what do you do | David M Masters

As integrous as I try to be, even I may say one thing and do another. For the longest time, I thought the one thing I would like to have etched in my gravestone would be the words, “Here lies a man who kept his words and lived by them.” Yet, even I can see that even I fall short, if I am able to see myself objectively. This leaves you wondering, “Why people say one thing and do another?”

The Human Condition: A Complex Contradiction

People are never exactly as they appear to be. Even if you think you know someone deeply, including their life story, you can never truly understand everything going on in their mind or heart. Each of us is a tangle of contradictions, living, breathing examples of incongruence.

Even with the best intentions, life sometimes prevents us from being perfectly aligned with our words and actions.

Everyday Contradictions

Our Words

We all make promises or commitments that don’t always pan out.

- “I’ll be there at four,” but you arrive at 4:05 or 3:55.
- “I’ll pick up everything on the list,” yet you forget the milk.

These small deviations from our words may seem inconsequential, but they reveal how difficult it is to stay perfectly aligned with what we say.

Our Contracts

Contracts and agreements are another area rife with contradictions.

- You agree to make timely payments on a loan but occasionally miss a due date.
- You pledge love and fidelity in marriage but end up in divorce court.

Even legal commitments are subject to human fallibility, highlighting how life’s unpredictability often disrupts our intentions.

Our Lives

The contradictions in how we live are perhaps the most glaring.

- Someone may value health and self-care yet overindulge in junk food and neglect exercise.
- A person who lives in chaos might maintain an immaculate home.
- Someone may wear sports apparel but never participate in physical activity.

These contradictions illustrate how our lives often deviate from the ideals we claim to uphold.

The Paradox of Hypocrisy

One of the most confusing contradictions is when people criticize or accuse others of behavior they themselves are guilty of. It’s not uncommon for someone to say, “I would never do that,” while doing exactly what they claim to abhor.

Even more baffling are those who accuse others of actions they are actively engaged in themselves. This form of projection creates confusion and mistrust, leaving us wondering how anyone can reconcile such blatant contradictions.

Why These Contradictions Happen

The truth is, contradictions are an inherent part of being human. Our minds, emotions, and lives are not linear or perfectly aligned. We are influenced by countless internal and external factors, from unconscious triggers to societal pressures and personal insecurities.

For example:

- You may see yourself as a kind and loving person, yet catch yourself judging others or ignoring those outside your immediate circle.
- You may value honesty but find yourself telling a white lie to avoid conflict.

Recognizing these incongruencies can help you uncover the triggers that lead to contradictions in your life.

The Path to Coherence

Once you become aware of your own contradictions, you face a choice:

1. Make Changes: Take steps to align your words, actions, and beliefs more closely.
2. Redefine Yourself: Adjust your self-perception to include the variations and inconsistencies that make you human.

This decision is what separates those who seek to live a life of alignment from those who remain content with their contradictions.

People who pursue coherence regularly self-evaluate and make adjustments to minimize incongruencies. They strive to live harmoniously, knowing that while perfection is impossible, progress is achievable.

Are You One of Them?

Do you know people who say one thing but do another? Are you one of them? If you’re honest, you’ll likely find that you are. We all are, to some degree.

Recognizing this truth isn’t about self-judgment—it’s about self-awareness. By acknowledging our inconsistencies, we gain the power to grow, adapt, and become more aligned with our values.

What’s a Good Example?

Think of the friend who preaches the importance of a healthy lifestyle but skips the gym and orders fast food. Or the colleague who talks about teamwork but hoards credit for success. These everyday examples remind us how common and natural contradictions are.

That said,

Understanding why people say one thing but do another helps us see the humanity in ourselves and others. Life is messy, and perfection is an illusion. Instead of judging, let’s strive to recognize our contradictions, learn from them, and move closer to the coherence we desire.

By doing so, we not only live more authentically but also inspire others to do the same. Let’s embrace our flaws and contradictions as part of the journey toward a more aligned, harmonious life.

What’s a good example of people say one thing and do another?

Everything revolves around your answers to the two questions every person you meet asks you, “Who are you? What do you do?”

