Blog | David M Masters

Viva Las Vegas

I love Las Vegas, though admittedly I haven’t been there for a while for I was waiting for my life to get to a certain state before venturing back there again. Nonetheless, the planets seemed to align and I found myself in my favorite town once again.

It was a good chance to visit the city which is constantly in a state of change. Some of my favorite casinos were gone and even more magnificent monolithic architectural structures stood in their stead, while others were currently undergoing reconstruction. I try to make sure to spend time both on the strip and downtown on Freemont Street.

There is such a variety of culture and cuisine opportunities. Many geographical areas around the United States and the world are represented as well as their exquisite food which ranges from the basic foot-long hot dog and buffets to designer hamburgers and ornate French culinary artistry (and everything in between).

Always the fan of entertainment and celebration of the arts, I adore the wide variety of options ranging from street performers and nightclub acts to Broadway shows and the most extravagant venues imaginable.

If you have a hankering for sharing your talent or ideas wandering the streets of Las Vegas, you might like to know that there are no permits or licenses required by law to perform on the streets and it is one of the huge public venues where you truly have (nearly) unlimited freedom of expression.

Then there are the people. If you enjoy sampling the widest variety of individuals from all over the United States and the world, this is the place. Though it’s not as much a family-friendly environment as you might expect, the majority of the folks who come here are adults ranging from the newly-acquired adulthood to the senior citizen. Everyone is represented in the Las Vegas playground.

On this last trip, a young hip hop artist was giving away CD samples of his music in hopes that someone walking the strip might be able to “discover” his unique brand of talent. Passing by, I reached for the CD in his outstretched hand. He pulled it back and said, “Sorry, man. This is hip hop and you too old and too white for this shit.”

Interesting response, I thought. For all he knew, I could have been an A&R director for a big recording company. Nonetheless, a rude reminder that I am not the spring chicken I once was. Clearly I am older and plausibly paler, so he gets credit for observation of the obvious, and while I appreciate hip hop, I am not an enormous fan of it.

Later that night, a lovely young woman offered to spend some quality time with me, possibly including a sleepover. When I told her that I was holding out for my soul mate and wife, she offered to be both my soul mate and wife for the evening. I blushed, thanked her for the offer, and wished her good luck on her search for a partner tonight. It was a pleasant contrast to being too old and too white.

When you go to Vegas, don’t be surprised if you run into someone from your hometown, or find you are recognized by someone from your past. This happens to me almost every time I go to Las Vegas, a reminder that it is such a small world.

I so enjoy the hypnotic effect of all the neon, flashing lights, huge video displays and music playing on the streets (and that’s just outside), inside the casino hotels is another experience altogether.

And where else could you vacation, where thanks to the gaming, you could actually come back home with more money than you left with; and had so much fun doing it?

There is an implied level of confidentiality asserting, “What happens in Vegas Stays in Vegas,” but I don’t know, I saw a lot of cell phones documenting embarrassing events that were sure to be shared on YouTube.

I think the reason I am drawn to Vegas is because Las Vegas is a metaphor for me.

I am always growing and changing. There are all kinds of excitement happening inside me, and every type of emotional combination moves throughout my consciousness. The flashing neon synapses firing within dazzle the possibilities. I don’t mind dabbling in chance a little. I adore the arts and am deeply moved by articulate execution, ambitious performance or heartfelt prose.

This is my kind of town, because I am a little Vegas myself.

What Does Integrity Mean?

I talk a lot about integrity when I am working with people, and you’d be surprised to find that while people will agree about integrity’s importance, they may perceive its definition differently.

While the official definition of integrity might be:

“The quality of being honest and having strong moral principles; moral uprightness.”

There is a deeper meaning among those who are on a path to enlightenment; a more accurate integrity definition would be something, like this:

“To have integrity means you hold yourself to a high standard of doing the things you say regardless circumstance or feeling.”

In other words, you keep your word, elsewise no one could truly put their trust in you. An old adage referring to integrity was, “A man’s word is his bond.” This translates to

“If I tell you something, you can count on it coming to pass.”

