Talk to Yourself

Okay, at first blush you’re probably thinking, “Talk to yourself? If I start talking to myself, next thing you know, they’re coming to take me away, ho ho hee hee ha haaa.”

Nothing could be more untrue, notice I said talk to yourself, not with yourself. You need to talk to yourself to reprogram data routines that undermine getting the things that you want in this life. In the coaching business, we refer to this as reciting affirmations, in the religious business, we call this positive prayer.

talk-to-yourself-positive-affirmations-positive-prayers

The key is in properly constructing the affirmation or positive prayer. Certainly, it must be positive. When you tell yourself (or pray about) something negative you are indicating to both your mind and your higher power that you have more lessons to learn. So, you attract more negative circumstances in answer to your words, in an effort to give you enough negative circumstance to realize that negative begets negative and positive begets positive.

If you want your life to move in a more positive direction, you must fuel the engine of your life with all the positive energy you can, and your higher power rewards your positive effort with even more momentum, the more positive you are.

When you’re structuring an affirmation, it should be positive, even if it is rooted in negativity.

For example, let’s say I think life sucks, am annoyed experiencing a low income level and am unable to make ends meet. I might be feeling helpless and hopeless and if I’m of a religious persuasion, I might pray a prayer, like

“Dear God, Why would you let me suffer like this? I’m broke, I’m tired, nothing ever seems to work out for me; it’s like everyone’s out to get me. I don’t see any hope of recovery and I feel so awful because I let down my family and people who believed in me and depended on me. I’m feeling worthless and alone, so very desperate, please save me.”

That is a prayer placing an order with God for an intense degree of frustration and difficulty ahead, which I’m sure you would rather avoid. Plus, the more you pray a negatively-charged prayer, like that, the worse it gets.

When in contrast, if you were to reframe your prayer to be more positive, it might look something, like this

“Dear God. Thank you for all the wonderful things in life that you have given me and the best things that are coming to me now. I am a successful and financially secure person with an unlimited supply of energy and resources thanks to you. Everything always works out for my highest and best and everyone and everything supports me in all that I do. I am wealthy in all things including finances as well as the love and support of family and friends. I am so blessed to have these people in my life. I am worthy leader, powerful and mighty. I have the ability and wherewithal to do whatever is necessary to allow even more prosperity in my life, and give you the glory. Thank you, I love you.”

Don’t just pray that positive prayer once and forget it. If you’re serious about it and serious about seeing the results, do it at least three times a day out loud.

If you’re uncomfortable with the religious references in the aforementioned example, no problem, there is still hope for you. All you have to do is to re-shape your life by using the same process without the religious jargon. So if you’re thinking

“Why do I have to suffer like this? I’m broke, I’m tired, nothing ever seems to work out for me; it’s like everyone’s out to get me. I don’t see any hope of recovery and I feel so awful because I let down my family and people who believed in me and depended on me. I’m feeling worthless and alone, so very desperate.”

Then your reprogramming positive affirmation would look like this

“The best things are coming to me now. I am a successful and financially secure person with an unlimited supply of energy and resources. Everything always works out for my highest and best and everyone and everything supports me in all that I do. I am wealthy in all things including finances as well as the love and support of family and friends. I love having these people in my life. I am worthy leader, powerful and mighty. I have the ability and wherewithal to do whatever is necessary to allow even more prosperity in my life.”

This positive re-framing, is a clear indication that you are nearing the end of this chapter in your life and as it prepares for positive resolution, you are ready to embark on a new journey, moving onto the next level of your life, as you leave these issues behind you.

I’ve seen religious folks have an easier time with embracing the idea of the power of positive prayer because these people are used to hearing stories of how prayers, like this, achieve miraculous results. Yet, non-religious individuals achieve the same results, without the benefit of acknowledging, recognizing or worshiping a deity at all.

It’s as if this concept is universal and available to all who engage in it.

To review the process would be to write down your concerns in their negative format on one piece of paper. On the other piece of paper, write out your positive script.

