Tag: opposition

Massive Polarization Is Google the Culprit?

Interestingly, I have a couple in my office with relationship issues. While they were conversing, they came to a fork in the road. “How about this?” says the husband, “Let’s Google it.” Both of them, the husband and the wife typed the same query into Google’s search engine and reviewed their results.

Based on their own individual Google search results, they were now equipped for a full-on battle of completely opposing views, thanks to Google.

In Google’s defense, Google is smart. It is nearly sentient. It knows each user, the device they are using, where they are located, and who is in or nearby their current vicinity. What communication languages, formats, providers, and locations they use. More importantly, what they like and what they don’t like about anything down to the most minute detail.

In this case, Google knows that the husband is likely to click on Google search results that will align with the opinions of his macho friends, while his wife is more likely to click on more positive links that reflect the ideas of her friends that see themselves as peace-loving but highly opinionated about what is right and what is wrong.

Same query: Opposing results.

Still, again in the defense of Google, Google is personalizing search results based on the user. That is hugely smart.

On the other hand, Google is perpetuating the one thing that I think is the biggest problem in our society today. Separation. The polar opposition of individuals in the proximity of each other.

Before the proliferation of Google and its manipulation of data and the people who access said data, people self-sequestered themselves into groups of like-mindedness. You could pretty much tell that if a person lived here, or there, they probably had a particular political view or bent.

Here, today, is a perfect example of two people in the most intimate of relationships, almost at each other’s throats, and here I am, watching the entire thing play out before my very eyes.

And this is what is destroying the United States if not the Internet-connected world as well. There is more angst and hate in the world than ever before.

Why?

Not because of Google, though Google does help to feed the fire, for whatever reason.

The biggest problem in the world today, is Judgment. I’m right, you’re wrong.

(Here comes the coding IF/THEN/ELSE routine.)

IF you don’t agree with me, you are wrong.

THEN I must do everything in my power to convert you to my way of thinking because you are wrong.

ELSE you are my enemy and you must be made to suffer some unfortunate fate, if not death, which may be the preferred price to pay for not thinking like me.

Oh, and it gets worse, THE GOLDEN STANDARD, “If you see someone not thinking like you and you do nothing, you are just as guilty as the faulty thinker, and you, too, must be outcast or punished accordingly.”

As an Olympian Life Coach, when I meet with a client, the client does not come into my world. Before the client ever enters the building, I’ve created a safe sanctuary, a sacred space, for that client to come in and be seated. Then I enter the room.

When I enter the room, I humbly and respectfully enter the client’s world. There is nothing for the client to defend. I have no preconceived expectations or judgments. I have respect and honor this person to be who he or she is at whatever stage of life he or she may be in.

I avail myself to the client to help him or her make his or her way through life, and in the best case scenario for me, because this is my mission in life, to help him or her achieve his or her highest and best, and make the world a better place.

That is all. I don’t have any agenda. No path to make them follow. They are the masters of their own lives and missions. My only function is to assist them so that they can accomplish whatever they might like to in this life.

And having this kind of attitude, which also carries over into all other areas of my life as well, I get access to the greatest data and information, that no one (or very few) people in the world ever get to know. My world is so diverse and colorful, I am utterly amazed and gracious every day.

Granted, some of the data, I could do without the knowledge of, but nonetheless, I have a better understanding of how diverse life can be, and I know things that would never make it to the media. I also feel as though I am blessed to be in this (maybe not so) enviable position.

Still, here I am, surrounded by, “YOU DON’T THINK LIKE ME, SO

        • “get thee behind me.” Or alternatively, “go away.”
        • “I hate you!”
        • “you lost your job. Ha!”
        • “you can’t eat here!”
        • “you are not entitled to a helping hand.”
        • “you cannot attend.”
        • “you can’t play.”
        • “you cannot be healed.”
        • “you will go to hell.”
        • “you must die.”

I see the multicolored fanciful beauty of a loving world that welcomed others with open arms, turned into a monochrome planet of THIS or THAT or ELSE, and it breaks my heart.

On that day, I looked out at the world and said, “I am sorry, there is no love in them.” And I wept.

But I tried, and I will never stop, while I still have the breath of life in me.

There is hope. Not only for this couple, but the world.

And there are others that believe… are you one of them?

 

Keep Em Separated

That is the entire agenda, to keep em separated. And I’d say it was a hidden agenda if it wasn’t so obvious. But was isn’t obvious for someone would appear to be hidden to someone else. It all starts soon after entry to the planet, especially if you are born into a family with other offspring.

The oldest sibling asserts his or her superiority, or the youngest exercises his or her ability to manipulate “the system” for his or her benefit.

“Mom! She’s touching me!” and endless cries of judgment, unfairness, victimization, and disrespect, then the cries for assistance and the attempt to demand justice and equality. “Stop him! He got the bigger half!” In an attempt to quell the disturbance, the more dominant parent demands that the squabbling siblings be separated. On and on it goes.

You would think that after we’ve grown old enough to leave the home and establish our own independence, we would grow out of such violent opposition.

As we enter adulthood many social mechanisms are pervasive in society to keep us separated from those we share the planet with including the news, other media, and even social media as well.