Back in the day, this standard of integrity only applied to the masculine sex due to their ability to make a thing so was far more likely due to the feminine’s lack of resources; this does not apply today, as women too have the ability to manifest a result just as equally (or more so) than their male counterparts.

The first objection to come to mind for anyone contemplating the heaviness of possessing a high degree of integrity and the meaning of integrity in general might be

“What if I change my mind?”

Change is a matter to be weighed any time anyone makes a commitment, gives their word or generally agrees to anything. It is a constant throughout time that things will happen, circumstances may change or additional knowledge may have been withheld at the time the affirmation was agreed to.

“So, what do I do, if I gave my word and now find myself in a quandary?”

Integrity also allows for the integrous individual to alter his or her word, without much loss of one’s value of integrity if it is handled with integrity.

An integrous person who is unable to keep their word must approach the active party/parties with humility and honesty, explaining their inability to keep his or her word due to whatever circumstances apply, then ask for feedback, solutions or alternatives to make things right.

The highest level of integrity would be to keep your word and follow through regardless of feelings, circumstances of even due to lack of integrity of other parities who may have been involved. The next best thing would be to enter a negotiation to see if all parties can agree on a compromise that they all can live with. It might not be ideal or completely integrous, but it is honorable to

Do the right thing

Which may mean considering changes in circumstances and renegotiation; though it can be problematic if after much deliberation no compromise can be found.

If no compromise can be agreed to there may be an inevitable loss of integrity as well as trust that may have been associated with it.

If you find yourself often unable to keep your word, you may find that you agree to things too quickly, without practicing due diligence or reviewing the ramifications of your commitment prior to agreement. In this case, consider enforcing your own hesitation to allow time for thoughtful consideration before agreeing to anything. This can help to preserve your integrity.

Recovery of a high level of integrity may be established after a time of demonstrating one’s level of integrity over time.

A small number of people within our population actually adhere to any level of integrity, as the majority focus completely on how they feel at any given moment, and this lack of integrity has led our society to where it is today.

On the other hand, there are people, like us, who choose to hold ourselves to a higher standard.

If nothing else, people know us by our ability to follow through and be counted on, regardless of circumstance or how we feel.

This is the definition of integrity.

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Religious or Spiritual Abuse Recovery

There is hope for victims of religious or spiritual abuse. It is not uncommon for someone who has suffered at the hands of a religious organization, leader, spiritual mentor or counselor to recoil from the event in a negative way.

Of course this type of abuse can take many forms… The abuse could be psychological or emotional in nature or physiological including everything from physical abuse to (thankfully more rare) sexual indiscretions. Primary psychological assaults include the loss of individuality or self-worth in an attempt to promote single-mindedness and ease of group management, loss of personal rights, intimidation and dominance.

Spiritual and religious organizations’ leadership rosters are often infiltrated by sociopathic or psychopathic individuals who are driven to exercise control over others whom they see as lesser or subservient. In the event that you have had the unfortunate encounter with such an overbearing individual; you must know that he or she may not be an adequate representation of the group or organization that he or she represents.

What happens if you ask questions or question authority? In a spiritually abusive environment one may experience ridicule for asking questions and you may sense an increasingly hostile response with threats of excommunication or threats of eternal consequences.

An extremely exclusive organization may promote isolation from outsiders, cutting ties to non-believers promoting an “Us vs. Them,” attitude. Other signs you might be subjected to potential spiritual abuse may include multiple markers indicating levels of spirituality (and/or entitlement), penalties for non-compliance and financial exploitation.

You may have been the victim of religious or spiritual abuse if:

A religious organization or spiritual leader
1. Defrauds via deception
2. Manipulates
3. Exercises forms of mind control
4. Emotionally exploits
5. Psychologically abuses
A spiritually-based group that
1. Has a dual reality (insiders vs. outsiders)
2. Secret rites or insider’s only, “truths”
3. Critically denounces outsiders
4. Expresses dire consequences for non-members
5. Enforces compliance
An organization that
1. Denounces criticism
2. Maintains a false public image
3. Requires donation of one’s personal belongings
4. Claims to have ultimate “enlightenment”
5. Practices an elitist perspective

Protecting one’s self from dangerous, compromising or litigious circumstances is completely normal and necessary for self preservation, yet our defensive response is in the form of overcompensation. It’s not uncommon for a victim of this kind of abuse to turn their backs totally on all things of a spiritual nature.