When posi-scripting keep everything in the first person. Let everything reflect your situation as you desire to be as if it were already so (in the present tense).

Read or recite your positive prayer or affirmation aloud at least three times a day. The more excited and animated your spoken delivery with a happy expression and enthusiasm, the more powerful it becomes. Start looking for things to change in our favor, and they will begin to appear.

Keep refining your affirmations or positive prayers and make way for a new style of living a better life, your best life.

How to be Confident Self Talk

Throughout the course of my career as my calling has taken on different colors, shapes, and forms, people have come to me with a variety of issues. One of the most common challenges that I find people struggling with self-esteem.

Back in the day I would work with individuals specifically with overcoming their personal concerns. As I refine my work, currently I work mostly with people who on the move; they’re the movers, shakers and risk takers, who need to be on their game to increase their probability of success; massive success.

Many of the modalities that I use deal with overcoming issues with one’s physiological, psychological or spiritual status. When dealing with issues associated with self-confidence it is often necessary to deal with underlying issues on all three fronts; the body, the mind, and the spirit.

When I am working with someone whose confidence level is a three on a scale of 1 to 10 and they have plans of making a presentation to an important audience, readying for a pitch for Shark Tank or getting to make an appearance on the Oprah Winfrey Network, it is imperative that you raise your self-esteem to a higher level. My goal is to get my client to a confidence level of ten.

Level 10 Confidence

When your self-esteem is at its peak and you’re exuding level 10 confidence you are unshakeable and unstoppable. You have the internal fortitude to take on any challenging situation or circumstance that would be intimidating (if not crippling) to anyone maintaining low self-esteem.

That’s why I’ve developed the TENNERCISE system, to raise anyone’s self-confidence level and increase their powers of personal performance to achieve their highest and best. Tennercise utilizes components from a myriad of modalities to get you from where you are to where you want to be.

One of the first actions you can take to get a grip on your self-esteem and raise your confidence is to address your

How to be confidant self talk

Self Talk

Self-talk is that voice inside your head, sometimes that still small voice, other times like a roaring lion, insisting that you are unworthy, to be shamed or disrespected in some way or not good enough.

Low self-esteem – as well as high self-confidence – requires constant maintenance. If you’re feeling like you’re not on your game there’s probably a lot of negative programs running in the background to keep you down (or safe). You might ask, how do I banish,

Negative Self Talk

Negative self-talk has to go. It is working hard to keep you down, so you have to man up (or woman up) and claim authority over the source of your lack of self esteem.

Whack a Mole

You have to interrupt the negative self-talk with a quick and effective whack as soon as it rears its ugly head. Whack! How do I whack the negative self-talk mole?

If I’m at home alone, I clap my hands (loudly, creating a little pain) stop… and turn an abrupt about-face. If I’m sitting at a table or desk in view of others, I might flick my ear. In a meeting, I might (literally) bite my tongue.

Mock the Voice

The mole’s voice inside your head can be quite ominous. I find disarming the mole’s voice by reducing it to a funny cartoon baby-like caricature-sounding voice removes all the negativity from the negative thought. Then I make fun of it by repeating it in the silly cartoon voice (using my outside voice or inner voice, whichever is more appropriate at the time) and laugh (or smile) at it. After you’ve don’t this a few times, the next time it pops up, it does so in the revised silly voice (you might not even have to whack it when it shows up in this manner).

Positive Self Talk

Now it’s time to reframe for more positive thinking. Now, in your most authoritative voice, restate the negative as the most positive affirmation that you can conjure up. This is your new positive self-talk. Take note of your new positive reinforcement and use it any time your negative mole-speak pops up. Feel free (you are encouraged to) modify your positive affirmation as you think of ways to make it even more positively reaffirming.

Whacking and disarming your negative self-talking mole can be an excellent method of building self-confidence as you begin to rebuild your new and improved vision of yourself, ready to take on the world.

You can join us in saying,

Look out world

Here I come