Why Everything in My Life is Going Wrong

You know what I mean: That chaotic point in your life when you raise your hands, look up at the sky and ask yourself, “Why is everything in my life going wrong?” It’s frustrating and can be very painful to be at the place when I wonder why everything in my life is going wrong.

This crazy part of life, which doesn’t seem to make any sense to you at the time, is a lot less crazy than you might think.

If I want to know why everything in my life is going wrong, I know that it will probably be impossible to see from my perspective. When things are not making sense, when everything seems out of sorts, and it appears that nothing is going right, I know there’s something going on that I am not aware of.

It’s in these times when we need to get out of our heads, into our hearts, and do a love-scan of the area to see if we can get a sense of what is going on that is trying to get our attention.

It might be a good time to see a coach, consultant, or counselor (anyone from a friend, member of clergy, or professional; whatever suits you and/or your budget at the time) to help you see the bigger picture.

Perspective is everything. If I’m lost in the woods (or maybe I’ve made a comfortable spot for myself in the woods because I’m proactive, like that) I might not be able to see what is calling me just beyond the trees.

There may be tremendous opportunities well within my reach, but I can’t see it through the trees. So, I make due and find ways to be comfortable and happy where I am.

Not a bad thing, unless you have lured into complacency and forgotten about your journey to achieve your highest and best, or your decision to live a better life, your best life, and make the world a better place.

If so, there comes a time when the convenience of just maintaining the status quo no longer serves you, when the higher part of yourself, God, and all the angels know you are not rising to your calling. People may be suffering, and may even die, who are unable to hear your message.

Your message. That unique song that only you can sing, which can break through all the barriers and wounds of the past which might be suffocating the life of others who desperately need to hear it.

The more experience I have with life, its signs and signals, I can have a better idea of why everything in my life is going wrong. It probably means that I am not in alignment with my purpose, message, passion, and mission (PMPM) in life.

Life can get like that. You can get so focused on and burdened with the everyday affairs of life, which can be very overwhelming, making you feel like all you’re doing all day long is just putting out fires and hope to god you have enough energy to put out tomorrow’s fires.

If the fury of life gets too hectic it can feel so overwhelming and unmanageable that you might consider an early checkout. Many people, when they reach this chaotic juncture of life, volunteer to pull the plug, contemplate suicide, opting out of any potential benefit they may have been able to bring to the world.

It breaks my heart when someone isn’t able to see the immense value they can bring to the world. For every seven or eight suicide attempts, one of them wakes up to his or her calling, and one successfully completes his or her journey.

There are many reasons why someone might want to end his or her journey prematurely. The basic rationale is when the pain of being alive is greater than the relief from not having to suffer one more day, suicide may appear to be an attractive option.

Sometimes, even I might contemplate taking my life if I didn’t know why everything in my life is going wrong. Now I know why everything in my life is going wrong. It’s my wake-up call.

If only we all could know when it seems like nothing is going right, it might be a clear indication that something is wrong. Maybe you are in the wrong place, doing the wrong thing, when something far better is calling you away from what seems safe, comfortable, or (god forbid) “normal.”

You have a higher calling, and if it seems like nothing is going right, there’s a good chance that something far more amazing is beckoning you to join it somewhere outside your comfort zone.

If so, the sooner you are able to recognize it and start making the changes necessary to embrace your calling, your suffering will continue, and you will see even more things going wrong.

It’s up to you.

It’s time for a change. Most likely a big, uncomfortable change. You can do this. And you don’t have to do it alone.

Get a better perspective. Find out what’s just beyond your knowingness, and start making plans to move on, up and out of where you are into your more empowered and passionate self, achieving your highest and best.

Why Do I Keep Attracting Jerks?

Here we go again, the end of yet another relationship, and things have not turned out the way you wanted. You start to question what’s wrong with you and ask, “Why do I keep attracting jerks?” or the wrong lovers?

Here’s the answer. First off, there are some things in play, that once to recognize it, will help you get a handle on what is happening. This knowledge will help you make the necessary adjustments as you entertain the idea of finding a suitable love interest.

There is a lot of talk about chemistry between two people, which is likened to a like-mindedness or sense of familiarity which makes it easy to be attracted to or fall in love with someone with whom you feel this “chemistry.” While this sounds well and good, the actual chemistry that is going on is quite contrary to what you’re thinking it is.

Chemistry is not compatibility, chemistry is the chemical reaction that’s triggered by the release of the love hormone cocktail send rushing through your brain, hijacking your mind and your body. The same thing happens when you take a hit of cocaine.

You are high (literally) and understandably not in the proper frame of mind to make rational choices. Although, things will be exciting and fun for as long as the level of this chemical reaction is sustained at a fairly high intensity.

Unfortunately, the chemistry declines and fades over time, and at some point, you start to sober up and see things more clearly. This is when you start to notice inconsistencies that you couldn’t see earlier because you were basically love-stoned out of your mind.

What triggers your love cocktail?

Many things come into play for triggering the release of your love cocktail, normally it’s a combination of your survival instinct which is attracted to physiological strength and hints of financial and social success, either in his or her present state or projected into the future. That’s on one hand.