Believing in a higher power can be one of the most empowering forces in your life; to completely reject the entire concept based on a single episodic experience, could have a devastating effect one’s overall quality of life.

Regardless of the excessive intensity of your experience, you can be among the many survivors of religious or spiritual abuse, with your faith firmly intact. Although you may have isolated yourself from all things spiritual in order to put a stop to the abuse, you can reclaim your spirituality in a positive and life-affirming way.

Whether you are struggling with these issues from occurrences of this kind of abuse in the past, or if you are concerned about victimization that may be taking place in the present, there is hope for you to realize a continued spiritual life, free from bondage or pain as a result of the person(s), group or organization who may have, or may be exploiting you, either indirectly or maliciously.

Unresolved spiritual abuse can have continued negative impact on one’s life harboring resentment, lack of trust, difficulty in inter-personal relationships; blocking personal achievement, abundance, happiness and preventing you from achieving your highest and best.

You can heal from your abusive past so that you can go on with your life no longer being a victim. Take charge of your life, embrace your spiritual healing and don’t let this experience from experiencing all the best things this life has to offer and start your healing process today.

As you peel back the layers of your experience, you may discover this has prepared you for your ability to reach out to other victims as a mentor to help them deal with the same challenges you have survived.

See you at the Recovery from Religious Trauma Event in Olympia, September 21st

Discover and Energize Your Innate Gifts

Everyone comes to this planet with a unique set of gifts or innate abilities to share with other inhabitants. The most successful people in the world know what their life’s message is and utilizing their special gifts make a huge contribution to society, humanity and/or the overall outlook of the earth.

Many adults when questioned about what their gifts, innate abilities, or life’s message is respond with something, like, “That’s not realistic,” or some other comment discounting the thought that they may have a higher purpose.

That programmed response could be the result of possibly the biggest conspiracy of our age.

Many years of working with people to discover and embrace their gifts and life’s message has proven time and time again that early in a child’s youth, every child is in tune with their gifts and message.

Every once and a while you see a youth who is totally absorbed by their innate abilities, these are the young prodigies. They are revered, yet rare; yet every child is born a prodigy.

The conspiracy lies within our societal programming. In an effort to have a reasonable amount of control of the masses, those who maintain our, “safety and security,” have built into the structure of our society a strict set of checks and balances to ensure their ability to exercise this control.

So, we have public schools, and as our children grow we tell them that their dreams are folly as we try to replace those dreams with more, “realistic,” or acceptable aspirations, i.e., finish high school, go to college and get a good job with benefits. And that is exactly what the machine desires and needs; a majority of mindless parts that exist for the running (or benefit) of the machine.

Granted this analogy may appear to be an exaggeration, nonetheless, you know in your heart of hearts that you were meant for more than this. Something inside you knows there must be more to life than having a nice car, house with a picket fence, a huge cable/internet package, designer clothing and money (or credit) to spend on food and toys. That feeling that there’s something more is your innate gifts crying to be released.

For those I work with to get their gifts, talents and message(s) in balance with their physical reality are geared up for a significant life change. Discovery is just the first part of the task at hand.

The next step is finding ways to integrate your inner-self with your outer-self (the physical reality that everyone else now accepts as being, “you”).

Fortunate for society, not everyone seeks to fulfill their life’s purpose or dreams; only the select few who rise above the masses in an effort to achieve their highest and best and make the world a better place. Because if the masses were to capture this level of life congruency, we would be surrounded by the magic of success, abundance and our societal structure would disintegrate, as the free-thinking people began to change the world to fit their new realities.

You can enjoy extreme levels of peace, joy, happiness and fulfillment from being united with your life’s purpose; leading to a new, expanded, productive life filled with health, wellness, love, compassion and a brighter future. You, will begin to see all the issues in your life will begin to resolve themselves as you attune your life with your unique calling.