HEADLINES, IMAGES, and BOTS, Oh My!

There are forces who hire people to keep em separated, though most of us fall into the trap of promoting the separation for free for many psychological reasons, some deeply affected wounds or trauma fueling the angst to promote separation at all costs.

Headlines are made to appear as shocking and polarizing as possible to keep the hate rate rising. Even if the content actually contradicts the headline. This is an old newspaper-selling trick that still works today for the invaluable click-bait and increases the possibility that your misrepresented or fake news goes viral.

Images are easily altered to appear even more shocking than the original using manipulation methods made famous by the program, “Photoshop” which is now synonymous with the term for altered images. As these methods improve over time, it has become so difficult to detect an original photo from an altered photo that you are likely to suspect that any normal photo has been photoshopped.

And it’s not just people. Now there are automatically AI-programmed bots scouring the Internet looking for people to poke and disrespect just to raise your enthusiasm for supporting the separation, and they’re not even real people, just programs pretending to be people.

Internal Examination

Let’s just take an internal examination, checking with your inner self, or higher self if you dare, and ask yourself, “How do I feel inside when I watch the news?” Then ask yourself about the other forms of media that you expose yourself to. How do they make you feel?

Do they make you feel like you’re doing really good work in the world? Do you feel like you’re sharing positive/loving energy with like-minded people? Does this media exposure fill your heart full of love? Are you in the habit of letting that love overflow into the community and the world around you?

If you answered, “Yes,” to these questions, then congratulations, you are doing great.

If not, you might want to have another look at how your exposure is serving you. Maybe it is not in your best interest. Only you can determine this.

Since the media you are exposed to is probably programmed to make you feel bad and especially bad about someone or something else, you are more than likely feeling something that will feel like the opposite of healthy and lovingly.

It might be something you might want to take a look at.

Do It Right and Face Opposition

You’re going along in life, gathering like-minded friends and supporters along the way, and invariably, you will encounter the occasional individual who may not have your best interests at heart.

These are the relationships which cause you to grow, change, and encourages you to do the deep inner work necessary for your further expansion and exploration of the unlimited possibilities which are availing themselves to you.

You will encounter the occasional Judas, Benedict, psychopath, or horde of haters who will seek to betray, attack, knock you down, or cause you to stumble or second-guess yourself. All of this is uncomfortable, potentially unbearable, and if you face it in strength and honor, you will grow.

Being attacked and opposed means you’re probably doing it right. So, continue to do it right and face opposition. Acknowledge it, but don’t let is keep you from living a better life, your best life, and making the world a better place.

You may align yourself with people whom you love, trust and support who will sneak around to do dirt behind your back, and while the trust betrayal hurts, cuts like a knife, don’t give up.

And remember this; he or she is not your enemy. If you are dealing with a psychopath (or some other predator on the Antisocial Personality Disorder Spectrum) this person may hope to be labeled as your enemy, he or she is not.

Do your best not to engage in battle with someone whose intent is to stop your work or ministry, to keep you from achieving your highest and best. Ignore them. You are better than that.

You never have to respond to someone’s rude comments or false accusations. To do so would only be a distraction. Haters are gonna hate, and you will be challenged, betrayed, or threatened along the way in an attempt to keep you from accomplishing your mission.

There will be those who will try to knock you down and others may join in the kicking you while you are down. It’s an unfortunate display of our barbarian human nature to revel in the weakened condition of someone who weild(ed) great potential otherwise. These attacks are usually accompanied with a resounding, “Not so cocky now, are you?”

Even those whom you regard as your closest friend, confidant, partner, or lover may not be as supportive as you might think. You will encounter the occasional individual who has only his or her best interests at heart, and you will find them exiting your paradigm at the worst possible time, leaving you to wonder what happened?

Some people will just be playing along to get everything that they can, just to take what they can and run off to hide it away or promote their own agenda, sometimes at your expense.

A good partner is hard to find, and you will find yourself in these challenges because the work you are doing, the life you are leading, your mission is progressively leading edge love-technology which is approaching the tipping point between where the human race is today and where it will be tomorrow.

There are a great many people, including the most powerful and influential people on this planet, who desire nothing more than to see you falter, question yourself, throw you off balance, even destroy you, if you cannot easily be distracted, angered, or otherwise compromised.

You are in the process of metamorphosis. You are expanding into the greatest version of yourself, and the “powers that be” want to quash your efforts at every opportunity. People with low self-esteem will seek to make themselves feel a little better by attacking you, while minions will attempt to profit from your efforts.

Bless those who try to stand in your way because they are only doing the best they can with what they have. Continue to progress and grow in love, in the realization that if you were that person, having lived the life that he or she has lived up to that point, you would have said or done the very same thing.

It’s not about you, it’s about them. So, don’t take it personally, no matter how personal it feels.

You are the champion of the burgeoning evolution of humanity. The day will come when all of this will change, and you are part of the change.

Keep moving forward with dignity and grace. This is your highest and best work, be your highest and best you.

Don’t let them get to you and keep doing the good work.

The world needs you, now more than ever.