On the other hand, you are also triggered by your past, an attraction smoothie blended of childhood trauma, focus on unresolved issues with a dysfunctional parental relationship, and the history of your life. This attraction smoothie will have you triggered by the worst possible person for you.

What?

Okay, actually this is the best person for you; not for a love-relationship, but for your personal growth. When you feel the onslaught of your overwhelming personal chemistry engaging, it’s a pretty sure sign that something unpleasant is ahead.

People come into your life for one of two reasons.

As a Lesson

You attract toxic people who are necessary for you to learn something that you wouldn’t be able to see in any other way. If you close off the idea of issues that need to be dealt with or changes you need to make, the dysfunction increases until you crack.

Running, claiming you’ve been victimized yet again, and hiding yourself away only offers a temporary pause in the process. When you are ready to re-engage in life again, here he or she comes again. Why?

You can break the cycle by looking within, asking yourself why. If you’re unable to see any changes that would be beneficial for you to make within yourself and your own life, then inviting a third-party, a coach, counselor, or clergy to help you uncover the areas in your life that could be better.

The Lesson-people are there for your highest and best, even though it feels like the opposite at the moment when you are overwhelmed with the pain of the toxicity.

As a Blessing

Other people are attracted to you to be supportive, to help you maintain a level keel throughout the crazy that life throws at you. These are your (angels) friends who will be there for a season, as they move in and out of your life, while a select few will be there for longer periods of time (sometimes a lifetime).

So, instead of your first reaction toward someone that makes you feel bad, do not focus your attention on the act, situation, or circumstance which causes you to feel angst or as though you’ve been victimized, look inside yourself.

Ask yourself, “Why?”

“What can I do to deal with the issues of my past, or changes I can make in myself to neutralize this challenge once and for all?”

The answer is the key to your liberty, breaking free from the cycle, and a better self-aware life filled with love and happiness.

The greatest love of all awaits and starts with you.

Why Bad Things Happen to Good People

Ever sit back in your easy chair and wonder, “Why bad things happen to good people?” You might know the best person, who lives a good life, gives in service to others, supports friends, family, strangers and the community with loving kindness, yet here they are; amidst a life crisis that no one should have to bear.

You might know this person so well, you might be sitting in his or her chair right now wondering why bad things happen to good people. You’re a good person. It’s not like you do anything wrong to other people. You’re a good and faithful servant. You’re growing and expanding every day, yet here you are face-to-face with the most incredible challenge; one you would not wish on your worst enemy.

As hard as it might be to fathom the idea when you’re amidst the storm of a life trial, there is a divine thread which connects all issues in life to lead us to our highest and best potential. You are blessed with opportunities to grow and change throughout your life, leading through various stages of metamorphosis as you continue on your life’s journey.

If you are WAY out of your comfort zone, feel severely challenged, overwhelmed, or find yourself sinking into a depressive state, chances are you’re facing a huge growth spurt on the other side of this time in your life. If you choose to embrace it.

You could, on the other hand, turn from it, not rise up to the challenge, and give in to the idea of accepting your lot in life as a mere mortal; a victim of life.

Or you can post up and ready yourself for battle, face the challenge head on, and emerge the victor, an inspiration for others who might be facing similar circumstances. The choice is yours, whether you accept the invitation to grow or to submit yourself to being victimized by life circumstances.

This is why it appears that bad things happen to good people. But if you can step back and look at bad things that have happened to good people, you see that some of the greatest, most inspirational stories have come from people who have overcome insurmountable odds, the worst imaginable things no person should ever have to bear. In this respect, there are no bad things, only challenges which are opportunities for growth (sometimes, enormous growth).

So, here you are. Possibly facing a circumstance that is impossible to imagine. You haven’t done anything to deserve this, yet here you are.

What will you do when faced with this challenge?

Sure, this would have taken out anyone else with a heart in a heartbeat. But what about the next person. Is it possible that your story, the story about how you faced, battled and defeated this dragon, going to save the life of someone else who may find themselves facing a similar dragon in the future?

Believe me, I know people who have done just that; they have looked fear, suffering, false accusations, physical and psychological trauma, and death, in the eye and definitively stated, “I will not let you take me out.”

Then, pick up their metaphoric sword and conduct the grueling hand-to-hand battle, emerging victorious, and lived to tell their story.

And I can tell you, people who have gone through such a transformative process are very different people than they once were. The person who comes out on the other side, even if they engaged in the battle and it may have appeared to us (the exterior witnesses) they lost the battle, the warrior is nonetheless transformed and has grown so much from the process.

Does that mean you have to fight every battle? No. You get to choose the battles you engage in, so pick your battles wisely, and in doing so, you can help to make the world a better place.

Stay in tune with yourself and document your progress, as you pave the way for others who may be following in your footsteps.

It’s no accident you’ve faced the challenges that you have encountered in your past. No matter how you came through that circumstance, you made it here, and your story beckons to be told to others who are treacherously approaching a challenge, like the one you had to endure.

This is your time, this is your moment, take charge, inspire or help someone else.

Your experience might save someone’s life.