Become the master of your own destiny, transform your life, fulfill your life’s purpose and achieve your highest and best by harnessing your innate gifts.

Life Choices, Challenges and Changes

It is common throughout one’s life journey to encounter forks in the road requiring having to make a choice of which path would best suit one’s best interests, unexpected obstacles that present you with challenges or unforeseen changes in life circumstance.

You inner guidance system is there for you to assist you in examining all the possibilities when faced with life’s choices, challenges and changes.

Choices

We are faced with making conscious choices that we must make as we navigate throughout our life’s journey, everything from the casual choices, like, what clothes should I wear; what food should I eat? How should I fix my hair; or which shoes should I put on my feet? To more consequential choices, like, should I tell my partner how I really feel; or consider a new vocation? Should I continue to conceal, reveal or consider relocation?

When facing more critical choices in life, we must consider all the ramifications of our decisions, enabling us to make responsible decisions; especially when our choices affect the lives of others who we share our journey with. An honorable person considers others outside of our experience in reverence of the greater good. To not do so is to be selfish, self-centered, or possibly narcissistic in the extreme.

Then there are the consequences of our choices that need to be reviewed before making choices, especially decisions that carry gravity in our social arenas, or may even affect the world that we live in.

It is prudent to seek out an unbiased third party to help sort out the best details. Unlike a professional, friends, family and acquaintances do not always have your best interests at heart when consulting them for advice because they have their own vested interests and agendas, when evaluating the details of your quandary.

Your inner guidance system is there to help you with your choices when you can find the proper attenuation or vibration to sense its knowingness, so that you have the highest and best probability of success.

Challenges

As we travel through this life, it is not uncommon to encounter challenges that we face. In some cases we may feel as though the obstacles in our way are insurmountable. It is your goal to reframe your life’s circumstances and develop a plan to mitigate the damages as you are empowered to face these challenges head on, with the best possible outcome.

These challenges can be at home, at work or in the most innermost part of our being when struggling with identity, (who we really are) or destiny (our life’s purpose) in an effort to enhance and enrich our lives as we move on to the next level of our higher self.

Changes

Unlike choices or challenges, which we have much more control over, there are times when we find ourselves in situations that have come about that are completely outside of our control.

This can be the result of loss; the loss of a job, failure of a business, a romantic relationship that has not turned out the way we had planned. The loss of a significant person in our life, either by proximity, participation, or even a loss of life altogether makes one’s journey more difficult to navigate in the light of such significant changes at times.

These situations need not seem utterly unbearable as it may seem. Oftentimes, effective communication with your inner guidance system can get you from the place where you are, often feeling helpless, to where you want to be, empowered, fulfilled and onto the high quality of life that you deserve.

Many tools, techniques and strategies, like the T Chart, are available that have been honed over a time that have helped others, just like you, who have struggled with life’s choices, challenges and changes.

It is time that you begin living your best life, achieving your highest and best.

Take back the reigns of your life and put you back in the driver’s seat, in control of your life circumstances.

The Past is the Past

One of the most debilitating conditions humans can encounter is that of emotional pain, from loss, abuse or regret. Interestingly, we suffer this pain independently of any physical condition, yet the physiological distress can be as serious as the psychological discomfort.

Indeed our thoughts control our emotions, and our physiological wellbeing. When the past haunts us in our present state of mind, the past is not in the past as it keeps impeding on the present becoming a component of “now,” instead of being safely stored in the past where it belongs.

When one has suffered a psychological trauma (which can be demonstrated physiologically as illness or disease) as a result of something that has happened in the past (like, post traumatic stress disorder, for instance), the standard response from someone who hasn’t walked a mile in your shoes is, “Just get over it. The past is the past.”

Ah, “the past is the past;” the mantra of the psychopath. That’s what a psychopath says when he or she has committed a significant transgression, and expects you to disregard the past because it cannot be changed (here’s where they insert assertions about how much they’ve changed, assuring you that you would never be at-risk again) all in an effort to set you up for the next unexpected blow.

