacred paradox of true love—it challenges you and comforts you at the same time.

True Love Is Built, Not Found

We live in a culture obsessed with finding the one. But in truth, you become the one to attract the one.

True love isn’t discovered. It’s created, moment by moment, by two people willing to keep choosing each other, even when it’s hard.

Example:

After 15 years together, Dawn and Eric still have disagreements. But their fights are fair. They don’t weaponize past mistakes. They don’t try to win. They both try to understand. After every rupture, they rebuild—stronger.

They built their love like a cathedral: slowly, deliberately, with faith and forgiveness.

7 Phases of Love

The Mission of True Love

In the 7th Phase of Love, love becomes a mission, not just a feeling.

You and your partner begin to understand that your relationship is not just for your own joy. It is also a beacon—an example of what is possible for others.

Example:

Carlos and Yasmine host monthly dinner circles for couples. Not to give advice—but to simply model love. Their presence gives others permission to soften, to open, to try again. They’ve made their love a force for good in the world.

That’s the higher calling of true love. It doesn’t end at the edges of your relationship. It radiates out—transforming everyone you meet.

True Love Is a Choice and a Practice

Every day, true love asks:

    • Can you be honest without being cruel?
    • Can you hold your partner’s pain without absorbing it?
    • Can you grow in different directions and still walk hand in hand?

True love isn’t a one-time decision. It’s a daily one.

Present Love

True love in a relationship is not perfect. It’s present.

It’s not about how little you fight. It’s about how you repair. It’s not about the high—it’s about the depth.

If you’ve ever wondered whether true love is real, let this be your sign:

Yes, it is.

But only if you’re willing to become it first.

When you become the frequency of true love, you won’t have to chase it. It will find you—because it’s been looking for you too.

 

Define Love

So, you want it, you’ve longed for it your whole life, but you just can’t seem to get a grip on what love is. Before you start falling into it (as if it were a hole in the ground) you should probably have some idea about what love is. And if you’re thinking about getting into a love relationship, both you and your partner had best determine how each of you define love.

It doesn’t matter what age you are, the desire to love and be loved is universal. When From the time you were introduced to this planet by birth, instinctively you knew you wanted it, even though you have no ideas what love is. Now, look at you. It’s been a long time since you were born and you still want love and you want to give it, even if you’re really not sure what love is.

You already know there are different kinds of love. For instance the love of a mother for her baby and the romantic love in a coupled relationship are recognizably different. Then there is the intangible far off fantasy ideal of true love. You have a sense of knowing that if you could capture true love, it would be the best thing that could ever happen to you. While falling in love with someone is quite simple due to certain chemical reactions in the brain and our biological yearning to have an intimate partner, establishing true love is more complex.

To find true love, you seek out a partner who meets a list of criteria (and if you’re like me, it’s a long one) which includes (but certainly not limited to) trustworthiness, responsibility, transparently innocent and faithful, to name a few.

So, what is love anyway?

Devotion

No matter where the love exists, whether it be with your family, friends or a romantic partner, devotion is a standard component. When you are devoted to someone you are dedicated to maintaining a degree of allegiance to the other person and care enough about him or her to pledge a uncompromising support and concern about his or her well being. When you’re devoted to someone there exists a special heroic bond which creates a willingness to endure risk or engage in a potentially dangerous circumstance to protect the object of your affection.

Attachment

Similar to the bond between a mother and her child, attachment creates in you a feeling of connection to someone outside yourself, you often desire to be with that person and would like to see them content and happy more than anything. When oxytocin and vasopressin hormones are released into your brain, you are developing your bond of attachment. You are drawn to and desire to be in the presence of this person to whom you are tethered.

Attraction

When you look across a crowded room and your attention is fixated on another person with whom you would like to be deeply attached, or have an overwhelming desire to be intimate with, this is due to the release of testosterone and estrogen hormones in your brain. Left to themselves, these hormones make you want to have sex with this person but combined with other traits of love, can have you wanting a long-term romantic relationship with this person.

Commitment

If you have been burned before and have reservations about committing to another person, there is something inside you that desires to stay connected to the other person over a long period of time. Our society encourages marriage as a public declaration of your commitment to your betrothed. Even though the odds may be stacked against you, you and your partner team up in a counter-intuitive never-say-die declaration, “It’s you and me against the world.” Whether the contract is merely emotional, spoken or appears on a legal document, the fact remains, you are each one committed to the other, and committed couples tend to be more optimistic and likely to overlook otherwise undesirable traits.

Intimacy

For there to be a romantic relationship there must be some intimacy. In fact, a marriage document may not be legal without consummating the marriage. This is to say, if you want your marriage to be legal you must have sex to complete the contractual obligation to each other and the state. Not limited to sex, intimacy also refers to the deepening closeness shared between two people as they progress through life together. There is a deeper sense of knowing the other person as you share experiences in your pasts and in the now, while contemplating the future together.

Trust

Trust is hard to come by these days. You might know your partner, but you really only know what he or she has revealed to you, or you may have access to third-party information to gain knowledge about some of the things you wouldn’t otherwise be privy to. There is no way to really know what your partner is thinking inside his or her head. Building trust can be a difficult and lengthy process, even harder if you’re trying to rebuild it following a betrayal. In the most ideal relationship, both partners should be able to communicate openly, honestly and be able to believe and depend on the reliability of the other person.

Define Love

Since there are so many varying interpretations of what love is, it would be a good idea to delineate what love means to you. Then, after you’ve defined it for yourself, have your partner do the same. You might be surprised at how differently your partner defines love. Compare notes and make revisions with your mate to create a shared vision of love. What you will end up with is a comprehensive definition of love for both of you as a couple to share along the way.


Love, true love. Princess Bride

See you at the Soulmate Wizardry event.