When you’ve decided to take a stand or make your mark, you will be miles ahead doing the preliminary work of creating a platform to support yourself along the way, so prepare for exponential success.

Who Are You?

To start off, you must define who you are. Of course, you know who you are, but how are people who don’t know you going to know who you are and what you do? Lets stat with who you are.

Try to encapsulate in a few paragraphs your life as it has led until now. No need to go into great detail, but be certain to include key elements which helped develop you into the person you are today. Don’t worry if you think your life has been lackluster or unglamorous. If you think your life was awful, look at these famous celebrities who suffered prior to achieving their highest and best.

Be brief, but transparent. Enquiring people want to know you have a history, and who knows? Your story may be incredibly inspiring for someone else.

What Do You Do?

This is the second question anyone asks you, so be ready with a one-sentence answer about what you do which sets you apart from anyone else. But before you answer this question, you will be miles ahead, if you know your purpose, message, passion, and mission (PMPM). I know many people who were forever known as one thing because they were not congruent with their PMPM at the time they were visited by media exposure and lived to regret it.

Armed with a clear sense of who you are and what your PMPM is, you can go about the work of creating your congruent unique identity, which we refer to as your brand.

Let’s take a brief look at what this might look like. Let’s say, for instance, you are a man who was raised in an urban neighborhood where cats over-populated the area. But you admired the cats, not far from being homeless yourself, as a young child, you could imagine what it might be like to be a disadvantaged cat. You could relate to them, you had compassion for them.

Then, one day, you visited your grandmother in a nursing home, to you, she seemed to be in a crowded facility, yet alone, not unlike a cat. So, one day you brought a cat from the neighborhood, “Scruffy,” one that you had nurtured to health, and gifted it to your grandmother.

It changed your grandmother’s life and the two of them, the grandmother and Scruffy lived out their lives together in joyous harmony. This was when you realized what your mission in life was to be.

Who Are You?

I’m JAG, just a guy who was raised in a neighborhood overrun by cats, but I loved them and became known as the Man Who Saves Cats.

What Do You Do?

I’m a Feline Rescue Engineer and as the Man Who Saves Cats, I match disadvantaged cats with people whose lives can be enhanced by the love and affection a cat can give.

Add to these a simple 30-second elevator speech, which you have practiced and can quickly recite verbatim and you are almost there because you’ll want to make sure you…

Buy the Dot-Com

In my Branding Masters seminars, a key component of capitalizing on those brief moments in time when the planets align, and you have a few seconds to capitalize on your media exposure, the dot-com makes all the difference. So, having the dot com which represents who you are and what you do (if at all possible. If not, keep reinventing, until you can find an available and catchy dot-com) is so important.

Properly prepared and positioned you can fulfill your life’s mission with expanded efficacy by laying the proper groundwork. Then, if you ever find yourself in front of a microphone, for even the briefest of moments, you can take advantage of that moment in time to expand the reach of your mission, even more.

Even if you are a witness to an unrelated freak accident or disaster, the interviewer will ask those two questions. If your answer includes “Man Who Saves Cats” and “Feline Rescue Engineer” and you own those dot-coms, and have information on those websites delineating who you are, what your mission is, and how people can join you in your mission, you’ve grasped the ultimate brass ring.

If this happens to you, and you are prepared, people will mob rush

manwhosavescats.com
and
felinerescueengineer.com

You will see your web servers explode with web traffic, your email servers will smoke, and your phone will ring off-the-hook if you’ve taken these preliminary steps. This man could easily then launch the Ultimate Pet Rescue.

You can also take the necessary steps to increase your credibility as a source and expert in your field. See: Where is Your Credibility?

If you are prepared in this way, when good fortune is visited upon you, others will see it as an instant overnight success, as if lightning had struck, never knowing that you had carefully laid the groundwork to ensure your success in the event of such a lightning strike.

Elsewise, you will have been just another nameless face on the TV, forever remembering that moment, when had you been prepared, could have made all the difference in the world. These moments are very difficult, if not impossible, to recreate.

When lightning strikes will you be ready?