In general, psychopaths are unique in that they have no feelings, no feeling of love, remorse, guilt… they are psychologically bullet-proof (or bankrupt)… they have no need to seek forgiveness, nor do they accept responsibility for their missteps… To those of us who suffer emotionally from being abused, wronged or traumatized, this would be considered a superpower… and in some ways, it is.

Bottling up suppressed emotional trauma related to the past weighs heavily on the normal operating condition of the human body and is not an effective approach to dealing with PTSD.

Thankfully, there are therapeutic models that help people deal with traumatic incidents that have been experienced in the past that continue to thwart our sense of well-being. Enter what I refer to as, “Time Machine Therapy.”

I know that the idea of a time machine seems like a bit too much science fiction for the average person… but time travel has been accomplished using the power of the mind for thousands of years, though some intellectuals insist that it’s only been about 150 years… It doesn’t really matter how long it’s been, what does matter is that it is an effective process that can have valuable healing power today.

With access to this potent therapeutic modality we have challenged that famous catch-all phrase, “the past is the past,” because now, we have a method not only to access the past, but to manipulate or even change the past.

It’s also important to have access to the skills that it takes to let go of the past, to disconnect the physiological connection that leads to discomfort and stress. There are many methods available to help you overcomes traumatic loss or change in your life, and to put you back in the driver’s seat of your life.

Being distracted by the concerns about one’s past makes it difficult to navigate one’s present. That is why it is imperative to deal with the issues of the past for a normal person (does not apply to psychopaths or sociopaths) in order to not have your cognitive resources bogged-down with the burden of yesterday.

It is imperative to begin to live in the present, and you can get you from there to here and powerfully empowered to be the best that you can be.

You might ask, “When accessing or altering the past, do we still retain the lessons learned?”

That’s a good question; and the answer depends on the client. In most cases, we can retain the memories, disconnecting the feelings connected to them. In rare cases, entire memories need to be altered or erased in order to preserve a healthy perspective of the client.

A common response to that is, “That sounds like brainwashing!”

You may associate a lot of negative associations to the idea of tampering with one’s memories, but this is done at the request – and with the full cooperation and consciousness – of the client; and in times of emotional crises time machine therapy is a healthy alternative to a condition that might otherwise be unmanageable.

In the event that wiping the slate clean is necessary, the client is always equipped with the combination to the mental safe that keeps those memories locked safely away, if it becomes important to access them once again.

Once you are in charge of your life again, you will find yourself making positive progress, changing your future and the world for a better life, your best life and make the world a better place. You may feel regret from opportunities that were lost as a result of your previous struggles with issues from your past – as though you have lost a piece of your past that may have been better spent – and may have thought that you lost your chance for this or that… Not true. Once you are back in the present you can be and do more than you may have ever imagined because you are more empowered and aware than ever before.

You will no longer be limited by false inhibitions or past burdens. Everyone deals with the issues of their past in different ways, and there are a quantity of tools and techniques that ensure that you can have a positive outlook for you and those whom you care about.

Live a Better Life Your Best Life

Many of my clients, friends, and followers have been asking about when my next book is coming out. Well, finally, here it is.

It is based on the number one question I get asked on the street. It may come in many forms, but is basically, “How do you live such an amazing life?” followed by, “How can I do that?” Though the second half of the question is more often than not misstated as “I wish I could do that,” or, “I could never live a life like yours.”

The truth is, you can – anyone can – if you follow the basic ideas contained within this book.

Of course, I could not afford to sit down with each person individually and work with them on their life’s journey, but thanks to your queries and encouragement, I’ve collected these ideas, which I would share with you in person if we had the opportunity and time to spend together.

My clients are spoiled because they get unfiltered access to me and enjoy the benefits thereof and now you can, too.

If you’d like to live a more amazing life, without having to spend a lot of time and money on professional coaching, this is a great way to get started. So, run out and get a copy from Amazon or your local bookstore, and let me know what you think.

Also, be aware that I am in the process of expanding my service arena to better serve a larger audience, so keep in touch with me and I will let you know what new programs you can participate in as they become available.