For more information, see: Trust Betrayal dot com.

How to Not Take It Personally

When you see that person who is calm, in a state of zen, and nothing seems to bother them, you think, “What the hell is wrong with that person?”

What you might find, is that they have mastered the idea that nothing is personal. They don’t seem to get uptight (much) and stuff just seems to roll off their back, as they don’t get overanxious or take things personally. They embrace the idea that things are as they are and that’s okay.

You, too, could begin living a life free from the angst of others, because, after all, people will disagree with you, even scheme to trip you up, or try to make you look as if you’re overreacting in front of peers or coworkers, just to prove they can.

Rather than react, you could opt to stop taking things personally and take away their superpower in an instant.

First of all, make a list of the things that piss you off (you know the people that piss you off have this list, shouldn’t you?). Next, review the list. What do yo find? Look for the key components that bother you (this can be an exciting journey in self-discovery, as you find the things that irk you the most often are related to key life moments in your past – or early childhood – torturing you in the present).

Try to look at the issue from other perspectives and think about how a particular thing or topic that carries with it a powerful negative charge and ask, “Does it really matter?” In the scope of the life and times of the human race, many a mountain has been made of molehills, just to cause division between peoples, when in reality, very little is truly meaningful. And when you think of it, nothing has meaning, except for the meaning that you give it.

 

Take a look at celebrities, politicians and other public figures that take massive stands, expecting others to conform to their point of view. How is that working for them?

I discovered long ago, you are more likely to get someone to see from your perspective if you love and accept them just they way they are without expectation, rather than entering into a heated debate or brow-beating them.

If community or global issues get you riled up, realize whatever it is, is not happening to your, personally. Position yourself as a supporter instead of a protester. Protesters (those who expend a great deal of energy in opposition to something) actually add more energy to the thing they are standing against, strengthening the very thing they don’t want. On the other hand, supporters put their energies toward what they do want (the solution) thereby increasing its effectiveness.

Remember that life is what it is. It takes all kinds of people to make the world go ’round, and start making room in your psyches to allow others to be as they are. Take the position of the observer rather than the enforcer. It’s not your job to control others, so try to find opportunities to sit back, relax, and enjoy the show.

As you are growing into a more tolerant lifestyle, embracing who you are without having to have anyone conform to your personal standards, you may begin to see others doing the same thing. Finding opportunities to spend time in their proximity will make your allowance grow even more.

Does that mean life will be rosy? No, not really. You can wear all the rose-colored glasses you want, and still, people you trusted will fall short of the mark, those you love will hurt your feelings, and you will do likewise (either intentionally, or not). This is a fact of life. Do your best to realize that it is what it is, any tr not to judge others (or yourself) too harshly when it becomes apparent.

How can you disarm those who would like to attack you, or put you down?

Easy, don’t give them any ammunition. When you practice tolerance, there is no opposition. When you can wrap your head around that everything and everyone is perfectly fine just the way they are and no one is right or wrong, allowing for differing opinions, what is there to fight against? Nothing.

And what about your idea of truth? Do you find yourself being defensive, fighting for what you believe? Well, just sit back and think about it… Where did you get this idea of truth? Did someone plant the idea, or did it originate from within your own mind, with your own reasoning and rationale? Then review all the things you strongly believed in… Has your belief changed over time? In most cases, truth and what we believe does change over time, as new information becomes available. It’s inevitable. Things change. So cut yourself some slack and admit to yourself, “This is what I believe to be true at this moment in time.” Based on the information at hand. Who knows what you might believe tomorrow.

Have good intentions and hold yourself to the standard of the Hippocratic Oath, “to do no harm.”

Stop adding energy to the bad things that are brought to your attention. If you see something bad in the media, switch it off, change the channel, refuse to engage in it. Just the welling up of negative emotion within you makes those things that you dislike more powerful. Avoid all negativity.

When people are acting poorly, it is not up to you to try to change them, punish them, or make them feel bad. Do not talk about them behind their back or try to ridicule them for their actions, confront them or offer them advice.

If you find yourself in close proximity and a confrontation is unavoidable, try to speak your peace with lighthearted humor, remembering that it’s not about you. When someone is in opposition of you and you find yourself in an uncomfortable situation, keep in mind that this person is acting out because of their own inner demons. It has nothing to do with you. In fact, it can be somewhat of a blessing that you were chosen to participate, because the more tolerant, new you, is less likely to fight and more likely to understand and have empathy for the person who is acting out. Try to put yourself in their shoes.

If you don’t like haters, don’t be one. How hard is that? Only share positive support and do not put others down, not for anything. After all, aren’t we all just doing the best we can with what we have?

If yo have an opinion or want to share some factual data, please do so, but share your information humbly, without the expectation that anyone should believe you or conform to your thought patterns. Think of it more like planting seeds. Share your information and allow it to take root and grow on its own, or not.

Practice the Golden Rule (Jesus’ sermon on the mount, Matthew 7:12) by treating others as you would like to be treated.

Congratulations, you are on your way to the tolerant new you, who doesn’t take things personally, because it’s not. Everything and everyone just is as it is, and that’s okay.