I Was Betrayed, Lied to, Cheated On, Disrespected, Abandoned

Betrayal in a relationship, especially when it involves infidelity, is a wound that cuts deep, leaving behind a trail of pain, sorrow, and anger. When the unfaithful partner denies their actions, turns the blame onto the betrayed partner, and then abandons the relationship entirely, the hurt is compounded, leading to unresolved feelings that can linger for years. I understand the gravity of such a situation and the emotional turmoil it creates.

The first step in healing is fully acknowledging the pain and the betrayal. It is essential to understand that what you feel—anger, sorrow, even hatred—is valid. You have been wronged profoundly, and your emotions naturally respond to that wound. Allow yourself to grieve the loss of the trust and the relationship you once had. It’s essential to give yourself permission to feel every emotion without judgment.

Forgiveness does not mean condoning the actions of the unfaithful spouse or allowing them back into your life under the same terms. Rather, forgiveness is about freeing yourself from the heavy burden of hatred and resentment. Jesus teaches us to forgive, not as a favor to those who have wronged us, but as a way to liberate our own hearts and souls. Holding on to anger and bitterness only prolongs your suffering. Forgiveness is a process, and it may take time, but it is a crucial step towards healing.

Looking at the situation from a higher perspective can bring a sense of tolerance and compassion for the one who betrayed you. It’s possible that your partner acted in the only way they knew how, based on their own life experiences, hidden traumas, and spiritual limitations. While their actions were undoubtedly hurtful, they may have acted out of unresolved pain or confusion that has nothing to do with you. It’s essential to recognize that each person’s journey is unique, and we may never fully understand why someone does what they do. By cultivating compassion, even for those who have wronged us, we can begin to release the grip that the past has on our hearts and open ourselves to healing.

It is natural to want justice when you have been wronged, and many turn to prayer, asking God to bring consequences upon the unfaithful spouse. While the desire for justice is understandable, it’s important to remember that God’s ways are higher than ours. Instead of focusing on what you want to happen to the one who betrayed you, consider praying for your own healing and peace. Trust that divine justice will prevail in its own time and way, and shift your focus towards your own well-being.

Holding onto the past keeps you energetically tied to the person who hurt you. This attachment can prevent you from moving forward and finding peace. Through prayer, meditation, and affirmations, work on releasing the past and cutting those energetic ties. Visualize yourself surrounded by divine light, and imagine those ties dissolving in that light. As you do this, you may feel a sense of relief and a newfound freedom to create a future unburdened by past pain.

Betrayal can shatter one’s sense of self and leave you questioning your worth. This is a time to reconnect with yourself on a deeper level. Engage in practices that nurture your soul, whether spending time in nature, practicing mindfulness, or pursuing creative outlets. Reflect on your values, passions, and the person you want to become. This journey of self-discovery is an opportunity to rebuild your life on a foundation that is stronger and more aligned with your true self.

You do not have to walk this path alone. Surround yourself with a supportive community, whether it’s friends, family, or a church group. Consider seeking professional counseling to help you navigate through your emotions. An awakening relationship coach can provide a unique perspective, helping you to integrate spiritual practices with emotional healing. Sharing your story with others who have experienced similar betrayals can also be a source of comfort and strength.

Above all, remember that you are deeply loved by God. This love is unconditional and unwavering, even in the face of betrayal. Lean into that divine love, allowing it to fill the empty spaces in your heart. As you do, you will find that the actions of another do not diminish your capacity to love and be loved; rather, it is expanded through your connection with the Divine.

Betrayal is a painful chapter in your life, but it does not have to define your story. Through applying the love of Jesus mindset, acknowledging your pain, practicing forgiveness, releasing the past, and embracing your own journey of self-discovery, you can find healing and peace. Trust in the process, seek support and remember that God’s love is always with you, guiding you toward a future filled with hope and joy.

 

Infidelity Unrequited Love Abandonment Prison

Your fiancé left you. She chose her vice over you. You are feeling the pain of loss, betrayal, infidelity, unrequited love, abandonment, prison of your own making, and you are dramatically overwhelmed. She left without a word. No explanation no goodbye, only brash accusations that you were the one at fault. Because you love her, you are in pain.

You start asking yourself, “Why?”

    • Why would she leave?
    • Why would she choose this vice over you and your love?
    • Why would she lie, cheat, and steal?

Then you start questioning your part in all this.

    • What did I do?
    • What did I not do?
    • Was it something I said?
    • Something I did?

Because you still love her, and there was little or no closure, you still want to reach out to her, leading to more questions,

    • Can I help her?
    • Is there hope for us?
    • Can we overcome this together?
    • Will she open up and talk to me?

Your questions are met with silence.

What next?

From here on out, it’s your turn to end this story.

You’ve taken it upon yourself to hire an investigator who has confirmed the severity of her infidelity and its power over her. You have some data and information about her life as a sex worker as the result of your investigation. You have photos, license plate numbers, maps, and a list of over 150 addresses where she has exercised her right to engage in her vices. You know exactly what devices and programs she uses, what methods she uses, how long she entertains her clients, and what menu of services she provides. You know how much she charges (and when she does charity work), how she collects the finances, and how she deals with it.

You know she has kept this vice a secret for years, since before you came along.

You know,

    • She is not going to open up to you.
    • You cannot save her.
    • She hasn’t wasted a thought on you.
    • She doesn’t care about how you feel about her.
    • She doesn’t care about how you feel about yourself.

She doesn’t care about you, at all.

Whether there was a time that she did or not is insignificant.

Yet, here you are, day after day, going over every detail, every nuance, every piece of data, every imaginary recreation of her being with others, then with you afterward on a regular basis while you were together. Imagining what she has done since, and continues to do every day.

This is your prison of your own making.

You blame her for it, but you’ve constructed it for yourself in her name.

Every moment that you spend in this prison is on you. You created the prison.

You are your judge. You are your jailer.

You’ve created the rule of your restraint and containment.

Once you know this, it can come as no surprise that it is you who holds the keys to your prison.

And when the day comes that you are done punishing yourself in her name, you can take the keys, open the door and set yourself free.

When you do, forgive yourself for sentencing and punishing yourself in this way, all the while knowing that you suffered in the name of love. Even though it was unrequited and painful.

You loved. Your love was true. Your love was pure.

But it’s over now.

With your newfound freedom, you will be able to start your new life.

A new life with a new world of possibilities.

What about her? What about forgiveness?

Unnecessary. Though you might require to do this act of forgiving for yourself, your own mental wellness, but not for her.

She is happy. She is living her life the way that makes her feel good. She loved the life she had with you, she would have loved being married to you and being a secret sex worker, but she knows that if you knew, that would never work for you. So, she left.

She continues to do this work that gives her life meaning. It is not about you, never was.

You may feel awful about you being at opposing ends of this scenario, but no one is wrong, here.

Yes, she accepts a certain degree of risk for engaging in illegal activity, which is illegal at the moment, but know that laws are changing and the decriminalization of sex workers is in the works as you are reading these words.

No judgment. Forgiveness may be necessary for the transgressions against you, but not for her life choice(s).

Most sex workers are people who have experienced severe trauma in their past, and this activity helps mitigate the damages of their past, and these victims are doing whatever they can to feel a little better.

You might act out like this, but you are not her.

After all, we’re all doing the best we can with what we have.

The least you could do is to allow her the same respect that you would expect if you were in her shoes.

Let her go with God’s blessings.

Let it be.