Get ready to start living your best life ever as we spend time together via this printed word, which I have filled with my intention and purpose. We will see and feel each other’s presence as you read these words and begin to see your new life eagerly waiting to join you.

We are going to have a blast!

Love and light,

~ David

Here’s the scoop on the book:

Live a Better Life, Your Best Life and Make the World a Better Place

By David M Masters

Price: $20.00

Description:

In this book, you will find the tools, tips, techniques, and thought patterns that will enable anyone who desires to live not only a better life but one’s best life ever.

The story of your best life starts now, no matter what your stage and circumstance in life is, you are at the right time and the right place to start living your most amazing life.

According to author David M Masters, we all have come to this planet with a unique mission and message to share with the world which is buried deep within at a very early age. When you become realigned with your purpose in life, your life explodes into the best life ever.

Even if you think you’re not worthy, or unqualified, it doesn’t matter; and if you’re feeling bad, like you’ve lost everything, or have no reason to go on…

You’re in the right place at the right time

To reinvent and live a better life and launch your best life full of abundance and happiness that you might have never believed possible.

“The best stories start like that.”

Masters says his life-long mission has been to help others achieve their highest and best.

Now is your time to live a better life – your best life – and make the world a better place as you discover your mission and share your message.

About the Author:

David M Masters is a motivational speaker, author, and life coach. His focus seems to be on personal development, self-improvement, and achieving success in various aspects of life. He offers guidance and support to individuals seeking to improve their lives, find their purpose, and overcome challenges.

The basis of David M Masters’ philosophy seems to revolve around empowering individuals to take control of their lives and create positive changes. He emphasizes the importance of personal growth, self-reflection, and transforming limiting beliefs into empowering ones. Masters believes in the potential for individuals to shape their reality, achieve their goals, and find fulfillment.

People who might be attracted to David M Masters for assistance are likely individuals who are seeking personal transformation, motivation, and guidance in various areas of their lives. This could include individuals looking to improve their relationships, careers, finances, or overall well-being. People attracted to his philosophy may be interested in personal development, self-discovery, and unlocking their full potential.

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Crime Victim Recovery

Realizing that you have been victimized in some way by crime can have a devastating effect on one’s life. One can become a victim of crime in many different ways. Some examples of the types of crime victims that can be overcome include:

Adolescent Victims of Abuse

This could be a young, underage person who has been physically or emotionally victimized either by another adolescent or adult and may include molestation, or physical abuse resulting in injuries, like, bruising, broken bones or other maladies. This could be an immediate issue, or one that has continued to cause suffering through adulthood.

Adult Physical or Emotional Assault or Abuse

Again the spectrum covers the widest range of forms of assault or abuse. Assault or abuse can include everything from psychological manipulation or mind-control techniques to physical threat of violence or the use (real or implied) of a deadly weapon.

Gang Violence

The obvious negative effect of gangs on or society is the victimizations of others who may or may not be actively involved in the gang environment; and may include all forms of crime, violence and/or victimization.

Random Act of Violence

Occasionally victims of violence are simply in the wrong place at the wrong time when a violent act occurs. This is the most difficult type of violence to rationalize, due to its randomness. Acts of terrorism may result in violence that may be experienced as random.

Sexual Assault/Abuse

Obviously these crimes are sexual in nature but also cover a wide breadth of possible assaultive or inappropriate methods that can have an emotional impact on the victim. This category includes sexual harassment, inappropriate touching, rape, incest, exhibition or pornography without consent.

DUI or DWI Victim

These victims have special needs because there may be no logical rationalization for the victimization except for maybe being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Unlike a random act of violence, there is a definitive underlying cause of either driving under the influence or driving while intoxicated while piloting a 3,000 pound weapon. Victim may also include the driver operating a vehicle under the influence of alcohol or drugs, presenting a completely different set of emotional issues.

Human Trafficking

You might be surprised to know that human trafficking is alive and well in the USA. Often we associate human trafficking as something that only happens elsewhere.

