If you really want to transform into your highest and best, at some point you’re going to have to say, “Sayonara,” to the Green Eyed Monster. If you are prone to jealousy, this will not reflect well upon the vision of you as it is expressed to onlookers. It’s one of those unfortunate negative emotions that doesn’t look good when anyone wears it on their countenance. Jealousy does not instill faith or respect, except from those where negative vibration is lowest common denominator, for they will revel in your pain and drama and even gaslight, or fan the flames.
Jealousy will be the undoing of most any relationship it touches, if not when it first rears its ugly head, then after a while, when anyone who may be the recipient of it (and possibly onlookers) begin to find ways to distance themselves from you. It imposes a great deal of unnecessary drama and communicates a severe lack of trust.
We all suffer from jealousy to some extent due to the experiences we have gathered along life’s journey. Any loss, pain or injustice you may have endured since birth can contribute to your lack of self-empowerment, leaving you susceptible to getting a jab from the old Green Goblin.
Not to fear, there is hope for overcoming jealousy, if you’re so inclined.
First of all, you need to be enough for you. You have to come to the knowledge and conclusion that your happiness does not depend on any other person. You have to be your own best friend. Sounds simple on the surface, but as you continue to grow and expand you get to know more about yourself better, and if you’re honest, you will begin to see the dark areas of your life that previously were hidden from your consciousness. Love yourself first. Appreciate all you are and have (not what you lack).
Raise your self-esteem and confidence by treating yourself lovingly and treat yourself occasionally, rewarding you for loving yourself. Take yourself on a date, for a spa day; buy a new outfit, bobble or pair of shoes. Start treating yourself well. Don’t wait for someone else to do it. Learn how to be your own support system and set boundaries to take better care of yourself.
Take notice of what the triggers are that set off your jealousy and make a list. When you feel those emotions welling up inside of you, think about what it was that set you off. If you are honest with yourself, you will probably see that there is not a factual foundation for feeling as though you are threatened at this moment in time. It is typical for jealousy to be felt as a highly exaggerated negative state of mind.
If the object of your jealousy is a person, it might be prudent to have a talk with him or her and let them know what they’re doing is setting off your panic button. They may be doing something they are not even aware of, or they could be doing it intentionally to cause this reaction. If they are unaware they are doing something to make you feel as if there may be a impending loss, they might be able to make subtle changes that might make your feel better the next time. If they are doing it maliciously, it might be time to set a boundary.
The more you are honest with yourself and your feelings of inadequacy, and potential struggles with self-confidence or deeply hidden emotions stored from a time long ago (which is like an viral infection, growing until it makes itself apparent on the surface) you will be better equipped to deal with it. This is a major accomplishment in your evolutionary process to defeat your imaginary fears, taking control of your life, and feeling so much better about it.
Regularly review your life and emotional state of being. Are there any emotional weeds growing in the garden of your well being? If you are always keeping an eye out for potential pitfalls, you can tackle whatever comes your way and deal with the negative emotions as they become apparent to your awareness.
Ask yourself what it is about this person that sets you off? Dig deeper and see if it isn’t connected to something that happened earlier in your life. In most cases, you will find a connection that has nothing to do with your current object of concern. Take note of what it is about them that triggers you, then ask yourself if your reaction is justified, or not.
Sometimes you might feel victimized or as if there are no options besides letting yourself succumb to the rabid jealousy. You must get on the other side of this if you are to progress and continue your evolution, so find ways to neutralize your negative emotional state by using prayer, meditation, exercise, tapping or dancing. Whatever it takes find a way to disconnect yourself from the feelings which can overtake you and cause you to falter.
Seek out a friend, associate, or even better someone who will be an unbiased participant, like a counselor or coach who can help you get from here to there.
God bless you.