Property Loss, Robbery, Theft, White-collar Crime

This is the most annoying type of crime for our judicial system… After all, “How would you feel if someone took something from you?” Of course the perpetrator wouldn’t like, it… but their answer is simply to re-steal it from someone else. Many thieves are psychopaths or sociopaths who have no conscious or regard for others; no social boundaries.

Usually these crimes are less violent and involve deception and manipulation to facilitate loss or injury but may have a violent influence by integrating a threat of violence (or presence of deadly weapon) in the con. May include identity theft, embezzlement or fraud whereby the perpetrator gains unfairly at the expense of the victim or arson.

Stalking

Stalking includes any unwanted contact between two persons and can occur at home, at work, or now even online. Thankfully, our judicial system has supported an effort to curtail stalking and has initiated laws to protect you from stalking and cyber-stalking.

Vulnerable Adults

Some adults, who are advanced in age or may have a physical or mental dysfunction or disability, may be more susceptible to becoming a victim of any crime. Realizing this, our government has passed new laws that offer protection and more severe penalties for defending the rights of vulnerable adults.

Elder abuse and fraud falls under this category also.

Homicide Survivors

Friends, relatives and loved-ones of murder victims often suffer emotionally and the grief from underlying unresolved issues can be debilitating.

This brief list is not by any means complete, but gives you the idea of the types of crime victims that can be overcome to stop the victimization, cessation of continued pain and discomfort and moving on victoriously in a positive manner.

Victims of crime can suffer from a variety of physical and emotional pain. Examples of issues of victims commonly addressed I have encountered with clients include:

Loss of sense of security and/or fearfulness
Ruminating or the re-playing of the event or circumstances ad nauseam
Haunted by dreams, nightmares or sleep depravation
Social withdrawal or detachment
Internalization, guilt or self-blame
Memory of concentration dysfunction
Poor self-image, helplessness
Bleak future outlook
Lack of trust

Know that you are not alone. There are specialists experienced in dealing with victims who struggle with these symptoms of crime victimization, and are well-equipped to help you deal with these and many other issues that you might be struggling with.

Review your recovery options and put you back in control of your life.

What, Me Worry?

“If anything can go wrong, it will,” is not only reportedly a summation of Murphy’s Law, but also a prime tenet of a person who is consumed with worry. Worrying about things, leads to stress and a host of other conditions and as a negative emotional state attracts more negativity.

It is reasonable to be concerned about life, loved ones and life circumstances, but when concern overtakes rational thought, it becomes worry; and worry is a killer.

Worry is an effective demonstration of the power of thought, because:

What is worry?

Thought (or concern) out of control.

And worry tends to become a self-fulfilling prophesy.

Why do people worry?

Unfortunately, worry does seem to make you feel like you’re in control. I mean, if you ruminate on the worst case scenario and it comes to pass, then you have not been surprised and there is comfort in seeing your predictions come true. “See, I told you so,” is the worrier’s mantra, which even makes someone with low self esteem feel superior in the moment.

Sorrowfully, the physiological, psychological and sociological impact of harboring worry and the stress it causes on the mind, body and spirit is dangerous.

People who have a tendency to worry about things are less well than their carefree contemporaries. Physiologically, worriers are prone to high blood pressure, blood clotting, heart attack, stroke, stomach aches, heartburn, constipation, diarrhea, body aches and pains including headaches and back pain.

Worry can have a profound effect on respiratory conditions including loss of breath or asthma and even skin conditions such as dry skin, itch, rash or causing the worrier to break out in hives.

Worry compromises your immune system, increasing susceptibility to being overcome by bacteria, viruses, and other disease like hypertension, diabetes and cancers.

Worry also impacts out psychological paradigms leading to anxiety, phobias, and hypochondria, increasing restlessness, fatigue, lack of concentration, irritability, problems associated with sleep and may leave the worrier with a clinical diagnosis of generalized anxiety disorder.

Sociological impact can affect all your relationships, as your fall victim to paranoia and lack of trust which could lead to increased domestic disturbances and loss of interest in sex. Worry also affects one’s ability to manage finances, hold a job or conduct business as usual and if conditions persist may cause being disrespected by peers and an inability to cope with everyday life, let alone unforeseen disruptions or challenges that might arise.

Stop Worrying

Right, we all know we would be better off without being bogged down with worry. No one actually wants to be consumed by worry or be labeled a worry wart. Worry is bad, we get that, but to stop worrying altogether, is quite a jump because worry is a negative state of mind that could easily be an addiction.

How to Stop Worrying

To change one’s process of thinking is a process that takes time. The axiom, “one day at a time,” is totally apropos when deciding to shift from negative thought processes (especially if heavily ingrained over time) to more conscious, positive thought processes.

If you know it is time to change, you can stop worrying the moment you recognize it. Think of worrying like you are on fire, your body is engulfed in flames. What are the rules?

Stop, Drop and Roll

Stop the thought by interrupting it. Say the word, “Stop,” out-loud (if you’re in private) or slap your forehead (the one-handed clap, as my friend calls it). Drop that thought, like it’s a hot potato and roll it over into a positively spun thought.

For instance, if you’re worrying, “I’ll never be able to finish this assignment on time, and I may be demoted or lose my job if I don’t…”

Stop! (Slap)

Drop that thought, and

Roll it into a more positive one, like, “I am doing the best I can, maybe I can do better. In fact, if I rearrange my schedule and put a little more effort into this, it might be awesome and on-time. I might even get a promotion.”

Small shifts, like this, can have a huge impact on your life, liberating your from the ill effects or worry, so that you can go on about your life as you begin to enjoy all the good things this life has to offer.

Got It You Can Do It

There is no doubt, you got this and you can do it, but what does it take to get from here to there? And how can I move more quickly and confidently towards what I want?

As you may have noticed, some people are more likely to attract the things they desire because, like Larry the Cable Guy, they simply git er done. But what makes them think they can do it?

The substructure that is the foundation of their can do attitude is a general feeling of knowing they have confidence to problem-solve and achieve. This confidence can come from a variety of sources, like:

Mastery, Witness, Social Empowerment and Wellbeing

Mastery of a particular skill or practice implies that you have performed this particular activity with a satisfactory result before. The level of mastery is dependent on how many times you have completed this task with a level of competency. The knowledge that you have been there and done that without fail gives you the confidence and competence to think that you’re likely to successfully do so the next time the opportunity arises.

The witness has seen a procedure from start to finish on one or more occasions and believes it is possible to reproduce a satisfactory result based on the fact that he or she has seen the process before.

If you have witnessed a process in action, obviously it’s not the same thing as having done it before but you have a huge advantage over the majority of people who have no idea about how to even go about performing such a task.

Social empowerment is magical, because it bolsters your confidence in your ability to perform something you may not be officially qualified to do. This would apply to something you have never actually done or even witnessed before.

You might find yourself in this situation, if others believe you are the person who has the ability to get things done, so naturally, they are drawn to you to tackle a particular project. Even though you have no history of doing it before, their confidence in your ability supports your belief that you can actually do it, which gives you the confidence to move forward (often with satisfactory results).

Then there is wellbeing. Wellbeing represents the raw materials necessary to get through whatever task or challenge you face. You must have the physiological wherewithal to move through all the necessary steps which may require energy, a degree of strength and/or stamina. A healthy person knows they have these reserves in check, ready to go for it.

The people who are in the habit of getting things done are likely not sickly or depressed, but if they are, they have the ability to push beyond their biological or psychological limitations for the duration of the project at hand.

Armed with any degree of any of these four categories of support Mastery, Witness, Social Empowerment or Wellbeing will give you the strength or courage to be able to view a particular project or task as an opportunity, rather than a threat. You will be able to rationalize, set and achieve the goals necessary to move through the project and navigate unforeseen interruptions as challenges and deal with them appropriately. And in the event that you have tackled a project full on and have not achieved a satisfactory result, you don’t take it too hard.

To you, there is no such thing as failure. You take the knowledge from your experience and file it away for use (or avoidance) the next time the opportunity arises to demonstrate what you can do.

Category: Blog